


Dread's Touch

by trendingtrash



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Realities, F/M, Galra Empire, Intense, Mind Control, Mind Manipulation, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Shiro (Voltron), Reader Has Problems, Reader is kidda important, Reader-Insert, Science, Slow Burn, Team Voltron Family, The Paladins are great people, Voltron - Legendary Defender: Season One, but is too nice to tell anybody, hints of klance, magic - sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-29
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2018-10-12 12:37:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 32
Words: 62,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10491039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trendingtrash/pseuds/trendingtrash
Summary: You have no intention in getting into any trouble, only to pick up the broken pieces that had been crashed by your previous job.But trouble can't help but find you and you are drawn into Shiro's 'runaway' and whether you like it or not, you have been dragged into something much more dangerous then a simple kidnapping.





	1. Chapter One: Broken's Laugh

**Author's Note:**

> This book was written before Season Three, so it could be incorrect in places! But do enjoy nonetheless!
> 
> ALSO Adam, Shiro's significant other or his sexuality is not mentioned in here, mainly because of the reason above. I hope that that is okay. I just wanted to address the cute couple to be honest XD
> 
> Also spelling errors will be present - probably after I publish all the chapters I'll get onto editing it out....

\------

It was happening again, you knew as you felt your body freeze, your muscles coiling up within themselves and you heart hammering within your rib-cage, you mind crawling desperately at this episode. You didn't want this, but half of your mind did.

You suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder – PTSD – and hated it. It was your breaking point where you would not return from for the rest of the day, even when the spell broke.

You would be ashamed for longer.

It wasn't as though it could be helped,it was common in a solider to suffer from it, weather it was a passing thing, or twisted evilly in the mind and lingered for years –and years. That's what frightened you the most, you wanted to be able to be able to travel Earth – and maybe beyond, without the fear of being snapped. Afraid that you would break. Your concentration would cripple and you would wildly fight against the memory. Sometimes you would question if they got your condition wrong - if they mistook the images or something wrong. But there was nothing to pin point, or claim they did. So you lived with living under the condition's name. 

Every student within her class knew of your condition and gracefully accepted the fact, but it didn't stop the uncoiling feeling of shame that laid heavy in your stomach each time.

Sometimes you would just get angry and stressed, you heart hammering and sweat breaking out on your forehead– other times you stood frozen as your mind calculated the resemblance of the certain object that had caught your attention.

Being a teacher probably didn't help things in the slightest, it's loud atmosphere and cruel jokes never did sit well with you, but you remained. And you had no idea why. The class lapsed into silence as you gathered up your wits, cheeks burning as your brother's body vanished from reality. "Sorry about that." You apologized weakly, as the class gave a chorus of 'don't you worry, Ms.'s. You nodded ruefully, shaking you head as you balanced your laptop on your hand, glancing to the broad, "Now where was I?" you whisper to yourself, knowing fully well the students were listening.

There was callings of both lies and truths and you sent them a quick smile, as Lance put up his hand quickly, "About Flight Control" He announced truthfully, sending his rivals a grin of menace. 

You nodded furiously, "Ah yes, that'sit, thank you Lance." You didn't miss the devilish glares shot back at the quick witted boy. If you were a couple of years younger you would've be sitting in this very class, probably glaring at him as well. You after all wanted to get into the other interesting stuff.

Now look where that got me, you thought ruefully, unconsciously tugging at your ear in thought.

You were a'ex-military', on first year you camp got ripped to shreds by bombs.Then you were sent out to teach at the Galaxy Garrison, where you would remain probably the rest of your younger years. Here you got help, out in the world you would have to help yourself. Pay for the appointments, the pills, the sleepless nights. You weren't ready for that. The students were good company anyway, well respectable on your behalf and intelligent. It wouldn't kill you to stay, it was after all the only taste in adventure that you'd be allowed, said the Doctors,which frustrated you to no end.

You had meet many individuals that suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and still got out onto the field, they just didn't think you were capable of being able to recover – or move on. Which, yet again, annoyed you greatly. But you took the Doctors advise and limited your time of adventure and out your mind to other things, like school work.

You sighed deeply as the bell ringing, significantly ending class. You slumped into your seat as the student rapidly packed up, and signally filed out of the room. You watched them leave with no small amount of disdain. Lance and Hunk were the last to leave, pausing at the door.

Lance was the first to speak, "Are you sure you don't want me to catch up on work?" He asked,directing the question to you, looking hopeful.

You managed a smile, "No Lance, you are on track. Commander Iverson would kill me and you if he found out that you skipped. Get to his class already."

Lance managed out a loud moan in protest, "But I could help you..." he suggested, although he knew his battle was already lost.

You laughed at his defeated expression,"If you listen and strive to succeed in his class, you'd have nothing to worry about." You encouraged, packing your own things up.

Lance sighed, giving you a wary glare,"And what are you saying, Ms. L/N? That I don't try in his class?" He pouted childishly, as Hunk tugged at his sleeve,looking as though was was thoroughly down with Lance's behavior.

"You heard her,Lance. No. N. O. No." Hunk draw out, like he was coaxing a child.

Lance tugged his sleeve away, pout remaining. "All I'm saying-"

Hunk's face fall,"Imagine if we were late." He mused, his own horror clear on his face, brow creasing.

You sighed, "Go Lance. It looks as though Hunk wants to last awhile longer. Shoo."You stood, slinging your bag onto your shoulder, giving him a lazy dismissive gesture. Finally Lance obeyed, sending you a friendly smile, before departing.

You watched the pair leave, fingers locking around the strap of the bag. It was the last class you had today and would remain locked in your room and you organized tomorrow classes. It was all you could do. Sighing, you uncurled your fingers from your bag and quickly rubbed down the broad, before setting down the duster, staring distantly into the reflection of the whiteboard. The object that triggered you hung on the wall.

You hadn't noticed it's presence before, but now it was setting you on edge, making you nervous, you muscles tensing as you studied it again, before repeating the process. You were determined to make in familiar to you and that's how you did it. Scanning the object, before scanning it again, and again, and again, until your eyes hurt and you brain started to comprehend the colour of the walls.

Licking your lips nervously, you pushed a strand of hair away from your face and left,praying that it wouldn't happen tomorrow.

-

You sighed heavily as you tugged through the hallways, aware of students putting themselves to their dooms, allowing you to remain in the dark of the Staff Room light, and move onward. The hallways extended far and wide, allowing a good amount of walking to clear your head without having to step outside. You were glad for the distraction.Pressing forward, you gathered your wits at the familiar clicking of boots echoed across the hallway. Commander Iverson. The man was like a echoing image of your brother, who was hard and unforgiving,allowing you an unfair advantage to appear reasonably well when you meet him in hallways – other teachers didn't actually know how to do anything under his shadow and you were glad for you up-bring to allow the fear to slid aside. You offered him a small smile, moving aside from him, glad he didn't pay you much attention as your shoulder brushed against each other as you passed, unable to move aside quickly enough.

Commander Iverson turned as you hurried your step, "Commander L/N." He called,causing you to wince – you had made it painfully clear that you didn't what Commander L/N, only Ms. Or Ms. L/N. You lead no group,only the students you taught.

You paused looking back at him, "Yes?" You asked, voice clear and steady.

His dark eyes scanned your posture, "Do you need a couple of days off?" He asked, his voice surprisingly lowing,

You bowed your head, "Commander-" you started meekly, unsure on how to approach it. You did want your days off, but those students needed-

His eyebrows shot up, but his face remained soft, "You need them, take them off."

Who were you kidding? The students didn't need you, they needed a better teacher, a couple of days would do them good, you reasoned with yourself, and me good, you added in afterthought. 

You cleared your throat, "Commander Iverson... thank you." You managed, head thumping.

He waved aside your thanks, "After tonight, you're still on tonight?" He asked, voice still gentle – as though he was cooing a child to sleep. You bridled with annoyance at the thought.

You nodded firmly this time, setting you chin, "Yes I am."

He grinned, seeing passed your bravo, before departing without another word. You were glad. Grunting against you frustration you moved on,weaving into the shadows that you learnt to use, since you were young and wanting to out. Now you only wanted in.

Drifting in and out of your old thoughts, you walked on, noticing nothing suspicious as you moved through the corridors. Nothing.

Pouting at your own boredom you paused, listening to any movement. Nothing. It was always like this and it was killing you inside secretly, no matter how much you said that you enjoyed the indoors thoroughly.

You were born for adventure and made into a coward. You had to stop.

Hissing against the thought, you paused at the nearest 'Exit', considering your options,you shaft was almost over, and your time to depart would be soon. You checked your watch, 20:29. A minute. Your hand reached for the door,heart hammering against your rib-cage at the thought of stepping outside. You had in over two months, and you body was struggling to keep healthy. You were struggling to keep sane, you realized.

20:30.The watched as the time turned over. You pressed against the hand,allowing the door to open, cool air caressed your face, and tears stung your eyes. With shaking knees you stepped forward, your hair untangling and tangling against the breeze, goosebumps traveling down you back, at it's familiar touch.

Stepping cautiously out, you braced for anything, the whistle of bombs screeching up ahead. You ducked inside, eyes watering, but the damage was done.The bombs land, rocking you from your feet at the memory. You tumbled to the ground, refusing the fact that you weeping from your own cruelty. You had it bad.

The vision repeated and then was gone, leaving you sobbing silently on the cool ground,the cool breeze reaching through your clothing and cooling you heating body. Minutes passed and the watched beeped again. 21:00.

Biting your lips against the pity that crawled up into your throat, you struggled to stand again, heaving yourself up against the door frame, and watching the night sky, that mimicked the night of the attack. You closed your eyes, stepping out, willing your mind strength, as you shakily stepped onto the soft sand of the earth you had band from yourself.You sob at the contact. Falling numbly onto your knees again, you opened your eyes, cupping the sand in your palm before allowing it to fall through your shaking fingers. It was nothing how your remembered it. Tumbling down the steep, you skidded to a halt, just beyond the Garrison, heart racing and lungs short of breath.

I can do this.

And you believed it. You smiled, tears coming anew as you stood within the stand, the wind tugging at your loose strands of hair. You counted the seconds and turned back to the school. You would return the next and the next. 


	2. Chapter Two:Passive's Body

It was getting easier, you realized, as you stepped somewhat confidently onto the sand, months after the the first time in attempting to see the open world. The other Commanders and teachers didn't know of you might get a ways, and you willed it to stay that way.

You didn't want them to think that you were nuts.

Reaching the ledge,you had become familiar with you, sat down, rapping your jacket closer to your shoulders as you considered the stars. Nothing happened. You almost wept with joy.

Maybe you could recover after all, after all it did require patience and it had taken you months to get this far. Slowly and surly, you reasoned with yourself each night, glad that you made that first step. Glad you had down something, beyond schoolwork. Drawing patterns lazily in the sand, you felt your body relax fully, at the familiar night sounds and area. You were safe.

I had always been safe.

The thought dampened your mood. Cussing to yourself, you rolled onto your knees and stood, brushing the sand from the folds of your clothes. The wind gently rolled past you, whispering against the sands, through it's plains and cutting around the School  that stood isolated. Running over the ridges and walkways.

All was quite.Peaceful. And safe, your mind chirped defiantly to yourself,your face twisted with the reminder, wrapping your arms around yourself as you watched the starry nights, come to it's full glory.You sighed through your nose, eyes reflecting over the glowing night,eyes glistening with tears of shame, you bowed your head as a tear rolled down you face and dropped onto your uniform of the army –something that you wished never happened.

"Attention students, This is not a drill. We are on lock down-" Iverson's voice spoke over the loudspeaker, dragging you from your thoughts,completely rooting you to the ground. "-Security situation Zulu Niner. Repeat: all students are to remain in barracks until further notice." You knew fully well that you weren't a student, but the didn't help the sense of panic set in, or the confusion that followed. You jolted out of your position, gathering what wits remained, and scanned the skies. A objects plummeted towards Earth,you squinted, dropping to a knee, in a defensive position, before you could register what you were doing. The object wasn't gaining speed,and appeared constant in it's fast rate. No Meteor then. A spacecraft.

Forcing yourself back onto you feet, your sense of panic returning as the sirens wailed. You lungs tightened, and with every ounce of willpower you pushed yourself up the steep, calf's straining as you watched the Garrsion's front. Figures moved against the starry night.

Halting quietly,your eyes scanned the three individuals that dropped from the Garrison's front and move away. You knew those postures. The tightness threatened to crush your throat. Wheezing you doubled over,images flashing against your eyes. You groaned, sinking to a knee.

Calm. One... two... three. Repeat.

You straightened weakly, eyes feeling heavy as you fought back tears of anxiety. I won't allow this to take over me – again. You had to get those kids back into barracks. You had to. An explosion erupted loudly back towards the Camp. The sound caused you to reel over and still.Moments pasted and sobbing you heaved yourself up, heart hammering and tears staining your cheeks, as the images threatened to flood your eyes, the sounds echoing in your hollow mind. Echoing, echoing,echoing...

Pushing yourself back down the steep, you half slid, half stumbled to your destruction on a rocky steep, standing straight against the dark night as you watched the three ascending into the camp and specialists of both war, science and doctoring. You felt your eyes widen, in realization.Swearing like a male solider, you followed, legs straining against so much movement, in so much little time.You were out of shape, for obvious reasons, but your muscles would have to remember quickly, you thought as you pushing your way into a tent, then material cool against your clumpy hand. Pushing yourself further inside, you drew to a halt at the sight of Lance, Hunk and Pidge. Lance rushed forward to... Keith, who supported a man. You stopped at the doorway, your mouth drying, "What are you doing?" You rasped,

Lance paused,guiding the man's arms around his shoulder. He blinked rapidly, "Ms.L/N!" He yelped, astonished, before any other student could utter another word.

You managed a sound in your throat, looking doubtful, "Huh... what are you doing?"You repeated, voice growing firmer, glad that you sounded stronger than you probably looked.

Keith sighed in frustration, "Let us leave, we have to go." He suggested through gritted teeth.

You licked your lips, "Kids..." you tried lamely, "what...?" You stepped forward, pushing pasted Hunk and Pidge that didn't have the heart to stop you. You peered at the man's face, who hang low, white and black hair moped over his forehead, hiding his features in shadow. "Who?"Why?

But the names were already on your lips. Shiro. You stepped aside, a frown creasing on your face. It seemed automatic, like your passiveness had become apart of you, made you acceptable to others. The thought sickened you, but you didn't move.

The two boys dragged the unconscious man through the passage and out into the darkness. Hunk paused, looking at you with guilt, "Sorry Ms."

I'm sorry too.

You forced a shakily smile to your lips, "Go Hunk." He followed Pidge out. You stood frozen, clutching your fists, in frustration as Iverson entered the room, his face glowing with anger. You winced as his eyes landed on you, "Commander L/N," He greeted coldly, lips twisting into a snarl, "you didn't stop them!?" He sneered,

You licked your lips again, lip trembling, "You were lucky I made it outside."You were surprised that it came out cold and low, your fist still clutched.

He snorted, before hurriedly leaving, to give pursuit. You numbly followed him out,squinting against the cruel light that now was trained on the tent entrance. You ducked away, aware of a few curious glances thrown your way, through the panic that Shiro had been taken – by students nonetheless.

You followed Commander Iverson's trail at a jog and stopped at vehicles lining up,without further thinking you swung into the nearest one, heart racing again as you ran your hand over the stirring wheel. Pressing your forehead on the wheel, you collected your thoughts, fingers numbly working at the cables underneath, hot-wiring the machine into a start.It hummed. Straightening with fright, you put it into gear, lip trembling again and you backed it. The pursuit wasn't too far ahead,you'd be able to catch up. Maybe...

Taking a shaky breath, you followed the lights across the plain, hands unsteady. The engine roared as you allowed it to go full capacity, quickly catching up, adrenaline running faster than your heart. Hands sweaty as you gripped the wheel.

The only reason,you knew, that you caught up was that they didn't want to hurt Shiro or the students (ex or not) and simply wanted to cut them off, Keith was making sure to keep his head in the situation. Flying onto a ridge, you came abreast with them, passing the outline and to the front, edging Keith off the pathway, hoping he could handle the situation with reasonable ease. You guided the vehicle before the Jeeps, it's wheel spinning and locking, dust raising up to meet you.Something drove you, and you knew it was wrong – somehow. The two Jeeps collided with your know, tipping it. Jolting forward, you unlocked the stirring wheel, and clasped onto the floor of the vehicle. You believed that's what saved you in the end. The car groaned as it toppled over the edge, cutting across ridges, before landing hard, the body crippled. You lay unconsciousness before the machine touched the ground.

-

"Ms. L/N!" A voice called, distant and in the dark. "Ms. L/N!"

You woke later,waves of pain drifting to you. You groaned weakly. "Ms. L/N!"The voice was nearer, and footsteps were audible, as they approached the wrecking Jeep. "Ms. L/N?" Lance's voice cried out as he drew to the driver's seat. You were too numb with pain to answer, drifting painfully between reality and darkness. The pain couldn't be felt in the darkness, you knew. Hands grabbed at you, harshly, pulling your from the floor, pulling you into the dry desert land. You drifted into oblivion.

-

The pain awoke you,you lay motionless, as voice's surrounded you, drifting in and out of earshot. "Where am I?" You managed through a perched throat, eyes slitting open painfully. A headache immediately attack you, but it was nothing like your legs, you let out a muffled groan as the pain became more apparent.

Hunk was at your side in a instant, "Ms. L/N!" He cried, immediately drawing a flask to your lips, the other hand, supporting your head.

You drunk deeply,unsatisfied when he pulled it away, other faces leaning over the table. Lance was to draw you into a furious hug, "I'm so glad you're alright!"

Keith crossed his arms, "She's not alright." He pointed out bluntly, eyes he watched Lance gently release his teacher, tenderly, confirming Keith's words.

Lance directed a pointed glare at his rival, "She'll be fine." He assured everyone– mostly himself.

You groaned, before soft laughter fall from you mouth, shocking the four teenagers, "Wow,I am out of my mind. What happened?" You didn't bother to assess your injuries – you didn't want to. It'll only cause panic and panic got you... well you known.

Hunk answered, "You flew off the edge!" he supplied 'helpfully', resulting in an annoyed glance from Pidge. Pidge supplied more, "Your Jeep crashed,we only found you a few hours ago, you've been out since then."

You swallowed,breath catching in your throat, your mind going to your injuries, you heart rate speeding at the immobilized legs. You couldn't move them.But thankfully you could feel them, the pain drifting in waves –they had drugged you, you noticed as a side thought. Broken. Panic coarse through you, the last time you had been this seriously injured was- you shook your head stopping the thought, mouth dry again. Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god- Stop!

The four pupils leans forward, over you at your silence. You blinked rapidly, "How bad?" You coaxed out of your tight throat, eyes stinging. You weren't going to cry in front of students. You needed to get a hold of your panic. You barely held yourself together as Lance answered quickly, not helping you nerves, at his own panicked tone, "Quite...bad." The students seemed to sink in – all but Keith who pulled away, looking across the room.

"Guys, give her space." A new voice instructed, kindly. The three drew away,quickly. You relaxed again, unsure when you had tensed. You winced as you tired to draw yourself onto your elbows. Hunk assisted you into a sitting posture, as you fought yourself to keep awake. Spots clustered in your vision.

What seemed like minutes, you were finally seating, glazing over to Takashi Shirogane,who meet your eyes. You had ever meet him in person, but did hear of his mission-gone-wrong – who hadn't? Obviously you were curious about what happened, and went through ideas what had happened – but about then you were suffering your own pain – everything was just a blur.

You offered a grateful smile, "Thank you," You cleared your throat, before repeating yourself, "thank you," you managed more clearly. You weakly held out a hand, "I don't believe we have met." You tried,trying your best to appear stronger than you were.

He stepped forward,clasping you hand, a soft smile curling on his lips, "Takashi Shirogane, but just call me Shiro."

You felt yourself smiling, against the pain, against your weakness, "Y/N L/N."


	3. Chapter Three:Life's Reality

The painkillers drew you back under, into the darkness that couldn't be touched by your pain. No nightmares haunted you, nor dreams, just the dark obit of nothing. You liked to think it was space, but you saw no stars or planets. And so you remained, for how long you didn't know and when you awoke, you wished that you would return.

You moaned as the pain hit you like a brick, you were prodded up on pillows, and blanket thrown over you, the five individuals knelt beside the couch, Shiro's finger brushing over your prodded up left leg. It dawned on you – had they set it back already or...?

You hoped so.

As though reading your mind, Shiro spoke, cutting through the silence, “We set them yesterday, when you were out to it.” You felt yourself relax, going over the correct angle of the leg and realized your fear was misplaced. Lance and Hunk looked over, looking relieved at your wakefulness.

You managed a small smile in return, “What time is it?” You asked, you voice sounding strained.

Pidge checked his watch, “5:39, positively morning.”

You sighed as you sunk into the pillows, minding working, feeling as though you had under-slept – even though you knew damn well that you had overslept. Injuries did that to you, you assured yourself, as you felt your eyelids drooped. You fought to keep awake, “Then what are you doing to my leg?” You asked suddenly, causing Hunk to jump.

Shiro seemed unfazed by the sudden noise, “Checking to see if anything is wrong.” He answered, calmly, looking up and giving you a assured smile, “and if I could do anything to assess.”

You offered his a sheepish smile, fully relaxing into the soft pillows that supported your head, “Thank you – again.”

Keith watched you from the table, sitting back to front staring at you intently, “Why did you help?”

Your sheepish smile remained, as you looked at you teenager. Why had I helped? You found that you didn't know the answer. You shrugged, “I don't know, if I'm honest,” You replied truthfully, “I just did.”

Keith's eyes narrowed, “You helped us because you could?”

Lance sighed heavily, “She couldn't, but she did.” He drooled out, smirking smugly, still watched Shiro, allowing himself to give his rival a quick look of victory.

You felt your lips tug into a general smile, at their normal behavior. At everyone's behavior that seemed to say they had done this for years – even though it had only been a night. “I did it,” you started firmly, “because the Galaxy Garrsion have been my cage, I didn't know what I could do, how much I could... reteach myself,” you shook your head, feeling upset strangely, “something made me stand aside.”

It was a stupid notion to think of something so childish – but some instinct within you told you to back down – then stand up and fight. This is what it probably feels to recover, you thought bitterly.

Hunk sighed heavily, sitting on the armrest, “Would you go back?” To the Garrsion... It was simple, of course you would, you would face your action, get fired and then be ported back to your hometown where you could try and rebuild the broken pieces. It was a punishment to be sent back into isolation of the big wide world, and they would know, it'll kill you to be thrown completely out of Care. You would take it though, it was you fault you acted out.

Unless of course they thought you were completely nuts and had you put under Care for a good portion of the day. You blinked rapidly, noticing the stares as they waited for an answer, “I'd be fired.” You admitted, “taken home most likely.” You squinted, sun-ray's casting into your vision. You held your hand up to cover your watering eyes.

Pidge brow creased with worry, “As far as they are concerned, you helped kidnap an defenseless individual,” he sighed, mumbling the last under his breath, “not matter how much he can clearly take care of himself.”

“I've dealt with things worst than accusation, Pidge. I'll be fine.” You assured, as Shiro stood over you, offering relief from your eyes from the direction of the sun as it passed into your eyes. You were thankful once more – even though he was unintentionally helping you.

The four teenagers seemed doubtful at the least, Lance being the more faithful, you shifted under their glaze, cheeks reddening. Why didn't anyone believe you when you said that?

Shiro spoke, his voice breaking the silence, “You need to be taken to the hospital, your injuries assessed professionally, they can't lay crimes on you until they are sure how extensive you injuries are and why. They don't,” he cleared his throat, “excuse me – like to accuse an unstable individual in case their condition worsens, resulting in death or other serious issues, that could back fire on themselves.” he stated simply, prodding you up on the pillows.

He had a point, you thought vaguely, nodding to his words, agreeing with him, “I'll think of something through that time,” You watched as Shiro received a glass of water, handing it to you. You flashed him a grateful smile, before changing the subject, drawing the doubtful and concerned younger members attention away from you, “now if you don't mind me asking, why Keith did you receive Shiro away from the Garrison. And why were you, Lance, Hunk and Pidge doing out of barraks at that time?” You felt your lips draw into a thin line, eyebrow raising.

Pidge, Hunk and Lance rushed to answer quickly, offering a only a mixture of words, confusing you further.

“Huh.” You managed, earning an amused glance from Shiro.

Keith answered after the three quietened, directing glares at each other, “I've been getting these readings-” he didn't explain further, into 'readings', as he continued, “each had been leading up to the arrival of Shiro last night – though I did know it was him. It just read an arrival, and something about: Voltron.”

Your brow creased, though you knew fully well that you shouldn't ask for more than that, after all this was none of your concern – even through you went over a cliff for them – it was you choice, not their's. Your problem not their's. You nodded, accepting the facts.

Anyway you wouldn't be much help anyway.

You nodded again, this time firmly, “Alright then, makes some sort of sense, with a bit of imagination involved,” you smiled to assure that you meant no offence. You didn't, but it did seem a little absurd – not that you had never believed in the sort of stuff – something inside you still wanted to believe and did, reasoning that either way weather Earth was alone in the stars or had company, both possibilities were terrifying. But then you just couldn't allow yourself to tumble into believing fortunetelling, and such like.

You just couldn't. “Now that is cleared up, I want to asked how to get to the Garrison. Keith's transport would be enough, if you drop me off near a ridge, they are bound to find me, they'll be looking for you runaways, anyway.” It was sensible and logical.

Keith nodded, “I can do that.”

You nodded your thanks, before wincing as you pulled yourself fully up into a sitting position, “The quicker I get leaving, the quicker you guys get back to your, readings and what not.” You sent the three pupils an exaggerated look of disdain, but grew serious, “after all, there is a reason to everything, and whatever the reason, you guys have been drawn together – you'd be kick out of the Academy to say the least, Lance, Pidge and Hunk. Keith you can do as you please. And Shiro I believe you are capable of handling yourself. I can't stop you decisions.”

The group remained quite, Shiro talking first, “Then thank you, Keith will make sure you are found within a reasonable time and taken in.” It was done, you were going to face your other consequences. You stared at you immobile legs and thought that bitterly that this was just the start to another horrible chapter of your life – even though a few blessed the pages, it was a pretty crap story.

-

Shiro was the person to carry you out, meekly towards your ride, cautiously carrying you out into the open. You squinted against the harsh light, desperately trying to recover, you pain in your legs momentarily forgotten as you fought down tears.

This was your first time outside, during the day for... you didn't even know anymore.

You didn't realize how significant it was, until it dawned on you. Rubbing your eyes furiously, you were vaguely aware of Shiro pausing as he looked down at you, “Are you alright?” He asked cautiously, frowning with concern as he watched you fight back tears.

You groaned, digging the heels of you palms into your eyes, feeling your cheeks burning. “This is my first time outside during the day, since... I dunno.” You replied truthfully, drawing your hands away from you eyes, disgusted to see moisture being left behind by your tears. You felt his grasp lessen, as he gently placed you to the ground, sitting you in the sunlight. Your legs were throbbing in pain, but you didn't care, the bright blue sky... the clouds that ranged across the horizon... the heat the burned on your face as the air tugged at your hair. The feeling of soil against your fingers tips, as you reached forward, gathering hot sand into your palms, before allowing it to fall back onto the ground.

Dust rose to your nostrils, causing you to sneeze. Unaware of Shiro watching your enthusiastic gestures, you laughed, eyes watery at the assault of dust.

The sun's touch warmed you skin, caressing your obvious pale skin, from lack of sun that you had received.

You promised that you would never do that to yourself again.

The spell was broken as the attractive man gathered you back into his arms, gingerly. You cradled up to his chest warily, “Thank you,” You mumbled, truly grateful, eyes drooping to the rhythm of his steps.

His soft laughter followed, “Now don't fall asleep on me, Y/N. I'd only have to wake you back up again.”

You yawned, “I know, I know,” You muttered, knowing fully well that Shiro didn't want to seem so transparent. He had drugged your glass of water, with painkillers and sleeping pills. He wanted you to be out to it, before the Garrsion found you. For your own safety reasons, although he didn't tell you, afraid that you might take it the wrong way. You didn't though, it wasn't anything personal.

You had also heard how genuine the man was, in conversations. He seemed like a top star, perfect – almost. You didn't believe everything you had held about the Pilot that got lost out in space – why would you? - and yet a lot of them seemed to match the owner.

Although you had to admit, that some rumors were far-fetched.

Your eyelids drooped one last time, before you fall into a dreamless sleep, before Shiro handed you over to Keith.


	4. Chapter Four:Brother's Friend

You weren't aware when Keith found a suitable area to lay you down – just off the Garrison. You wren't aware when they found your body, or when they brought you in. You just remember waking to the beeping of the heart monitor.

Beep, beep, beep, beep.

No one was there to greet you as you awoke, nor hours after. You just lay there, glancing out the window, eyes glassy as you imagined with the five individuals were doing and mulling over your own problem. Nothing came to you – but you knew you would come up with something soon, even if it was weak.

You didn't care what would happen next. You were content in just thinking about your recovery. It'll take awhile for you to get back onto your feet – literally, you thought lamely. You at least had a week to recover, before they started laying on the accusations, as Shiro said, they don't want to hold blame for decreasing health. So a week they would wait until they understood that you were stable and able to take you own. That was if you played unstable for a couple of days, they'd leave you alone for maybe a while longer.

But Doctor's couldn't hold off the visitor's for long.

You sighed, you head still bound and slow – from heavy painkillers, you decided, sluggishly. Your thought's were so frustratingly slow! Your movements even slower! You forced your body to relax, eyes burning into the only door in the room. It slide up and shut and could only do so with an I.D card, that each nurse and doctor wore, clipped to their shirt.

Lazily you peered around the room, even through of your condition, you had never been in a room like this. This room as three camera's on each wall of the oddly shaped room, what was stuck between a square and a triangle. The room was dim – the lights lining the ceiling.

It was as though they tried to make everything different, like they... didn't want to trigger me.

You froze, the truth dawning of you. They thought you were crazy, your disorder making you do things that you normally wouldn't do. They probably thought that the alarms from the other night had set you off completely, and made you go against you usual behaviour.

But Commander Iverson had seen you after.

The explanation made no sense, but that was the only thing that justified the room's odd architecture.

The door slide up with a hiss, you felt your chest tighten as it revealed a man you use to be close with, a man you trusted dearly, but you pushed him away after... his best friends death. He had become something like a brother, you had often thought before the bombing, something that would remain with you until the end.

How wrong those thoughts were.

You body went rigid, breathing going unsteady as you tumbled into the images you had managed to avoid. His golden hair, blue friendly eyes, and a dusting of facial hair on his chin, tucked underneath the helmet. His lips were pressed into grimace as he swung his gun onto his shoulder... the image was gone, as he stepped further in, seemingly snapping you out of your dangerous trace.

You snapped your mouth shut as Joey Jones, stepped in, looking imposing in his ironed uniform, his rank pinned on his chest. You couldn't hate sight of a man so much. He spoke first, his voice was roughed than you remembered it – probably from yelling over the gunfire, “Don't worry, the sight of you isn't exactly the easiest either.”

You straightened, grimace at the sharp pain your legs provided from the movement. Trying to collect you muddled thoughts, you scowled, your words slightly slurred, “Then why did you come?”

He chuckled, drawing up a seat next to your bed, amused. You didn't have the willpower to scream at him to get out. “The drugs aren't doing you any good are they?”

You must look wild enough for Joey 'Joy', the happiest man on Earth to make a comment like that.

You sighed, slumping into the pillows, trying to hide from him. Though you could still hear his voice – so his face would have to do. Your silence was enough.

“They never did much for me either, made me lazy and tired. I refuse them now, much to everyone else's despair.” He commented almost absentmindedly,

“I'm not drugged up because of that,” you mumbled, drawing the duvet up and above your face, burying you in sheets and feather pillows. “I refuse them too, once I did...” The medication did work, it shut off the responsive system in your brain, that made your reflects one to zero, and you capability of movement slow and poor judgement.

“And you're rather teach a class, then not be able to do nothing.” Joey supplied for you helpfully,

You pulled the streets off you head, glaring at him. “You are just here for a nice talk, Joey, why are you truly here for?” You hated yourself for being so hateful to him, last time you parted ways with him, you parted in good terms, but a haunting image of the past seemed to be much more painful than you had first thought.

Joey's mouth drooped, eyes sad: you probably look like something like this, you thought, “Y/N...” he started softly, leaning forward, thumb tracing over your jaw. You flinched at the contact. He draw away, looking even more disheartened, “they wanted me to ask you what had happened two nights ago.”

Two nights ago...

A bitter taste evolved at the back of your throat, as you considered the man before you. You forced yourself to soften you glaze, as you managed a lazy roll of you shoulders. The silence dragged on as you tried to think up and reasonable answer, you went with the most truthful one you could think of, “I was trying to get better, so I out in the dunes, it took me awhile to reach that ledge. I was watching the stars and Shiro's spacecraft came into the atmosphere. The alarms started to wail and I panicked...” you trailed off, gathering more your your story up into your lips, “three students were going down to the Site, it was out of curiosity, I'm guessing. They meant no harm-”

“-They kidnapped Shiro.” Joey injected softly, cutting off you story.

You scuffled, “Excuse you,” you slurred before you were registering what was coming out of your mouth, “if you think you know my story better than myself, then please do tell the media and whatnot. I don't care.”

He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, a red hue dusting his cheeks, “Sorry, Y/N, please continue.”

He meant no harm, you decided soundly, he could've taken that and twisted it. He was content to your story. You nodded, sending his an unsure glance, “I was panicked, but I rashly thought to get them back in-dorms. I went after them, they were in the tent and I froze... I couldn't do anything. I was completely useless...” you breathing caught at the back of your thought and actual tears stung your eyes, as you story evolved. “They left – they are good kids, Joey. Real good kids – they explained the Shiro was struggling against the restraints as the Garrison tried to put him under-” you explained, hoping that it made some sort of sense, not realizing how close to the truth it was, “they thought he was in distress and took him. Commander Iverson came in, scowling me. I felt bad and gave chase, following them. Something triggered and I jerked the stirring wheel the wrong way and I tumbled off the cliff.” The story ended, giving you a sense of what seemed like smugness.

You were satisfied with it.

But then again, all Joey had to do was go to the Doctors that assessed Shiro, and her story was untruthful – but then again, it could be the students told her untruthful information, that her story was still stable. As far as you were concerned, you managed a somewhat flawless story on the top of your mind.

Joey's eyes narrowed, as he watched you immediate reaction after. When he found no guilt he sighed, “It sounds truthful,” he admitted,

You dabbed your watery eyes, “Why wouldn't it be? I'm telling the truth.” And that was a lie.

Joey leaned forward again, cupping your chin, forcing you to look back at him. His eyes were so truthful – no matter the bad feelings you felt for him now, you knew he was grow back onto you and you would feel guilty for the rest of your life. “Where were you after the crash?” He asked,

You struggled to appear relaxed in his hand, licking your lips, and brow creasing. “I don't rightly remember a lot, though I think the students collected me, and brought me back into a stabler condition – as I have already said, they meant no harm – after they gave me painkillers, on the ride back I- I fall asleep,” you felt your cheeks burn, it was real embarrassment there, “I was exhausted from my injuries and the painkillers,” - and sleeping pills, you didn't add - “I was out to it, I only just recently woke up.” That much was true, you thought bitterly.

Joey's other hand, brushed free strands of hair away from your sickly looking face, his lip drooping into a pout, “Are you sure they meant no harm?”

You sighed, drawing away from his grasp, “Yes, they helped me and returned me. They meant no harm.”

“But Shiro-!” The blond man interjected again,

You shook you head, trying to hide you disdain... it didn't work. “I think, Shiro is capable of handing himself.”

Joey's eyes narrowed again, his bright blue eyes growing darker, “Y/N, he has been missing for a year, he probably isn't strong enough to contest, you must know this.” He was testing you, you knew, meeting his determined glaze.

“I saw his briefly, Joey. He was strong enough to take care of himself, he was accompanied with the students as you and I use to be.”

He snorted, standing, “I want to believe you, Y/N-”

“Then believe me,” you cut him off, calmly, surprised by the behaviour. “Believe the truth. No matter how much you remind me of my painful times, and how much I feel sick looking at your handsome face, I will never lie to you. You were a friend to my brother, Joey. You were a friend to me. I don't lie to people that I respect. I respect you – respect me.”

He looked doubtful, but defeated, instead of offering words of anger, he knelt beside the bed, taking your hands in his, “Y/N,” his voice was attentive, tender and loving. Something you had missed. “I hope you wouldn't lie to me. I believe you, I will always believe you, even if you lied in front of the truth – I would believe you. Please respect me.”

This conversation coming to a close, a ending you were glad to see coming. You nodded, “Of coarse.” You managed, breathlessly.

Then he left, standing onto his feet and straightening, looming over your bedside, eyes drifting to yours. He looked defeated, broken and lost, you wanted to tell him the truth, but that'll only bring trouble. You sunk into the pillows again, knowing fully well, that no matter what Joey had said on your behalf, they would still come. They will still accuse and bait.

You needed an escape fast. An idea. But nothing would come to you.

Shamefully, you curled up, pulling the sheets back over your head knowing fully well that this track only lead to two paths. Prison or a life full of drugs and security. Dread crashed you, there was no returning home and trying to rebuild your life back up, as you had regularly hoped for...

Your freedom was slipping away fast after you had just found it again. You wept.


	5. Chapter Five - Freedom's Breath

Nights passed and interviews seemed endless beyond comprehension. You had thought they'd give you a week, but you were wrong. The very next day after Joey had left, the Head's of the Committee came in, followed by curious Spokesmen, and media. And as the second week came into view, you knew you freedom was completely gone.

Often you would refuse to say anything, other times you would repeat the same story you had told Joey, sometimes giving false memories as you had claimed you had witnessed between pain and oblivion – other times you would tell them to leave. You knew it wouldn't matter either way.

You knew you were doomed and so accepted it. At nights you thought about the five individuals, four of them had attended your class at one point, one you had never meet before – which bothered you, as you constantly thought on the man you had meet briefly.

His gentle eyes and serious manner.

What had happened? He had been missing for a year and then he turns up, drawing the four young individual's to him. How had it happened?

Most importantly: _Why?_

You didn't really believe in fate, but Keith had mentioned something about Shiro's arrival through readings – and Voltron. What is important here?

The questions would often float in your mind, as you tried to sort through information, thinking up theories until you felt like you had gotten somewhere and the idea would be completely lost. You simply didn't know enough, you thought as you let out a frustrated grunt as the thought slipped – again. But that didn't stop you.

You believed it was boredom that made you cause your excessive thinking, that and you actually wanted to come across as a woman in distress. Things were easier if they thought you were mad. Complicated if they thought you were stable.

To you dismay you were traveling down the familiar path of despair and thoughts of passive behaviour. Your healing coming undone and you were back again.

You had given up on anything good happening, Joey visited regularly, much to your distaste, as you realized you were only being tested again. And so a cycle was unintentionally put into place. At night you would remain awake and in the day you would fight with heavy eyelids and endless questions.

You hadn't said a truthful story in seven days, the thought brought a bitter taste to your tongue and a feeling of drowning overtake you. You become what you said, you had often quoted, when your friends had jokingly said: You are what you eat.

You eat lies from other individuals, and swallow them. That makes you a lie. And so you tell lies. It was in human behaviour to lie and there was no way out of it.

You overthinking everything, but it was true to a certain degree. Everything that everyone was true in a way. So you guess you weren't lying really.

These thoughts played in your mind, at you had almost conceived yourself that you were mad. You had lost yourself in an act, and once you had realized you had cried and promised to sleep at night and talk through the day – that was as the second week drifted in. You weren't going to break.

Sighing as you painfully shifted in your bed,, you legs not yet fully healed, you allowed yourself to relax, mind playing over marching rhythms – that surprisingly helped you drift yourself off to sleep, and ground you. _Left, right, left..._

-

You awoke with a start, body frozen, ear struggling to listen to the noise that had originally awoken you. _Snap!_ Click, click...

“ _Shhhhhh_!” A voice hissed, “Geez, Keith you'd think someone was actually trying to break in!” Lance's voice drooled out in a harsh whisper.

“We are breaking in!” Keith sneered, in a low whisper.

You froze at the familiar voices, as the two approached with reasonable cautious to your bed, their footsteps giving away their position. You sighed, “Won't you be spotted?”

Lance yelped, but Keith managed to keep composed. “It's already been organised,” he explained smoothly, reaching for you shoulder, and gently rolling you onto your back. You groaned, eyes taking in the two familiar faces, who looked hopefully down at you.

You looked back, “What are you doing?” You managed hoarsely,

Lance smirked, “Come to break you out of here!” He exclaimed in a low voice, his words catching in excitement. You frowned as Keith helped you sit up, in the bed, guiding your legs over the bedside – which you were grateful for. You mind tried to process the information.

_How were they getting me out? Why?_

There were to many questions, so you shook your head and concentrated on the task at hand. You knew they meant good by breaking you out, but that put them in danger. You hissed, “Why are you doing this?”

Keith gave a lazy shrug of his shoulders, straightening his back. Before he could answer though Lance was already forming a sentence, “You helped us didn't you?” You nodded meekly – what if this was a cruel joke? - you refrained from thinking so. “So we help you.” He explained,

You licked your lips, “Alright then, fine.” You collected your already travail thoughts, breathing deep as you heart pounded painfully in your stomach. Your anxiety was arising again to full vengeance. Calm. Breath. In...out...in...out...

Strangely, the two boys put on helmets, Lance with blue and Keith with red. You frowned, “What-?”

Keith sighed, “Explain later.” He instructed, voice steady. You swallowed but nodded weakly, as you took in the helmets again. Hurriedly you reached forward onto the bedside table, clasping your most previous item you owned. The necklace your brother brought you for your 21st birthday, last year. You had asked for Joey to collected it from your rooms, hoping to get him out of the room. It had worked and he returned briefly to give it to you. You hadn't allowed it from your sight since. It was a pretty opal, in a shape of a tear, handing of a thin silver chain. It was simple, but your's. You nodded, quickly.

Keith was the first to put your hand over his shoulder, Lance crossed his arms, “I thought we were going to do the chair.”

Keith blinked rapidly, giving a withered look, “A chair?”

Lance nodded quickly, “You know, you put your hands on my arms, and we create a pattern strong enough to make a chair for Ms. L/N to sit on.” He explained to the frowning boy.

Keith shrugged again, but his eyes were burning a fiery storm, “No chair, that'll waste a hand and Ms. L/N's comfort-”

“And you think walking is more comfortable than sitting – you my friend have priorities issues.” Lance snapped his fingers, causing you and Keith to roll your eyes.

Keith's face twisted in frustration, “Her bones were broken up the leg, closer to the hip, you idiot! It's healing but appalling pressure could still be uncomfortable. We are supporting her on her feet, so it's not so daunting. Yes, it'll be more comfortable than your chair!”

Lance blinked and you felt the argument come in full circle, “My chair? Excuse me, that's childhood's chair!”

Keith mouth opened, probably to mutter a 'whatever', you cut the two boy's off, “Just do as Keith says, Lance.” You mumbled, you voice sounding a tired as you felt.

Lance's shoulders slumped, but he obeyed, slinging your arm over his own shoulders, you forced on the escape they had cut. The window that had a white paint over, to block any source of light going through, had been removed and put cautiously to the side. You felt your eyes sting with tears. Outside the damage, the starry night winked back at you. You fought down a sob as the two boys helped you over to the escape root that they had cut – how you didn't know.

“On the countdown of three, you try and jump, okay?” He managed through gritted teeth, you nodded, eyes fixed on the stars. “One... two...” he nodded to Lance, “ _Three_.” You forced pressure into the heels, and tried your best to jump as the boy;s heaved you over the window sill. Their pressure lessened and you dropped with a yelp, falling onto your back. You looked up, you injuries throbbing painfully.

Keith and Lance peered over the hole, “We could've done better,” Lance admitted, climbing out first, gingerly helping you to your feet. Keith was there in a moment, slinging your other arm around your shoulders.

Grimace, you allowed them to drag you down further away from the Galaxy Garrison, each individual tiring as the went through hard sandy grounds. You were the first to crumple, cussing under your breath. Lance paused, “You are Ms. L/N, right?” He asked, looking uncertain through his helmet.

You frowned, “Yes I am.” You managed through heavy breaths, feet sore against the softness of the sand, only now aware of the bareness of your feet.

Lance shrugged, “Never heard you swear before.” He commented casually, breath hitching in his throat showing signs of him tiring. You wouldn't blame him.

“Also... there...” Keith huffed out, allowing both you and Lance to sigh in relief, as they staggered down a ledge, and in-behind a bolder.

You grasped, you body freezing as the mechanical object loomed over head. It's yellow eyes dimmed and seemingly watching. Keith tugged you forward, as panic started to weigh heavy in your throat, “What is that?” You grasped, struggling against his grasp. Was that a lion? Lance sighed, stopping for you, allowing you to lean on him as you fought control over yourself, “Is that a mechanical lion?” You breathed, eyes wide.

Keith gave up too, nodding, “Yes and nothing to be afraid of.”

You snorted, “Well yes, isn't that obvious,” you retorted lamely, surprising Lance with you sarcasm – and Keith.

Keith blinked, unsure how to answer the sarcastic comment. “....Yes.”

You mind whirred, “Is that something to do with Voltron?” You asked lamely, as you allowed the boys to half carry you, half lead you towards the massive thing. There was something intelligent about the thing that made you nervous, like it could think for itself.

The boys did answer, as they stopped metres from it. The mechanical thing moved. Robot then, you adjusted, stiffening. Bending it's head down, it's jaw open, revealing a walkway open inside the robotic lion. You swallowed again at you dry mouth, as the boys supported you to the walkway, remaining quite until they stepped onto the platform. “Yes,” Keith answered, “it has something to do with Voltron.”


	6. Chapter Six - Kindness's Grasp

They guided you further in, where Pidge was seated regally up on the only chair, squinting at the three of you quizzically. You managed a weak smile in his direction, “Hey Pidge.” You greeted, you voice hoarse, as you took in the other individual that were standing next to the obvious control chair – Hunk.. You had never been so glad to see anyone in your entire life.

“Hi Hunk,” You grasped, as Hunk beelined to you before wrapping you in a tight embrace. You grasped against it, struggling to breath, “Hunk!” You grasped, slapping him weakly on the back, “Can't... _breath_...” he let go, a wide smile lighting up his face.

“Ms. L/N!” He greeted finally, helping you regain your balance. You don't remember the last time you were greeted like this. Maybe two years, or three...

You yelped as Pidge collided with you, tipping you off balance. You staggered, before Lance caught you, by the collar and kept you on your feet.

You returned the tiny boy's embrace, “Pidge.” You wheezed. “I'm glad you are okay.” He mumbled into your hospital gown. You chuckled, feeling your cheeks burn at you attire.

You gently pushed the teenager away, cheeks reddening. “Oh good,” You mumbled into your hands, “didn't have chance...” you explained, as it dawned on the four individuals in the room. There was a mumble of apologizes, which was returned by your own. You shuttered as Keith slung his jacket over your shoulders.

Then their attire hit you. You were too busy walking in pain that you hadn't noticed the armor they wore, so casually. You frowned, “Okay kids, what is happening here?” You smiled gratefully at Keith, and tugged the jacket closer, very aware that he was probably the only one to think of your dressing and so brought something more useful.

Pidge seated himself back into the control seat, tapping at the control panel, acting as though he hadn't heard, Hunk rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly and Lance whistled, Keith remained silent, staring at you intently.

Finally one of them broke the silence. It was Lance.

“It's a long story, but first we have to get out of here.” He tapped Pidge's shoulder, indicating that he should get a move on.

Keith gently nudged you forward, “I would hold onto something if I was you.” None sure how to take the comment you clasped the back of the seat, as the robot seemed to lighten up as it started up, lights flickering across the control room. And then you knew it was going to be a long ride.

-

You felt like jelly as you staggered out of the Lion's mouth and onto a white marble platform, probably looking like a sheet. You knees buckled as you tumbled to the ground, legs groaning in pain. Sweat dampened your brow as you tried to calm your breathing. You had only saw stars in you hasty flight and it sickened you greatly.

You had traveled through space, you knew dimly, not wanting to accept the facts. But then again Shiro managed to go into Space and after presumed dead he returned...

You probably could do the same, other than rerun of course, you feared. You had grown weak through the year and you wouldn't be able to fight your way through any storm.

You groaned, as the others joined you, Hunk looking slightly green but unaffected as the rest. You found yourself looking to the ground in shame, painfully pulling yourself to your feet. Lance caught your elbow, helping you in the process, making you very aware how weak you actually were. No wonder they had come back for you, they knew you wouldn't be able to handle the punishment on Earth. But other than that you knew you would probably be a burden to the group, who seemed to have adjusted to the crazy ride into space.

You had two triggers through that, but were fast, but nonetheless had prevented you from actually taking in planets that they had passed and where they actually went. _Where I actually was taken to_. You nodded your thanks to Lance, before following the other three teenagers further across the platform, the lion roared.

You tucked your arms over your head, pressing them to your ears, as fright pounded in your heart, jumping into your throat. It stopped before the images could fully surface, and the doors slid open, you hurried inside, vaguely aware of Lance looking at you worriedly. They probably didn't know how bad your condition was, they could only guess at the things they had heard, and seen. Which, you hoped, wasn't much.

Three figures approached, one you noticed with Shiro, you squinted to adjust you glance, taking in the other two individuals that approached. Both wore clothing of an lush sort, with deep blues and golden trimming. One, a proud regal woman, with dark skin and silvery hair, glaze at you with her icy blue eyes, a uncertain smile tugging on her lips. The other – a male -approached with a eager manner, ginger hair, and facial hair, set with pale skin. Both sported pointed ears and agile build.

You tugged at Keith's jacket, before drawing yourself to your full height, relaxing your face. Whom ever these peer were that had obvious respect, and so you would try and act at least a little more dignified than you actually were. You found yourself fighting back tears through a smile. You had shred too many tears, and all for different reasons.

“You must be the Ms. L/N,” The woman started, trying to appear as friendly as possible, obviously have'n been told of your condition.

You cleared your throat, appearing flustered, “Arrrr, yes. Y/N L/N, usually.”

It was clear now that these two weren't from Earth, if their appearance hadn't already given it away. _Aliens_? It hadn't occurred to you that Aliens could look remotely like this. Something from _The Lord of the Rings_ cross over with _Star Wars_ or _Star Trek_. You found yourself feeling guilty at the thought of comparing them with olden day movies.

Shiro spoke, mistaking you silence as uncertainty, causing you red hue that dusted your cheeks to deepen, “This is Allura, princess of the Alteans and pilot of the Castle of Lions. And this is Coran, they are Altean”, You respected him for informing you, but you just wished that you had been informed earlier – before you were in their presence.

You offered a bright smile, pushing away any growing doubts, “It is nice to meet you, both.” You inclined you head towards the male, before returning to the princess. “Sorry if I'm bothering you-” you started, unsure weather to bow or not – _was that even a thing here?_ You decided to just bob your head.

A smile tugged at Shiro's lips as he stepped forward, becoming the main focus to your eyes, “They wanted to meet you, Y/N, you aren't bothering anyone here.”

Your eyes stung furiously that you had to rub them, unsure how to greet their hospitality. Allura spoke, her voice softening as she approached your frail figure, “We will house you, and help you until you wish to leave, Y/N. A friend to the paladins is a friend to me.”

You meet her eyes, her image blurry with tears, you fought down the sobs that rose to your throat, “Thank you.” You meant it with all your heart. You lowed your head again, feeling the tears fall, and watched them land on your bare feet. You could feel the pity seep into your skin like a second skin. You were tired of your behaviour. You were going to mend, no matter the cost. You would thrive – finally. Away from those who said they could help, the ones that didn't care, the ones that blocked you from the goal they said they'd help you too. Because even to Doctor's a wait is a wait and they'd give up too, long before your recovery started.

One day you would return to Earth, eyes shining and thriving in your new skin, you would prove them wrong.

You looked suddenly to the ceiling that soared high, gracing metres above. You laughed. - Allura had given you a room, which appeared to be more of a chamber than anything, Hunk lead you to it, being the first to volunteer to lead you to them. You followed, strolling next to him, as you walked in companionable silence, moving through the impressive walkways and rooms.

You cleared your throat, deciding the silence was enough, “I respect your guys will to hold any information away from me, after all I am new here and I quite frankly freak out too easily. But I want to know a couple of bits of information, before you bring me to my rooms...” you started, eyeing Hunk up from the corner of your eye.

He looked at your nervously, “Ahuh?” He managed, through his throat, looking uncertain.

You nodded, “Of course, I respect the secrecy, so you don't have to tell me if I over step, but this is a confusing situation I have found myself in, no matter how grateful I am.” You admitted, giving him what you hoped was a lazy smile.

He nodded, “Okay...”

You sighed, gathering your thoughts, “Where exactly are we?”

He shrugged, “Beats me – honesty. Far, far, far, far, far, _far_ away.” He explained, helpfully.

You didn't understood how comfortable with the thought that they were that far away, and no knowing where they were. You shook your head ruefully, your fears couldn't follow you here then. No Joey, No Commander Iverson. You considered the information once again, “Alright, I believe you,” _with a little bit of imagination_ , you didn't add, although tempted too. “What is the propose here? Your propose here?”

He shrugged again, “I'm still finding that out,” he replied honesty, “it involves alien technology, with Lions and their enemy – _saving the world_.” He added dramatically, causing you to let out a snort.

Hunk froze at the sound, unsure by your pleased gesture. You brushed his confusion aside, stepping before him, opening your stride up fully, pushing you hand over the walls as you passed. “And I believe you again,” You called over your shoulder, “you're not the lying type, or your eyes twitches.”

His hands flew to his eyes, “They do?” He cried,

You nodded, stopping, allowing him to yet again walk beside you, “Don't worry, it's not noticeable.” You assured.

He managed a half smile, before stopping, “This is your room. Our rooms are just down the hall,” he pointed to the way you had come, “Shiro is the first door, then Keith, Lance, me, then Pidge.” He supplied helpfully. “The bathroom is across from you,” he pointed to the door that was almost parallel from your room, “I guess one of us will get you for dinner, so we can show you the way.”

You nodded rapidly again, acknowledging the facts with sense of freedom weighing heavy against your mind. 

Hunk rubbed the back on his neck, “Allura told us not to disturb you as you bath and... stuff. She said you are welcome to the soaps and whatever you need.”

You felt yourself smiling, “Thank you, Hunk.” You embraced him soundly, before pulling away, “I'll be fine for now.” Then Hunk departed, allowing you to enter your chamber, that took you breath away.

It was simple, but beautiful like the rest of the place, with white elegant walls, and glowing light. White sheets, and beautifully carved bed frame, that was attached to a single but comfortable looking bed. You grasped your necklace through your hospital gown, as you studied the room.

Allura had placed out clothing for you, simple breeches, a silk shirt and underwear and shocks. Male, but comfortable. You were surprised by the choice of clothing. Having only meet the princess briefly, you sensed she was keen on her appearance. To think that she had gone out of her way to give you clothing much to your liking made you smile softly, pulling the shirt to your chest as you felt it's fabric. Smooth and cool.

Obviously someone had also said something about your normal attire, you thought absentmindedly, helping the princess with Earth's habits. You were grateful for their helping hand. You scooped up the clothing in your arms, and cautiously walked over to the walk in wardrobe at the furthest wall, finding towels rolled neatly on a shelf.

You highly doubted that - even though they had a much more of an important place here - they wouldn't have the same room as you and be restricted to something much more impersonal . Collecting one of the towels, you made your way to the bathroom, double-checking the hallways to make sure no one was coming and slipped into the bathroom to rid yourself of Earth's scent. Grateful - once again - for the hospitality that kept you.


	7. Chapter Seven - Handsome's Face

You bathed for what felt like hours, soaking in the warm waters, scrubbing the days worth of bacteria from your hair and skin, enjoying the scents that rose from the clean waters of the bathtub.

You had picked the most sweeter smell, that didn't remind you too boldly from something from Earth. You were to enjoy being away from it for awhile and then see how you go. You always returned back to the things you cared about, and whether you liked it or not, there were happy memories there, beautiful ones, sad ones, and that'll draw you in sooner that you wanted to admit.

Your family that you hadn't contacted since the funeral. Would they be wondering where you had disappeared to? You literally were wiped off the face of the Earth, and they'd never mind you until you wanted them to, it was a selfish thought, but you didn't push it away as you gingerly stood on your feet, aware of the aching from your legs.

The bath had worked wonders on your aches, but didn't go further than muscle. Drying yourself quickly as you dared, not wanting to slip over, you dressed quickly, feeling the cool material on your skin. The pants were a little long in the legs, and the shirt a little long, but apart from that it fitted well.

Combing your hair roughly with your fingers, you roughly tied it back up, almost frustrated by the result, but to annoyed to actually fix it.

Shrugging, you drained the bath, before you clasped the necklace around your neck again, fighting with the free strands of hair that tangled with the chain before finding the toilet, spending five minutes on it, frowning as you tried to work it. You finally figured it out, before washing up and leaving, feeling renewed and full of brighter spirits.

Returning to your room, you overlooking it again, finding nothing to be suspicious about the room that had been kindly supplied to you. You sat on the large bed, sinking into the soft bedding. You ran your hand over the bed-sheets, drawing patterns in the material, before there was a knocking at the door.

You stood quickly, straightening the bed out, before going to open the door. Shiro was there this time, standing professionally at the door, hands folded behind his back. He flashed your a friendly smile, “Y/N.” He greeted, his voice gentle and welcoming. You had no idea why he had come to collect you, but you were glad. His hands moved, cheeks turning a slight pink, “I figured you'd need footwear, and managed to find footwear that'll look like it'll be able to fit you,” he passed them to you, and you grinned back at him as you took the leather boots from him.

“Thank you, Shiro.” You knew he would know your foot-size roughly, after having to take off your footwear to access you leg completely. You were surprised he remembered. You turned, quickly, hissing at you tender legs and moving to the bed, gingerly lifting your feet up so you could pull the soft leather boots on.

He rushed forward, “Let me help you with that.” He beelined to your side, kneeling bedside the bed.

You sighed heavily, offering the right boot and foot. You didn't bother commenting on his polite gesture, scared that the jib might rub him the wrong way and fluster him and stop him completely from helping you. He chuckled at your done expression, “We after all want to get on dinner on time,” He supplied, breaking the ice, working the boot on your foot.

You laughed with him, allowing his know you were comfortable with those sort of comments and jokes, even if it was weak. You offered the left boot and foot after he was finished, you worked as he gingerly put the footwear on. You blushed, looking quickly away as you found yourself looking at his eyes. “Thank you, I feel so useless.”

Shiro gave a assured shrug, “You have had a lot happen today, I wouldn't be surprised if you feeling it more than usual.” You were feeling it, the bath had worked wonders, but soon pain had to return and it was now.

You yawned, “Yeah, I haven't been this tired in awhile.” you joked, knowing fully well that it had only just been last week. But it did feel like a age ago – after all that had happened...

He nodded his agreement, standing, offering his hand, “I have to agree with you on that one.” You took it hesitantly, allowing him to pull you to your feet, gathering Keith's jacket up into your arms and slinging into over your right shoulder, glad you hadn't forgotten it. He lead you into the hallway, the silence taking over the small talk.

You desperately wanted to talk, but found you didn't have anything but questions. And you were to tired to process the information anyway, so you found no point in asking them. So you walked in silence, something between companionable and awkward. But it was company, that hadn't seen you episodes and that was enough. He might have heard stories from the other's but at least he couldn't pity you for what he had seen.

He had seen you play in the sand, because you hadn't been outside in a while, but that was a different sort of pity - you hoped. Maybe he understood and didn't feel any pity towards you. Maybe he just knew the feeling. You watched him from the corner of your eyes, studying his handsome features, the scar that ran across the bridge of his nose, that gave him a sense of personality that surprised you.

A scar that was accepted as the person, and made with it. One day, you'd never be able to imagine him without. You knew he was once fully dark hair from the pictures, but now you studied the white slash of hair at the front that mop at his forehead. This was a different Shiro from the Earth Shiro. He had changed – maybe for the better. Maybe for the worst. He looked your way, feeling you eyes.

You quickly looked away, heat blooming on you cheeks, burning the tips of you ears. His brow creased, “What?” He asked – _nervously_? You couldn't tell.

You cleared your throat timidly, “Just...” you managed weakly, “trying to figure out everyone.” You almost laughed at yourself.

Shiro looked at you, face relaxing into something that spoke his understanding, but allowed the silence to overtake take you and him as you walked casually down the corridors, you arms extending out unconsciously, pressing against the wall to your left, brushing against the marble-like structure. Two steps ahead, the door slide open for him, as you came in-beside him. You took in the large, long table in the centre of the room, with high backed chairs. All white and clean.

Lance and Keith were already having a disagreement, their eyes glowing as the challenged each other's opinion. Pidge was idly chatting to Hunk, who watched nervously as the two fought, managing to divide his attention. Allura was there, offering a warm smile in your direction. You offered one in return as you cautiously moved over to Keith, drawing his jacket from your shoulder and slinging it around his shoulders, patting his arm absentmindedly.

“You alright boys?” You asked softly, eyeing Lance up, who appeared the more smug of the two. Lance sighed, a careless gesture, “Mullet and I are just having a disagreement.” He replied easily, as Keith huffed, slumping back in his chair.

“Mullet...” he mimicked, looking as though he just ate a lemon, but the argument closed.

Shiro ruffled Keith's hair before guiding you to a seat, hands pressed unconsciously to the middle of your back – you hadn't noticed yourself until it draw away, as he too sat, leaving a feeling buzzing across your skin as you watch Keith squint and sink into his chair. You felt your scowling as well, but for different reasons. You were ashamed of your behaviour, or body's behaviour...

“And how are you feeling?” Allura asked politely, ending her conversation with Coran. You licked your lips, as everyone draw to a silence, attention firmly based around you, “I'm, I'm good.” You managed, feeling like sinking into the chair like Keith had currently been doing, “Thank you,” you added hurriedly, “the clothes and... everything, thank you.”

You paused unsure on how to address the woman, who took the title of Princess. Her smile widened, “I am pleased, they were to your liking then?” She asked, you found yourself wanting to be friends with this woman, no matter her freaking title, you looked down at your clothing, you cheeks burning again, “Yes,” You replied quickly, forcing yourself to slow your reactions down, “they are to my liking.”

You had no idea how you passed as a teacher, maybe it was because you knew your place in the classroom – the head to the younger men and woman – and you didn't know it here, and therefore didn't want to disturb anyone's position that they thought they had gathered up. You weren't exactly looking forward to a hen fight. You decided that it seemed the reasonable answer.

Allura nodded, “Shiro was aware that as a woman of Earth's army, you would be more comfortable in those clothing.” It was true, and you become thoroughly aware that when the time came, Shiro's 'thank you' letter was going to be huge.

You flashed the man a thankful grin, “Thank you Shiro.”

Lance's finger extended fifth finger up, before mouthing, 'I think'. You didn't respond quick enough to ask him what it was about. Instead you looked again to Allura, distantly catching Shiro nodded his acceptance, “And thank you again,” you breathed, “this is the best thing that has happened to me in a long time.” You looked around the table, meeting every individual's eyes, “all of you...”. You hadn't seen so many red faces in one room before.

-

The food was this green goo, that didn't look appealing in the least, but if it kept Allrua's race fit, then you were interested in giving it a try, spooning the goo up and trying to mask you uncertain expression, watching as everyone apart from the native's casually spoon at their food, only taking small bites at a time.

You felt inclined to eat it, hurriedly, ignoring the taste that was presented from eating it. It could've been worst, you reminded yourself, as you down the contents, hoping to fill your stomach and leaving it at that.

It was clear the food was not meant to enjoying purposes. But then again if you were training for whatever they were training for, you clearly didn't want food dragging them down. It was one distraction out of the way.

You slumped back into your seat, blinking rapidly at Lance's astonished face, “You wanna eat mine?” He mouthed, hand pressed to the side of his face, angling away so Shrio won't see the gesture.

You shook you head, “No,” You spoke loudly, “Eat,” You ever felt so much smugness in one feeling.

His face dropped as he groaned, Keith smirking, as he watched his rival mop over his bowl, hovering over the context. Keith shoved his face into the bowl, before leaping away, collecting his own food in his arms and darting off, falling into a seat next to Hunk, falling into a casual behaviour before Lance could recover, his eyes narrowing as he rapidly wiped his face, “Hey!” He snapped, half standing, Keith shrugged again, digging his spoon in the mush, as Shiro turned to watch the two troublemakers.

Lance pouted, “ _Did you see that_?” He cried out, fists clutching in frustration as food dripped off his chin onto his shirt. Shiro shrugged, mimicking Keith's gesture, “No,” He muttered, hoping to end the commotion.

Lance seated himself, scowling towards the shorter boy, the table fall into a silence again, which you were happy to keep, watching as everyone dealt with their meals. Lance still sulked, gathering the remaining meal onto his spoon, and eyeing his rival up.

You sighed, “Lance...” you started, earning a grateful glance from Shiro.

Lance raised an eyebrow, “What?” He asked innocently, throwing his spoon back into his bowl, “I'm full.”

You rolled your eyes, before Shiro spoke up, looking over to you meaningfully, “It's no use, Y/N, they'll be at it again shortly.” Even Shiro had given up.

You nodded, acknowledging his words, before tracing your finger over the bowl edge, mumbling, “If you like each other, you should really treat each other with more respect.” The words were low enough for only only the two individuals that sat nearest you could hear. Shiro chocked, as Lance's eyes widened in protest, standing quickly as he flicked the spoon towards you. You winced as it landed on your face, smack bang in the bridge of your nose.

You cautiously, gathered it up on your finger, as Shiro scowled Lance, you waved his words aside. You sighed, flickering your fingers, aiming it towards the boy. It landed in the nip of his neck. He fall off his chair, landing heavily. You jolted up, leaning over the chair and frowning, at the boy on the ground, “Are you okay?” He squinted at you, wiping the food way, “Yeah. You?” You shrugged, “Never been better.” You replied honesty, offering a hand up. He took it, making sure the food was on his hand before he took your hand.


	8. Chapter Eight - Gentle's Presence

You bathed again before retiring to your room, aware of the light footsteps for the rest of the human team, as they cautiously moved around your room. You appreciated, their thoughtfulness. Allrua had instructed that their would be a nightgown, a robe and other things that she thought may be of use to you in the walking wardrobe. You thanked her again, before departing, wishing everyone else goodnight.

You sighed, changing into the light silky blue blue nightgown, and walked towards the bed, and sitting yourself down, the bed sunk in bliss heaven. Only a year ago would you relent and would be unable to sleep on anything that was more comfortable than carpeted floor broads. Now, you knew you have enabled yourself to relish in the feeling. Mainly because other teachers at the Garrison had caution that even a hard bed could trigger you and therefore had a better quantity bed, which you were grateful for.

Now even more so as you sunk into the bed and drifted off to sleep.

-

You woke with memories flickering wildly across you eyelids, as you sat up, breathing rough against your throat and your body spent as though you had run for miles and miles. Hair tangled wildly around your neck, and your nightgown tangled around your waist. You groaned, slumping back into the pillow, breathing deeply as you tried to collect yourself. You knew that you wouldn't be able to go to sleep now, your mind was too awake from the haunting memories and body to responsive. Sighing again, this time in frustration, you gingerly sat up and swung your legs over the bedside, feeling the cool floor seep into your overheating body.

Licking your lips, you gathered up your clothing up in your arms and dressed quickly and cautiously, doing your best without a light to guild you, before drawing attention to your nest-like hair, groaning and you fought with the tangles.

Once done, you slide out of your room, moving lighting against the dim light, stepping further into the hallway, the lights flickered. You froze, knowing what was happening before you could stop it. Gritting your teeth, in frustration, you pushed onward doing your best to sprint to the other end of the hallway way, hoping that the lights would dim shortly. Hoping that the lights would go unresponsive after you left, dimming immediately after your departure. You hissed, as you leg gave out, the muscles around the break seized up, and you collapsed on your knees. If the light hadn't woken up, your falling did and with a little of amount a dignity, you stumbled to the side wall, before the closet members started to arise. You cursed, as Shiro's door slid open. You brought your knees to your chest, ignoring the fact that your legs cramped up and ached at the sudden movement and brought your head into your arms, hiding the embarrassment that was clearly written all over your face. “Y/N?” Shiro's voice asked softly, probably eyeing you up with no small amount of curiosity.

You groaned, “Tried to out run the lights.” You explained briefly, “Didn't want to wake you guys.”

He sighed, as the other doors slid open, Keith's being the first. “Wha-?” He grumbled tiredly, you didn't look up from your arms.

“Sorry,” you moaned, finally releasing your legs after another painful cramp seized up your leg.

Then Lance's door opened, “Hey Keith-!” He started, loudly, ready to take on the world – and Keith, “Did you that on propose?!” Then he noticed your figure on the floor.

Keith went to reply, as the other two doors opened. Shiro stepped out into the hallway, “No one is it on purpose guys, go back to bed.” There was a collective groans, but each obeyed mumbling a, 'it's okay, Ms. L/N' or 'night'.

You waited for the fifth door to close, but it never came as Shiro approached you, kneeling down beside you. “Come on,” he encouraged, putting his hands under your arms, as he helped your effortlessly onto your feet, your head still bowed unable to meet his eyes. “Let's go elsewhere,” He smoothed, as you settled onto your feet, leading you out of the hallway, the lights almost going out almost instantly. Guiding you quietly to another room, the lights flickering, he lead you to the nearest seat, before drawing up his own seat next to yours. You finally gathered up the courage to look up, “You can go back to bed-” You started, before looking at him completely, realizing that he seemed wide awake, eyes bright and full concern. Something of a leader, no wonder the young men looked to him. He was strong and had a sense of power. You always followed people that did, it was in human nature, probably in everything's nature actually.

He offered you a reassured smile, “I wasn't asleep anyway,” he assured, “I think it's better to be awake and not alone, because it's when you are that's when the nightmares start to creep in.”

You eyed him up, unsure on what to make about his statement, was it suspicious? Or what? He looked at you expectantly, and you slumped fulling into your seat, groaning, “Oh.” You managed, cheeks tingling.  _How did you know?_

He leaned forward, “Y/N...” he whispered softly, his touching briefly brushing against your chin, encouraging you to look at him, your eyes flickered over his handsome face, “I don't know what you've seen, and you don't know what I've seen. But we both know that there will be challenges and no matter there shape or form, we'll have to face them. So I'm going to ask you to be open with me, if no one else....” you bowed your head again, and he reached forward, more quickly, “hey, hey, hey,” he cooed, worriedly, “Y/N...” he tried again, sighing heavily, “look at me.”

Your brow creased with worry as you looked up to read his features.

“I know what's it's like,' he hesitated briefly, “I understand what it's like to be afraid, it's better to face that, I have found, in company. I'm here for you – all of us are.” He placed a heavy hand on your knee, and you felt yourself give out a shy smile.

“Thank you,” You managed, tears stinging you eyes at the kind words. You hadn't opened – obviously – up with your condition, it was obvious that you had suffered with it, but ever had you spoken about it to someone. You refused to utter a word, how could that act like they cared when they didn't?

That was like humans too, they tried to hard to care, when affection didn't come naturally towards the other individual. The either cared, or they didn't and you didn't like allowing people to pretend. Accepting that about themselves. You didn't. “That means a lot,” You breathed out, reflecting on the past people that had offered their concerns to you – Joey being one of them.

Why did you trust Shiro so easily?

You looked at him sharply, and realized you saw no falsehood reflecting in his face. It was general concern and maybe even deep down, a desire to have an individual understands too. You froze, looking at him, a frown creasing your forehead, as you stared at him. He stared back.

“You have PTSD,” you managed, wide eyed, unbelieving towards the fact.

He paused, looking quickly away, before looking back, “You could say I have that,” he replied honesty, his voice low.

You couldn't believe it, you hadn't even thought that he too could suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. The more you thought about it you realized it made sense more than none. He had spent a year in space after all. Who knew what he had gone through.

You're pain suddenly felt small compared to the Leader of the paladins.

Grimace you straightened in your chair, “I- I'm sorry,” you stuttered, cheeks blooming with a rosy pink, “I didn't know,”

Shiro flashed you assured smile again, “No, it's fine. I just prefer to keep it quite though, it's not their burden to carry, they have enough on their plate as it is.” You understood.

You licked your lips nervously, “Is that why you were still up?” You whispered, checking the entry ways, to make sure no one lingered.

He shook his head, “No. I'm still getting use to the time-frame, I've mostly recovered from it.” You didn't know to believe him or not, he was a trustworthy person after all – how could you not trust him? But then again...

You nodded numbly, “I know,” you let out a nervous laugh, “I think that's part of the reason. I would call it 'jet leg', but but we didn't...” you trailed off, giving up entirely in trying to explain.

“Lance called it: Lionleg,” Shiro explained, straight-faced, that you found yourself laughing.

“Oh, Lance,” you grasped between your laughter before you manged to control your laughter, you grinned, “it's a very Lance thing to say...” a comfortable silence followed, as you leaned forward, hands locked on your knees as your mind drifted, at the memories of the Garrison, at the mostly good memories. “He was always a happy student,” you explained distantly, “one of the most pleasant students I got to know in my year there. Hunk and Pidge were among the others... Keith I remember distantly, but I don't have a direct memory of him. All good kids – a lot of them with that school were, intelligent and considerate. Not once had they misspoken to me to embarrass me,” -  _because that is an very easy thing to do_ , you didn't add - “though I had heard things that they could be troublesome.” You rocked back in your seat, remembering your time there. Shiro watched you intently, seemingly too scared to interrupt. Scare that he would break you trace that seemed to please you.

You shook your head ruefully, “But I always felt trapped there, I tried to convince myself that I was happy, but deep down I wasn't. I was born for adventure, and I was brought down so low,” - a coward - “I tried to help myself, but all I was doing was damaging myself further.” You voiced your concern aloud, sighing, your shoulders slumping.

And then did Shiro gently interjected your thoughts, “You tried and that's there is all to it, Y/N,” his hands reached forward again, squeezing your upper arm, “you try and you learn. And now you know what you did wrong and will avoid it and move on.”  _because that's all you can do._

You gave him a sad smile, leaning into his grasp, before changing the subject, “I'm really sorry I still disturbed you, I should've have run. But I was scared the guys would wake up,” you rumbled on.

Shiro shook his head, “They'll deal with it,” he assured, before standing, “do you feel up for walking?” He asked, offering his hand.

You tested your legs, “Yeah,” You replied, hesitantly taking him up on the offer.

“Good,” He smiled, “I'll show you around.”

-

When he said: 'show you around', he meant it, weaving in-between corridors and sometimes stopping to have a break. Sometimes you would sit on the floor, each to each other. Other times you would find chairs to seat yourselves on. Somewhere in-between, tiredness finally took over and as you straggled to keep your eyelids open, too interested to shut eye. You yawned, fighting against the urge to yawn again straight after, Shiro laughed softly, “Don't fall asleep on me, Y/N, I'd only have to wake you again.”

You blinked furiously at the familiar sentence, and waved him off, “I know, I know.”

He shook his head and back tracked, explaining the last past weeks here and the team bounding, that came to be your favourite part about the talk.

He lead you back to your chamber, opening up the door for you and the lights flickered on, you turned, managing a tired smile, “You've got to promise you'll show me the rest when you have time to show me?” You asked between your teeth as you fought against yawning again.

He lazy grin tugged at his lips, “I promise.”

You grinned back, thanking him, before telling him to go to bed, seeing the long talk and walk how the desired effect on him also. Dawn was almost upon you, but you had a couple of hours to sleep before breakfast was served in the dining hall. You sunk back into your bed, the sheets cool on your skin, and drifted off to sleep, legs relaxing as you slept into morning.   


	9. Chapter Nine - Vision's Game

You awoke, having no definition in what that time was. Realizing you hadn't changed back into your nightgown, you sighed heavily, hands creasing over the folding of you clothing, setting it back into position, untying your hair, allowing it to fall onto your shoulders. You carded your fingers through it, thoughtfully, you hadn't cut your hair in a year, and had grown wild and terribly uneven, you added, drawing a strand of hair between your fingers and peering closely at the evidence.

Grimace, you cast you split hair and stood, retying it – at least then, it wasn't noticeable. Until, you thought again, with disdain, someone came close enough.

Shaking the girlish thoughts that floated in the front of your mind, you stepped away from the bed, setting the duvets straight, and crisp. Pleased with its tidiness, you moved towards the door, going to reach for the door handle that didn't exist. The handle fall through your fingers. You blinked furiously as the door slid open instead. Shaking the odd feelings that crawled in your mind, turning the information in your mind.

Stepping out into the hallway, all was quite.  You were grateful, and meekly you made your way to the dining hall, hoping that you remembered the corridors correctly.

Thankfully you did.

Sighing again, you slipped into the empty hall, a bowl was placed in the middle, and note leaning against it. You approached the table, and taking the note in your hand.

_Don't tell Coran I made this._

_-Hunk._

A smile curled on the tips of your lips, as you draw the bowl closer towards you. It looked more appealing than the goo that you had consumed last night, and you gratefully sat yourself down, and picked up the utensils that had been left for you. It was still warm, and pleasant, signifying that had only just left the hall. But you weren't going to chase them, you'll eat and then have another look around – after all you were pretty sure that you remembered with the training room was, from last night.

Casually you studied the note in your boredom, flipping it over. Your smile broadened at the sight of a roughly drawn by presuming Pidge, whose rough sketch quickly across the back of the note. It small bold letters, she – he – you adjusted, feeling bad, had made instructions in where they were. You bite your lip, before eating. The food was awesome considering what Hunk probably had to work with.  _Very limited_ , you mind went through the briefly list of what could've been stored.

And even that was a far stretch in-between. Foods would've been different in different areas of the cosmic galaxy. It all relied on the gravitational pull, the light intensity, the water's flow and cycle. Of the  _atmosphere_. Mumbling about science, you stood, bowl clasped in your fingers as you considered whether to leave it or not.

It'll be rude to leave it, you knew, to expect someone else to pick up after you. But then where would you put it. Flushing in embarrassment, you decided to look for the kitchen.

Thankfully you found the kitchen just off the hall, and running the bowl under the tap, you looked wildly for something to wash it. Finding a clean towel, you set it aside as you cleaned the bowl furiously, the bubbles from the soaps, rising to your nose, causing you to sneeze.

Drying it off, you drained the sink and setting the bowl on the bench, before setting off, looking to relieve yourself before following the quickly drawn map to your destination.

Following was easy, considering that you had walked the halls that night. Stepping briefly into front of the sliding door, the doors slide up. You smiled at your eyes landed on the team, sitting on couches that were set around in a semi-circle, just off the set of stairs you stood. Lance and Hunk having a thumb war, looked up, their faces lightening up. “Ms. L/N!” They coursed, causing everyone to look up.

You nodded, flinching at the name, though you couldn't blame the students – ex students. You considered correcting them, but why would you? You were  _Ms. L/N_ , you hadn't proved you were Y/N, that Shiro had called you.

You were the timid teacher that suffered from her past. You weren't the woman that stood high, against the sea of the other's like yourself in uniform and fingers saluting your commanders.

You managed a brief smile, walking down the steps with ginger movements, your legs still uncertain. They hurt from all that walking last night, but it was your stiff muscles that caught your attention mostly.

Joining the five on the crouches, you finally spoke, “Morning everyone. Thanks for the stretch Pidge,” You thanked, “And Hunk.”

The peer glowed with smugness as they slumped into the crouch’s they sat on. You allowed yourself to relax, “And I'm sorry for last night.” You apologised, your voice lowing at your guilt.

Lance waved a hand dismissively, “That's fine, Ms. L/N.”

Keith shot him a frown, before looking at you kindly, “Don't worry, I'm pretty sure Lance tried to outrun the lights too. In daytime.”

“Did not!” The other boy protested loudly, half standing.

Keith shrugged, “I'm pretty sure it was you cursing in the hallway on the first night.” He prodded back, posture relaxed, but eyes blazing.

Lance's face relaxed, before: “Or you were just dreaming about me. Oh how swe-” He cooed, looking as satisfied as a cat. Or smug.

Keith's face twisted in frustration, “In  _your_ dreams, tailor.” He sneered, shoulders going rigid. How they could possibly be in a team, was beyond you. Shiro, who sat on the edge opposite you, sighed.

“Guys enoug-” He started, only to be cut off by the peers bickering. You blinked, their words of anger and frustration lost on you. Shiro's brow creased with his own frustration, “ _Guys enough_.” He repeated, voice low, penetrating through their rising tones.

They paused, falling back into their seat with a huff. A silence chocked the room, muffling out any thoughts of words and leaving the group to be lost within their own minds, before Shiro broke it, “Now, how was everyone's sleep.” He tried, the silence threatening to take over.

Pidge was the second to answer, his higher voice colliding with Hunk's. They squinted at each other, before trying again. You found yourself laughing as they answered. How such a simple thing make you pleased, confused even yourself, as you calmed, flushing red with embarrassment. Everyone's eyes were alight as they casually stared at you.

Shiro looking the most pleased, his signature smirk tugged on his lips as he watched you, before being the first to turn away from you glance, “Come on, Paladins,”  _it couldn't be the first time you had seen her laugh like that._

You slumped, clearing your throat, “Did I sound funny?” You had laughed, if you remembered correctly, yesterday.

They looked away quickly, Lance answering hurriedly to answer, “No- no! Prefect.” He croaked out, trying to pull a smirk to his lips, in recovery.

You didn't know how to feel about it. Instead, you glared, drawing your knees to your chest as you watched Shiro stand, stretching effortlessly, before speaking, “Alright, back to our Lions guys.” He announced, “We aren't stopping yet.”

You didn't bother to ask what they were doing. You hadn't deserved that either. You would earn your keep before you started to throw your weight around. You smiled, “Alight-” you started, standing to announce that you were going to find something to do. Help Allura? Or Coren – they would probably be helping each other out.

Shiro cut you off, with a soft clearing of his throat, “Can you help us?”

You froze, caught between indecision. “Sure!” You replied, hurriedly, knowing you had left the silence drag on further than normal. “What do you want help with?”

Shiro's mirrored your own, pleased and uncertain, “Thank you, Y/N. We need someone on the ground, giving us ideas. Allura agrees with the idea, your insight could different from everyone else's here.”

You nodded, unsure why you had agreed so quickly. Months ago you couldn't step outside. Three weeks ago, had been the first time you had stepped outside in daylight. Yesterday you had just meet the Lions that you four (ex) student’s piloted, and even then you were a mess.

Combining the three wasn't a good idea just yet – but you couldn't let them down. Maybe that was why, or it was you finally feeling the thrill of being able to  _do something._ Even if it was standing offering ideas to the five individuals that probably didn't need your help in the first place.

But you had to apparent the effort Shiro had gone through to invite you to join, and occupied your time with them. Even if it was very small attempt, it was a gracious move all the same.

 _But then anything could be gracious coming from him,_ you mind chirped loudly in the hollows of your mind, causing you to fight down a wince that crawled up your spine. How had you become so aware of said's behaviour? Every effort of his seemed to rub you the opposite way than the students attempts had. Why?

Because he's a  _grown_  male. This time you did wince as you followed the paladin's out, a red rose blooming on your cheeks, burning the tips of your ears as you tried to keep pace with them.


	10. Chapter Ten - Denial's Taste

Apparently the training exercises were damaging of time, or so Lance had claimed, grumbling as he sunk into the hallway that lead to his Blue Lion. And you believed him, after Allrua had guided you outside, handing you a helmet. “We had to make one for you,” she explained, “we're working on your suit.”

_Suit?_

You took it, licking you lips as you felt its heavy weight. Your muscles tensed, coiling up and tightening. Your lungs crashed themselves as you fought control. “I- I...than...k-” you tried, trying to breath deep on your tight lungs, “can't... breath...” you bent over, trying to grasp for air, eyes watering as you fought the urge to throw it to the ground.

Allrua gripped it, pulling it away. But the damage was done. You groaned as waves of images embraced your mind, the whistling of the bombs – the feeling of the helmets secured onto you head.

You remembered witnessing as one of you comrades had chocked on the cable, as the material damaged his skull from the acidic foams.

You were distantly aware of Allrua pulling you back inside, as the images flashed against your eyes, dying as the light vanished of the sun. You were immediately ashamed, pulling gently away from the princess and walking briskly away. Down a corridor, dimly aware of Allrua calling after you, worriedly. You walked, until your legs – too weak to even give signal – collapsed. You sobbed, falling hard, drawing yourself up into a ball, hands clutching hard at your knees. Footsteps echoed across the hall, “Ms. L/N?” Lance.

You groaned, burying you head into your arms, unsure how to appear to the student. Your eyes still weeping and heart aching with realization. You weren't good enough, to even hold a  _helmet_. “Yes Lance?” You asked, trying to pulling the strength into your voice. It only seemed to imply how miserable you felt. “Don't worry about me Lance. I'm fine – I just need a moment.” You assured through your arms, as the young man seated himself opposite you.

“Me too,” He agreed, “life's tough, no matter what you're living.” He sighed out, stretching out, his legs coming opposite you.

He made sense, you realized, everyone made life tough. No matter how hard their life actually was.

He shrugged and you quietness, “God, I'm  _tired._ All this saving the world stuff is getting really tiring – at first I thought it'll be cool, you know? Like those old movies, like... Captain America, or Iron Man.” He ranted onward.

You didn't have the heart to tell him that each had difficulties along the way – if you remembered it correctly. Your parents had kept movies from their teenager times, or young times anyway, and Marvel movies along with other 'superhero' movies were among them, often when you were younger and still living daily at your parents’ home, you would sit yourself down and go through them, often selecting ones you hadn't watched and pull out the old DVD player out and watch them.

You think you managed to get through most of them, before moving out. You even considered stealing the last couple with the DVD player, to finish your odd goal.

You finally looked up, eyes still stinging with the effort in trying to stop the tears, that already slid down you face. “Yeah, but soon you'll appreciate this job for what it is – even if it isn't the idea you thought it to be in the first place. You'll grow and so will the outcome of each mission. Then you'll start to understand the true definition of; heroism. Everything thinks themselves as a hero, Lance. You just got to make sure you become the hero that reflects off everyone positively.”

“Positively...” he tried, face suddenly brightening, “apart from if they are your enemy.” He thought aloud, looking as though he was working through the facts in his fast mind.

You smiled, “No one is the enemy, it's the idea they have that is.”

He blinked furiously, unable to see what you meant truly. You shrugged, “But you won't think that until later.”

“What if they start shooting you?” He suddenly asked, a smug little smile tugged at his lips.

“There is always a reason they do it, Lance. That's the idea. If you shoot at someone, doesn't mean they are your enemy. It's what drives them at is. They think they are doing well by themselves and those they involve themselves around. You think you are the good one. But when it really comes down to it, it's just your opinions that differ. If you are that hero that reflects positively on  _everyone –_ not thing – you could help them realize that their idea is the wrong one. They leave that idea. Would you label one who as accepted their wrongness as an enemy still? I know I wouldn't. Idea – enemy, that's what you fight against and it could change...” it was going in one ear and out the other, you thought, watching his bewildered expression flash across his face, before settling down into a confused frown.

You sighed, “Not one whole person is your enemy, you'd agree with them on something...” you draw out. Waving aside your thoughts, realizing that you had lost yourself too. You sighed in frustration, wiping your eyes. “Sorry, I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore.”

If you were being honest with yourself, you had lost insight into what you were trying to say a couple of sentences in.

Lance nodded, but couldn't help the lost expression on his face, “Right....” he managed slowly, “so you are an enemy to yourselves idea?”

You frowned, completely caught off guard. “What?”

His fingers stroked his chin as he watched you, eyes narrowing as he was considering you, but a new voice spoke. Keith. “You disagree with yourself, and your position among us.” Keith supplied for the other male, stepping out of the shadows. So drawn into your conversation with Lance you hadn’t noticed his arrival.

You coughed, unsure on how to reply. You blinked furiously, as Keith leant against the wall, arms crossed. “I...I” you tired, eyebrows drawing together, “yeah.”  _but maybe for different reasons._

Lance's grinned, but Keith kept his serious glance on you, as the hyper boy spoke, “That and her crush for metal man.”

Your frown deepened at the turn events, “Iron man?” You asked, he had been in your conversation, but you had no idea how the hell he managed to come up with  _that._

Keith rolled his eyes, as though he knew what the other boy was talking about, “You are so  _stupid._ ” He moaned out, looking as though, he too wanted to throw himself at the wall, “They. Just. Met.”

You chocked loudly, “What?” You cried, the idea finally dawning on you, “oh you’re a hopeless romantic Lance,” You huffed, “on the other hand I'm not. So don't get your hopes up about the idea your brewing there Lance,. I'm not interested.” You stood, straightening, knowing that you were interested. But then again you were hopeless in that sort of things. And a quite serious when it came to finding a partner – resulting in a fruitless search years ago, and only decreased fully. You had accepted at one point, that you had no man going for you. Heart sore you closed the door and pushed the hope-crushing idea away.

Lance hurried to join you, as Keith joined you on the other side. “Not interested in what?” Lance asked, loudly. You were dimly aware of Keith wincing.

You sighed, “Just because there is two adults, among a group of teenagers doesn't mean you get them together, Lance. It's not a movie or novel. This is reality.”

“There's four adults.” He pointed out, as Keith tried to shoos him. “And I know it’s not-”

“Look Lance, lay it off. She's made her intentions clear.” Keith finally broke it, glaring at him, head tilting towards the taller man.

Lance huffed, but fall quite, giving up. You were glad for the silence, rubbing sheepishly at your eyes, before blinking furiously, eyes burning.

 _That's what happened when you rub your eyes a little too hard, Y/N,_ you thought almost bitterly, unsure what had turned you so sour so quick. Usually after an episode, you were meek and passive, even to yourself a lot of the time.

You anger didn't spark up often, you knew, and only for good reason did is spring up to its potential. You hadn't gotten anger in a long time.

The other Paladins awaited in the room that you had left Allura at, you paused at the end of the corridor. Shiro was the first to smile:  _I'm here for you – all of us are_. His words ringing in your ears, you stepped out of the gloomy hallway, after the two rivals and walked briskly towards them. “Sorr-” you started, ready to apologise for any mishaps that your continuous behaviour could've caused them.

Allrua was the first to cut you off, “Y/N, I should be the one apologising. I didn't know that you had... they told me,” she explained gesturing towards the gathered young people, “I so sorry, I should've been more aware of your triggers...”

You offered a smile, “And I should've informed you, princess” You replied, smoothly. You should've and you knew that.

Allrua frowned, but gave a cult nodded, accepting your words. Deep down, you accepted hers too – just to make yourself feel better. She sighed, “Alright, Paladins back to training with your Lions. You may have successfully created Voltron, but twice is never enough. Y/N stay with me.” The group obeyed as though they were sheep. Coren remained beside her, eyes watching you as you shifted from foot to foot. “And Coren, can you be in the Control Room. I fear they may need eyes outside of their constant bickering.”

And so you were left alone with the Princess of an alien race. Her eyes trained fully onto you, you hadn't realized how much power could linger in was glaze. And knew this was he undivided attention that was drawn to you. “Y/N...” she started, gesturing for you to join her as she began to stroll away from either direction of outside, or the Control Room. She strolled further into the castle, head high and proud. Something you use to understand.

You fall in beside her, unable to respond to her.

She sighed again, “Let's speak heart to heart here,” she offered, not bothering to look at you, as you followed her graceful footsteps. You forced yourself to nod briskly.

Then finally she looked down at you. You fought the urge to step back at her intense glaze. You cleared your throat, “Alright then, about what?” You asked, hoping that was what she was looking for.

She suddenly smiled, “Of our lives of course, I want to know the weakness and strengths of those I surround myself with. Or else you can't look to build up their character and flex the team together so they work seamlessly together – as though they are one. You are a part of us, Y/N...”

This conversation was ringing a bell – hadn't Shiro said something similar? You frowned, “Yes I know-”

“I know you have struck common ground with Shiro,” she cut you off, rather hurriedly, “which would be a good part of your development into the team. You know I'd thought you guys were complete opposites, the way Lance and Hunk had mentioned you earlier, you sounded as though you were something too fragile to bring into this reality. But the children seemed to love you, and I couldn't allow someone that they cared live in the circumstances they had described to me. Are humans truly that cruel?” She asked, finishing her introduction into the conversation.

You shrugged, caught off guard by the question, “They don't like different. I have read stories of history where one skin colour was considered superior to the other – I think we have improved from that at least. Somewhere in the early 2000's, our attitude towards each slowly changed. Now that we are through half of that century I'd like to think times have change drastically.”

She frowned, peering at her own dark skin, “Strange,  _skin colour._ Who'd think that'll cause distress?”

You nodded, “We humans don't like different, different opinions, different sexuality, differen-”

“Sexuality?” She mimicked, her frown deepening.

You blinked again, trying to back track how the hell you managed to get stuck in this conversation. You found that it was your fault. You felt your cheeks reddening, but explained, “You know... male and female. Male and male. Female and female. No gender, or all gender, change gender-”

Allrua only looked more baffled, “You put them into categories?” She sounded as though I had been the reason this whole mess started in the first place.

You licked your lips, “Ummmm...” you trailed off, yet again unsure on how to approach the topic at hand.

She waved her hand dismissively, “Okay, back to the point at hand here, and it's about you, not your bazaar human race on Earth. Alright...” she seemed to gather herself, as she looked at you hard. You found yourself sinking into the furthest shadow. She scowled.


	11. Chapter Eleven - Faith's Importance

You had spent the rest of the day with Allrua, after your conversation she guided you to the Control Room, explaining what had happened with the team previously, explaining about their full purpose here, although you were aware of her leaving information out, and you had to respect that – after all, she didn't have to tell you.

You joined the Paladin's for lunch, who ate meekly, before Hunk had refused to eat anymore and went to cook something better. Little was spoken between you and the other team members, who seemed content to eat in silence.

You joined them for dinner, after having a shower, breezing past the two arguing members of the team and seating yourself next to Hunk, who appeared sick of the goo – and escaping it. The meal was reasonably quite as well, as though training had drained them completely. You couldn't blame them. After lunch Allrua had instructed them into the Training Panel. She had welcomed you to watch, but refused and followed her to the Control Room, unwilling to meet face to face with a weapon that could possibly trigger your inner panic.

After the dinner, you managed to slip, bidding everyone a goodnight and bathing again, vaguely under the impression that the men showered and you had the luxury of a  _bathtub._ Shaking the thought aside, you dried yourself, before going to bed, legs beginning to feel the days work completely.

Sighing as you gingerly slipped into your bed, you breathed deep, dropping off to sleep before the thought of comfort crossed your mind completely.

-

You awoke again, body still incapable of moving – you knew you had awoken from your nightmares, no matter your clear mind that took over after. You didn't have nightmares often and you blamed the recent adventures. You didn't believe fully in destiny, after all who'd have a destiny like yours? To suffer from the past? To weep at every kind gesture that was thrown your way?

Simply you stopped believing. One upon a time, you knew, you had believed in destiny but as you turn into your twenties, you started to wonder what made destiny. What was the actual result to each... Happiness? Contentment?

Destiny couldn't be true if your were dreading the touch of it.

You groaned, as you muscles began to respond to your active mind, and then you were fully awake, pulling yourself into a sitting position, before looking quickly for another peer of clothing, making a mental note to do your washing – and maybe everyone else.

Maybe that's the way I can make myself useful, you thought mildly, finding a spare shirt and loose pants in the draws set with the wardrobe, that you hadn't bothered to check. These where a little bigger than the previous ones, which explained why Allrua had set the other's out first. The shirt was silky and pearl white with a crease you couldn't make out. The pants were a soft brown, with probably was designed to cut just above the ankle – it went over your heal. You grunted, pulling them roughly onto your legs, rolling them up tightly. The shirt couldn't be helped, as it reached to mid thigh. Not that you cared.

Untiring your dried hair, you combed back the wild hair into a ponytail, ignoring the sting pain in pulling it too tight at the back.

Shrugging, you put on the boots, your legs still half asleep and allowing a reasonably comfortable obedience. You straightened, flecking your muscles, into full awareness. Painful pin n' needles settled in to bottom of your feet. Grimace you limped to the door, knowing fully aware of your heavy footsteps. The door slide with a gentle hiss, and lightly stamping onto your feet to get rid of the horrible feeling, you walked to hallway finally, not trying this time to outrun the lights.

Slipping out of the corridor, you began to lead yourself around the castle, throwing ideas on what to do before everyone else woke. You knew that it was much further into the night, unlike last night and probably wouldn't get back to sleep before dawn approached fully. Pausing at the Control Room, you watched as the doors slid up, offering the view of the Control Room, that you had spent most of yesterday in. To the side, your helmet was placed hurriedly on the nearest ledge, that could hold it. You hadn't seen it yesterday, but then again, Allrua must of hid it.

Gathering up your courage, you stepped into the massive room aware of the feeling on intruding. Pushing the emotion aside, you walked cautiously towards the helmet. Five others seemed to be lined up on the table, each battle worn, but showing any signs of real damage. Swallowing away the dry throat, you closed your eyes, reaching out to the helmets. The table's cool surface cooled your sweaty palms. Frowning you hand search for at least one of the helmets.

Nothing.

“What are you doing?”

You yelped, stepping back, looking in the direction of Shiro, who stood in the entrance. Your mouth worked, before looking sharply back at the helmets. The was nothing...

Shaking your head furiously, you double checked.  _What?_

_Sleepwalking..._

You couldn't ignore the hammering of your heart, and the sweating of your palms, as you edged away, feeling panic lay like hot iron in your stomach.

Painful. Confusing... what?

“Hey, hey, hey,” Shiro soothed, as he drew away from you, watching your face pale and eyes widen. He reached for you, drawing to his chest as you stared in the direction of the helmets, feeling as though you weighed nothing. As though you didn't exist. Nothing.

Nothing... nothing...  _nothing..._

“Y/N?” He whispered, breath hot against your ear, arms wrapped around you as you fought yourself to answer him, “Yes?” You managed,

“What's the matter?” He asked softly, feeling yourself control yourself, body becoming responsive again, seemingly getting heavier against his body.

Your mouth worked for an answer, “Sleepwalking.” You answered, voice distant, knowing it seemed more than that. Shiro obviously would know better. You shook your head, voice stronger, “Ummmm, sleepwalking.” You repeated, as you returned.

You slumped heavily against him, as he helped you out of the Control Room, uncertain on what to make of it. It wasn't obviously your 'normal', he thought with a frown as he lead you through the hallway, you legs seemingly moving on their own accord as you mind ran.

You blinked, “Thank you, Shiro.” You thanked, breaking the silence and your trace.

Looking down at you, he grinned, feeling glad for your presence, “That's alright, Y/N.”

You smiled, it never reached your eyes, mind still working. “Sorry, I was sleepwalking – I think. I awoke, I remember and thought I'd take a walk, my mind must be really tired to do that.” You explained his earlier question.

Pouting the Leader of the Paladin's looked at you hard, “Are you sure you were sleepwalking?” He asked, voice curiously, but eyes worried.

Suddenly annoyed, you crossed your arms, “I did say: I think, didn't I?”

He laughed, brightening up the hallway. You felt yourself respond eagerly to his laughter, as you managed another smile. “True,” he replied, smoothly. There was a silence, that dragged in claws into their necks. The feeling of not knowing each other entirely began to feed the darkness.

After all, you thought, you  _actually_  didn't know him. And yourself. You fought the urge to panic again, your stomach dropping. This had to be a sign you were recovering right? Or getting worse?

You hoped it wasn't the last. “Why are you awake?” You asked, trying to push the uncertainty aside.

He shrugged, “I actually just woke up, just after you, saw the lights go off and decided to check out if something was wrong.”

You offered him a grateful smile, “Thank you, I haven't sleepwalked since I was very young.”

“I don't think I ever sleepwalked,” He encouraged the conversation, “either that or my parents never told me. I like my bed too much.”

You had no idea why, but you found that hard to believe. He just seemed to energetic to like to settle down and  _sleep_. Getting up at early morning proved it.

You smiled, “The bed hasn't accepted me as one of their own yet, but soon I'll have it. And you might never see me sleepwalking again.” You commented, lighthearted.

“Now you're starting to sound like Lance,” He jibed.

You chuckled, “Although he'd probably come up with something more reasonable.”

Shiro looked doubtful, mirroring an expression that Keith often used. They probably knew each before hand, you thought, in comfortable statues, allowing similar behavioral expressions, such as facial to mirror each other strikingly.

Although Shiro had a more comfortable way about his emotions on his face. Open and trusting to his team members. Keith was a stone wall.

You nudged him, “Don't look so doubtful,” you teased, kindly.

His smile was contagious, you noticed, as he shrugged hopelessly, walking slightly ahead of you, “I always have faith in my team members – I have too. Or else this won't work.” 

You hurried your step to keep up with him, “What won't work?”

“Taking down the Galra. Forming Voltron. Being a team.” He answered, with a dismissive wave, “you can't do any without faith.”

 _Faith..._  that's what you were missing.


	12. Chapter Twelve - Memories' Fangs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This book is currently at Season One, Episode 3 - the start. I know the time difference is different, is not by a week, instead by like three. But I don't think it'll have a huge impact on the story-line as a whole. I'm sorry if it annoys you, I really am, but I haven't found anything that fits, so I'm going to make it fit.

You nightly talks with Shiro fall into a routine, throughout the week. And for his company, you were glad, even though sometimes the nights seemed like nothing was said between you. Other times, it felt as you spoke levels of existence. Throughout the day, the only time you saw him was at lunch and dinners, which was fine, usually. Sometimes you just wanted to talk out your mind, but when the time came, you kept closed up, and only offered half of the problem. Then it'll repeat, until you couldn't care less. Even if he thought he got the full information.

You managed to get Hunk to teach you what everyone preferred tastes were, and cooked sometimes for the stake of cooking. Sometimes you would collect the dirty washing and do it, just to do something. Other times you helped Allrua out in the Control Room or around the castle.

This time you decided to do something different, “Allrua?” You asked suddenly, as she ran through repair work.

She hummed, but didn't answer.

“Coran?” You asked again, though to her fatherly sort of figure,

The man answered almost instantly, “Yes, Y/N?” You liked Coren, strangely, not usually liking over dramatic people like him, but he just worn on you.

You sighed, gathering up your courage, “Can I please have a look at the helmet?”

Coren blinked, as though you had asked him to shave off his facial hair, “The helmet?” He repeated, unsure how this come into the conversation.

You nodded, “I want to see if I have the same... reaction...” You managed through gritted teeth, as Allrua straightened, turning to face you, brow creased.

“Are you sure, Y/N?” She asked,

You nodded again, “Please, sometimes I can adjust myself to objects. And if I work on it, I can overcome it. Take going outside as an example. I think facing those things that trigger and adjusting my thoughts, I could maybe break free of these fear I have." You explained, hopefully. 

Allrua considered your thoughts seriously, "Could yep, yes. Not completely rid of them, no. I believe that'll take a bit more time," she looked up, eyes bright and thoughtful. "alright, Y/N, but someone has to be with you in case something happens. You have to be open to what happens to you - we don't know if it could have the desired effect."

You nodded, a smile drawing onto your lips, "Thank you. I understand." 

She suddenly smiled, "Alright then, you can pick the individual, or maybe someone volunteer?" She offered, "I mean they'll be back for lunch soon." 

Your smile widened, "Thank you Allrua,” you thanked the princess, “I'll probably have a volunteer, I don't want to force anyone into anything.”

Coren spoke, “We all know who's going to volunteer first then.” He announced, setting down the piece of item that be had been cleaning. You were sure it was a slat that slotted into the control panel.

You chuckled, “You never know, maybe he'll want bounding time with his Lion – he seems quite attached.” If that was one way to describe it. But then again Lance always looked for ways to get out of things, no matter how much he actually enjoyed it.

But then again the boy though 'forming Voltron' multiple times in one training excessive to say the least on his complaining. Allrua raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything.

-

You sighed as you slid into your seat, seating down cup of juice that vaguely reminded you of drinking orange juce after just have been brushing your teeth, with mint toothpaste.

Grimace, as you set them out perfectly parallel with each other – a past time thing that you had drawn out, you heard the familiar mutters of Coren as he gathered up lunch for the Paladins.

You had offered to help, before getting dismissed. You didn't want to part of the blame anyway, so you smiled, patting him on the shoulder before gathering up the cups.

The door slide open on the opposite side of the dining hall.

Shiro's was the first voice that you comprehended as they draw further into the dining hall, “Great job training today, guys. We're really getting the hang of Voltron.” You smiled at his soft words, that weren't directed at you, warmed your heart nonetheless.

Lance cheered, eyeing up you as he readied to charge at you – and seemed to reconsider his choice. “Seriously, how far do you think my lion kicked that broken alien ship?” He grinned, towards you, “Hey Y/N,” he greeted, “my lion kicked an alien ship by like a mile!” He skipped to the side of you, “My lion has as talented as it's Paladin.”

“Which is little to none,” Keith muttered, “I mean, kicking  _will_ come in handy when the Galra challenges Voltron to a soccer match.”

“Hey,” Lance scuffled, offended, “I did something cool and you can't handle it. I get it.” he added dismissively.

The other boy's twisted in frustration, eyes narrowing as he stared Lance down, “Your kick ruined our balance. We fell.” He accused, voice rough and low.

Lance shrugged lazily under his glaze, “Well that falling part was Hunk's fault.” He managed, sitting himself down.

“Hey!” Hunk protested, being the last to come into the room, brow creasing on his forehead.

Shiro sighed, “All right, save your energy for fighting Zarkon.” He gave a tired smile in your direction as everyone settled down to their seats, “Afternoon Y/N.” He greeted charmingly.

You smiled, “Afternoon Shiro and Everyone else.” You greeted in return, as everyone greeted you in return, “And Lance.” You added, as he raised an eyebrow at you. He smiled.

Coran walked in, carrying in the dish, his eyes bright, “Hello guys! How was the Voltron workout?” He set the plate down, hands sitting on his hips as he awaited a reply.

“We're getting here.” Shire replied for the team, “Are you and Allura almost down fixing the Castle so we can leave this planet? I feel like we're sitting ducks here on Arus.” He explained patiently, eyes casting over the table.

Coran smiled, “Just about. In the meantime, to get your minds off those duck seats you're worried about, I made you guys an authentic ancient paladin lunch!” He announced, earning a collective groans around the table. You managed to refrain yours – after all you knew it was coming.

Lance shoot you a glare, and you managed a shrug in reply, “I did offer.” You managed, shuffling away the chair, as the food's scent drifted to you down in waves. You suddenly felt ill.

Lance sighed, slumping in his seat. “Hungry – again.” You heard under his breath.

“Tomorrow,” you promised, knowing fully well that maybe your food would probably taste just as worst.

Keith snorted, as Hunk spoke, eyes looking down at the plate of goo, not having the willpower to hide his distaste, “Coren, you just got me hooked on that goo and now you're switching it up?” You had never heard his use such a pleading tone before. You found yourself fighting back laughter, feeling a little bit a guilt chocking at you.

Coran's brow creased with worry, but otherwise seemed oblivious for the pale faces that weighed the plate with no small amount of disdain. “This is packed with nutrients.”

Hunk leaned forward, eyes watering as he pulled away, pinching his nose, “Oh! It smells disgusting.” He grasped, voice weak.

Coran sniffs, but seemingly pleased with himself, “I know! That's how you know it's healthy.” You sighed, looking around the room, mentally sorting through the faces of those you surrounded yourself with. One wasn't present.

“Coran, we're on a planet now with fresh herbs, spices, and whatever this thing is. A tuber? Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to head back to the kitchen and spice things up.” The boy in yellow, gathered the plate up cautiously, stalking into the kitchen hastily.

“Where's Pidge?” You asked, as Shiro's eyes scanned the group, apparently coming to the same conclusion as you.

Coran shrugged, “He's probably checking on those prisoners we rescued from Zarkon. They'll all be waking soon in the infirmary.”

You stood, “I'll go after him, I've never been there anyway -”  _that was the only room, I haven't been in, that I'm aware of._ You didn't add, “-I need to check out the tech, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious.”

Shiro followed suit, “And I show you there.” He offered immediately, looking away from Coran who offered him the bowl.

“Open the hatch,' Coran cooed, edging closer to the leader of the paladins, “Food lion coming in!” Have Coran imitate a motherly figure, whilst making airplane flying with his mouth, had to be the most amusing things that you had ever witnessed. You chuckled, as Shiro blushed, brushing passed the man, groaning, “No. Just...” his cleared his throat, joining you, “no.”

Coran sighed, “You don't know what you're missing!” He called out as Shiro lead you out,  ignoring him to further his embarrassment.

-

A silence enveloped the both of you as you casually walked the corridors, that looked strikingly different than that at night. Sometimes the hallway at night would light up, others would remain dormant, and casting darker shadows. You often tried to run those corridors, realizing how unnerving the complete dark was. Shiro laughed at you when you attempted a couple of hallways, and eventually just gave up from keeping up with you and sometimes joined you. Other's he would grab your arm and draw you closer to him.

You had no idea why the dark frightened you. Though you had a suspicious that it was because it was utterly dark, no starlight, no moonlight. Just nothing.

And nothing become something you feared. You carved a fullness you never had before.

“How were the team today?” You asked, breaking the silence that coated you to.

He grinned, “We're getting there,” he replied, “I feel as though we're getting somewhere.” He explained, with a pleased expression on his face.

You flashed him a smile, “And it's obviously becoming more enjoyable with the group, now they're seeing improvement. It'll be awarding.”

He nodded his agreement, “But soon they'll feel a different sort of disconnection I think.” He mumbled, mostly to himself.

You frowned, “Oh?”

He shrugged, shaking his head, “Homesickness, they'll just kids. Everyone seems to forget that, even themselves sometimes.”

You felt your brow crease as you thought over his words, “Oh, I see.” Once you had suffered from homesickness – just after your schooling actually. Leaving home completely was heart-retching, and the army seemed to know exactly how to deal with it. Keep you busy and on your toes. But it soon passed as your brother joined you. And then you were the one to comfort.

You felt your heart harden at his image, shoulders slumping under the weight – you knew what missing someone was like. You suffered from it everyday. Shiro nodded again, sharply, eyes flickering over you in concern, but before he could arise the topic, he paused, the doors sliding open.

The room expanded out in what seemed like a semi-circle. Darker than most room, in a blue, purplish light, pods were set around. You had been told of the prisoners early on in the month, somehow slipping out. You were aware of them rescuing those who were kept on the Galra ship – but you weren't aware of their dominate behaviour and found it oddly disturbing.

No matter how much you told yourself that it was just like sleeping – for a long time – like a coma –  _standing_ up.

Then the discomfort set in, as you drew into the room. You shoved it aside, as you took in the young Paladin, who sat at the steps. Shiro was the first to break the silence, that was caused with no greeting. “You're as anxious as me.”

Pidge replied immediately, eyes flickering over the more senior members of the group, “These aliens we saved know something about my family. They have to!”

You sighed, seating yourself down next the young individual, patting  _her_ \- his knee, as Shiro approached closer, eyes sad, “I hope so.” He admitted, eyes wondering to the pods.

Pidge's eyebrows shot up, “They recognized you, didn't they? They called you “Champion.” What does that even mean?”

You froze, brows pitching together.  _Champion..._ you knew he didn't tell you much about his own problems – but this...? You had no idea he had kept this tight lipped.

He sent you an apologetic downward turn of his lips, “I don't know. I can't remember very much from that time. But the way those guys looked at me when we freed them...  _I_ don't know if I want to find out.” He admitted, seemingly slipping half his secrets in a clap.

Shiro was a stranger before, but you had hoped that maybe he would become more recognizable through the times of the nightly walks. Now he couldn't come across as more of a stranger as when you first meet him.

And you weren't even angry.


	13. Chapter Thirteen - Word's Bitterness

You blinked rapidly towards the handsome stranger, as he directly avoided eye contact with you. You sighed, giving up entirely in trying to communicate with him and stood, feeling your knees clicked and you sighed again, as you relaxed. Stepping up to the nearest pod, you pressed your palm against it, vaguely aware of the familiar imagery piecing together. You shook the picture away, hand immediately cool from the glass cage that held the prisoners.

It exhaled sharply, eyes flickering as it fought conscience. You grasped, “Shiro? Pidge?” You called, as they ended their conversation, “I think they're awakening.”

They were awakening. Breathing in a matter-of-fact. Pidge charged over, nose pressed to the glass, analyzing it's movements. The glass slide to the side as it came around, eyes blinking furiously even in the dim light. You stepped back, hand on your throat. “I'll get the blankets,” you managed, as Shiro rushed forward, helping the former Galra prisoner onto it's feet. “And a drink.”

-

You had finally down it. You had given out all the drinks and blankets that you could gather and give, aware of Pidge settling down next to the one that had awoken first, “So, how long were you help captive by Zarkon?” He asked, voice uncertain as he eyed the trembling alien up.

The Alien shrugged, “Some for years,” he rasped, eyes drifting over the room, before watching Shiro approach him, wary, “Decades, maybe. It's hard to tell. Time becomes a blur.” He managed admittedly.

Pidge gave the prisoner a half-hearted smile, “Then you must have been there when my dad and brother arrived. Sam and Matt Holt?” He asked hopefully,

The prisoner shrugged again, “I never knew their names, but I certainly remember the other two Earthlings that arrived with Champion.” He nodded curtly to Shiro, who did a good job of looking uncomfortable with the title.

Champion... something whispered. You drew closer to the alien, eyes watching him take a sip of his hot drink.

Shiro's head tilted to the side, eyebrows pitching together in his own frustration, “”Champion.” Why do you keep calling me that?”

The Former Galra Prisoner's frown-line shot up, as though surprised, “You really don't remember?” He mumbled through his hoarse voice, “Unbelievable! You were a legendary gladiator, undefeated in the ring,” he explained, his voice getting stronger, “You defeated an infamous Glara gladiator known as Myzax. That was the day you earned the name “Champion.” I was there, as was the young Earthling.

Shiro's mouth worked, as the rest of the alien jeered nosily through the room.

The Prisoner didn't seem affected by it, “We were all prisoners, forced to fight for the entertainment of Zarkon. That day, we were set to fight Myzax, a vile beast many thought could never be defeated-"

And he defeated it. You shook the thought aside.

“Slaughter awaited us all,” he continued, aware of Shiro's paling face, eyes widening. “This “Matt” was the first of us sent to fight. But fate how other plans-”

Shiro intervened. You frowned, not knowing entirely where the thought came from.

“-You were so thirsty for blood, you injured your fellow Earthling.” He ended, coming to see Shiro's wide-eyed expression, that was white as a sheet. It was the first time you had seen Shiro panic. Pidge stood, eyes flaring, “You attacked my brother?” He managed with a cry, “Why?"

Shiro shook his head, bewildered, “N-no, it can't be true.” His eyes seemed to plead.

The Prisoner shrugged, “I was there. We all were.” The crowd agreed and you found yourself stepping up to clasp Shiro's shoulder to comfort him.

Pidge finally settled back down, “After my brother was injured, where was he taken?” He asked raggedly,

He shrugged, “I know not.”

Shiro's mouth was still slack with shock, he unconsciously leaned into your comforting hand of his shoulder, “I don't believe it. There's got to be more to the story. I-I couldn't have hurt my friend,” he stammered, “Wait. That ship we were held captive on crash-landed on this planet. They'll have logs of prisoners, some information.” He thought aloud. And you already knew you wouldn't join him. Pidge agreed in his throat, “I'm coming with you."

You let go of his shoulder, stepping back, nodding.

-

You were left alone. Everyone seemed to be anywhere but the castle – and you didn't know your way around from the ground. Gritting your teeth, you turned up the speaker, hearing the conversation of each headset. The screens lighting up your features as you studied their patterns. Sighing heavily, seating yourself on the nearest step, slightly comforted with their voices talking in the background. You stared expectantly at the corner. Nothing remained and yet something tugged at your mind.

Groaning, you tried to relax, eyes lazily drifting across the room, before halting at the entrance. The door slide open, and to armored creatures stepped through, looking powerful in their purple tinted clothing and appearance.

Your heart twisted, coming up into your throat as you stood, “What are you doing here?” You managed through a loud tone, breath hitching in your throat.

The nearest bared it's fangs, seemingly more amused, “Earthling,” it greeted, it's yellow eyes regarded you.

Your muscles froze, “And who are you?” Though you knew the answer. Garla. The enemy.

It chuckled, approaching you with grace of a feline. You fought your muscles into movement. You stepped backward, hand reach up to shield the blow, that you sensed would land in your rib-cage. His fist moved through you.

You stumbled backwards, falling hard as your stumbled bewildered to the control panel.

“I am the Garla. You are an Earthling.” He replied, voice monotone, stepping over you as through you were the animal.

“Yes,” you breathed, “I am an Earthling.” Jolting quickly away, you attempted to bare your own teeth into a snarl. I promised myself.

His laughter came again, knelling down to your height, yellow eyes still regarding you. “Are you going to help them, Earthling,” He cooed sweetly, as alarms blared to life.

You sat dried mouth, as he reached out and in. Through you as through was a projection of a sort. And he was. “Yes.” You replied firmly, trying to gather up the courage that was kept inside for you for too long. “I will help them.”

“So be it,” He sneered, fingers projecting across your chin, before the image faulted and the disappeared completely. You found your strength as you screamed.

Hurtling to your feet, you stumbled towards the control panel, eyes burning. Your soul burning. You sobbed, falling hard on your knees. You knew deep down this was happening, but you never knew the Schizophrenia would affect you – surely this was something to do was PTSD. Right?

No. PTSD were made up of the events that had happened. Schizophrenia wasn't.

Through blurry eyes, you weakly stumbled to gather up footage of the thing the broke the atmosphere. Or had been, you thought numbly, realizing that Voltron was already engaged.

You groaned, pressing your forehead onto the cool platform, as the panic set in. I'm not going to get through this, you mind chanted, even through deep down, a resistance fought for the hope that'll it be a passing thing.

But you knew that your illness wouldn't, even deeper down.

Grasping as you fought to keep yourself in control of your trembling hands, and fading mind. You set a headpiece on your head – something that you had feverishly tried to work on for weeks now, and hooked it up, before your passed out with a weak attempt at a curse.

-

You awoke with a groan, finishing off the curse. You groaned again as a heartache arose. Shiro face peered over, brows pressed together – a facial that he couldn't completely shake off for the last couple of days. “Y/N?” He asked, voice low.

You winced, pulling yourself up into a sitting position, “Yeah?” You managed through gritted teeth, hand reaching out to rub your temples.

He sighed in relief, “What happened?” He asked, moving to collect a glass of water for the side table. You blinked furiously as you took in your room. He offered you the drink, allowing you to collect your thoughts.

You frowned, before smiling as you accepted the cup, “Arrrr...” you grumbled, wincing as you took a sip, “I passed out.” You stated firmly, knowing that was the truth.

A soft smile tugged on his lips, “I know that,” he said softly, his breath warm on your face. You were sitting so close to them, you thought alarmed.

You licked your lips, gathering what memories that floated in the corner of your mind. “I- I fall and hit my head. I think.”

“You think, huh?” Shiro asked, breathlessly, looking at you from the corner of his eyes, facing towards the end of the room.

You nodded furiously, a smile tugging at the edge of your lips. “I think.” You repeated for him, making sure to sound as sincere as possible. After all you were sincere in your lying. You meant in the most caring way possible.

After all if you actually told him what had happened, he'd rethink his opinion on you and then maybe consider you with different eyes. You pursed your lips, “I tripped over my feet,” - common enough - “and hit my head on the control panel.” You explained, hoping to strengthen the lie.

Which almost worked.

Shiro frowned, as he sighed heavily, “Are you keeping information from me because of what I kept from-?” He began asking,

You shrugged, “Me? No. I can't be angry with you. I somehow knew there wasn't a lot you were telling me – after all, I did seem to do all the talking.”

Those words didn't comfort the man in black, “Y/N,” he tried again, lips thinning, “all I told you wasn't fake, if that's what your thinking.”

“I'm not saying that, Shiro,” You said sharply, your cheeks warming, giving away your actual thoughts. “You have a right to your own thoughts,” you tried to correct, “I don't. If I told you all my problems, you don't have to feel pressured into telling me anything.” You had enough grace to have accepted that from the start at least.

“But I do, Y/N,” he admitted sheepishly, “we have a mutual understanding in here;” he tapped his forehead, “I did say I would be here for you – and I meant it. But how can I do that, if I don't show you that you're not alone?”

He was thinking into this maybe a bit too far – but it made sense. You understood where his thoughts lead. You shrugged, unable to produce words. “I've always been alone.” You assured him, although your words had the complete opposite effect on him.

“That doesn't mean that you have to stay that way.” he replied kindly.

You chuckled, startling both you and the Leader of Paladins, “It means that I will always – deep down – be this way, Shiro. No matter how many people greet me in the day, or how many counseling nights I walk. I will always be alone.” You managed, bitterly, feeling the weight lift off your shoulders.

Shiro's eyes narrowed, “Where is this coming from?” He asked, voice low.

“It's always been there, Shiro. You and the rest of the group is great but-” you started,

“But you feel alone?” he injected, roughly, looking hurt, “You are only alone, because you believe, you will always been alone.” He accused, voice rising in protest to your words, “You want to get better? Allrua told me you wanted to check out the helmet, I will help you - but first you have to start believing in yourself. Stop making promises to yourself that you believe you can't keep. That's the only way you can recover."

Every single word was a direct hit to your heart, you felt your eyes stinging and head bow as you knotted your fingers together in frustration. He was right. Hitting the nail in the head. Bam! He had you pinned and you knew he was right. But it didn't help it from stinging. “You wouldn't understand-” you tried, eyes flashing back to the Garla's presence... the helmets... the doorknob.

“Where is this coming coming?”

You blinked, “Deep down,” you managed, feeling your throat tighten, “I feel a those I will become a burden to you soon enough-”

“You aren't a burden!” He protested. Eyes glowing, “You are part of the team now. I don't care if you have PTSD. I don't care if you are scared of the dark. I don't care if I have to throw myself in front of the firing line for you, Y/N. You aren't the burden here, if you leave you will be.” He stood, eyes still blazing.

You lay there speechless as you meet his eyes. You hoped you eyes burned as much as his did.

“Now, we've already eaten, Hunk offered cook your meal. He'll be here soon. Tonight, meet me in our usual spot – we have a lot of things to talk about.”


	14. Chapter Fourteen - Feeling's Edge

To Shiro's word, Hunk came in minutes later after Shiro left. You didn't watch him leave, fingers tracing over the duvet that was draped over your body, heavy against your skin. You sighed as the door slid open, Hunk carrying in a tray, a assured smile tugging on his lips, looking as uncertain as he could with that expression. “I assure you Coren did not make this.” He started without a greeting, unsure on how to start the conversation.

You mustered by an encouraging smile, but remained smile.

You have tried to keep conversation with the heartfelt kid, but you couldn't manage to push the conversation on, you tiredness seeping into the your mind and all you could do was yawn, nodding lazily as you listened to him speak. Fighting the urge to close your eyes, reasoning that you had slept long enough, you tried to continue the conversation.

But even Hunk sensed your tiredness and departed after you had eaten.

Then sleep wouldn't claim you. You knew that this would happen, after all you expected the worse – and this happened to be it. Too tired to communicate, but too awake to sleep. All you could do was mull of the last words Shiro had spoken to you and all you could do was feel the lead settle in your stomach as the situation evolved and eventually grew to out of proportion that you would have to tell yourself that it wasn't what he had meant.

You had a wild imagination.

Sighing you waited until the time came for you to meet Shiro. Huffing loudly, you sunk into your mattress, pulling the duvet up over your head, and relaxing as the familiar warmth enveloped you. Staying like this, until you felt like your were suffocating, you tucked into under your chin, staring intently at the ceiling. Your eyelids drooped and you fall into oblivion.

-

You awoke late, flinching awake, you stumbled out of bed. Carding your fingers through your hair, you struggled with your wild bed hair, before changing quickly. You knew you had awoken late – and the lead settled into the pit of your stomach, making you feeling nauseous. What if he had thought you had chickened out?

What if he thought you had left him?

The last one was by the far the worst. Skidding to the door, as it slide open, you stumbled into the hall, knowing fully well that everyone would be dead to the world, as you passed. Running lately, you managed to make it to the dining hall, in a record amount of time, breathing heavily and in denial that you seriously needed to excercise. Breathing hard, you draw to the table, Shiro wasn't present.

Your heart dropped into your stomach joining the lead of panic and guilt. You groaned, pressed your forehead on the cool material of the back of the chair, “Dammit!” You swore, hissing under your breath. You kicked the chair, wincing as the pain erupted. 

Your pain only fueled your anger towards yourself.

You could never be angry at Shiro, but at yourself – most definitely. You were always anger at your own neglection towards yourself. Angry that you never seemed to get anything right.

Gathering up your dwelling calmness, you limped towards the way you and Shiro had walked first as the night started. You knew there was areas that he could be at, you reasoned with yourself, hopeful. Hurrying down the corridors, you smarted toe eventually lost the pain, and returned to normal – which you were grateful for. You walked the same corridors you had walked before with your companion, nearly every night. Now it seemed lonely to walk it as one individual.

You angry ebbing slowly, your shoulder slumped, the darkness pushing inwards, heaving on your shoulders. Taunting you of the emptiness that your feared.

Lost in thoughts, you pressed onward, passing corridors that lit up with your pressure of your feet, others that dwelt in complete darkness. You came to the Control Room, pausing in the doorway as the doors slide open. Shiro sat on the floor, back facing you as he stared out.

Unsure whether to approach now of your lateness, you hovered uncomfortably there, stepping only to allow the doors to close. Shiro looked over his shoulder, the night sky's stars illuminating his figure. Eyes dark, as he stared at your, his white strand of hair glowing against the suns that glow millions of light years away. But still he said no word.

“Sorry,” you apologized instantly, “I fall asleep after Hunk left, I didn't mean to.”

Suddenly, he smiled, even though you couldn't see his eyes against the darkness, you could feel his intense glaze soften, “That's good to hear you have been able to sleep.” His voice warm and patient.

You manged a smile in return as you approached him, “The bed has finally accepted me as it's own,” you attempted at humor.

He chuckled, as you seated yourself next to him, looking back out to the stars. Then could your see his eyes, dark grey, and worried. “Y/N...” he finally started after a pause of silence.

You looked away quickly, “Shiro.” You offered in return, eyes drifting to your lap.

He looked at you, he tipped slightly to examine you, lips tugging into a soft, supportive smile, “I meant what I said, you don't have to remain lonely, Y/N. You deserve better, even if you don't understand it.” There was another silence.

He sighed, “I understand, I sometimes feel lonely, sometimes friendship can't seem to touch that one thing within us,”

You eyes drew to his arm, made by the enemies he know fought with. The people that kept him. It flexed as he shifted position, enabling him to looked at you better. It flickered against the stars, momentarily. When you first had paid attention to it, you knew it was a masterpiece, enabling him to do things that he wished he couldn't do.

But now that was who he was. And he dealt with it as humanly possible.

His eyes followed yourself, a pink hue barely inaudible against the dim room as he realized what held your attention. He flexed that wrist, “then I realised that I would have to help myself if they couldn't. So I managed to hide it away until it turn transparent. I still believe that better things could happen without me, but I have to then realise that what if  _I weren't_ here. Either still on the Garla ship or on Earth somewhere. I can do my best in protecting those I care about here, not there. I can do good things - better things here. And I don't have to be lonely to do that.” He paused, making sure you were still paying attention.

And in all honesty you were. Shocked by the confession. Stopped rigid.

“They are the reason I see how I see. They don't completely understand. But they care and that's enough.”

You smiled, resting your head on his shoulder, “Thank you Shiro.”

He leant into your touch, his warmth wrapping around you. “You're not a burden –  _never_.” He whispered, into your hair as you drifted off to sleep again, protesting loudly in your throat. You forced your eyes open.

“Then why do I feel it?” You murmured into his shoulder.

Shiro managed a soft smile, “Because you want to believe that you are, Y/N. It's time to stop it.”

“Stop it,” You repeated, softly, eyes considering the man you leant on. The lines in his face, the sharpness of his chin, the highness of his cheekbones. Gentles eyes. Soft looking lips. The general openness of his face. The scar that ran across the bridge of his nose.

He nodded, meeting your eyes, “Yes, and I'll help you.”

You frowned, drawing your head away from his shoulder, “Now?” You asked loudly, coming out more of a protest than anything.

Shiro laughed, “No. When you're ready to let go completely.”

Something told you:  _never_. You fought yourself to nod though, hands shaking. Shiro clasped it, squeezing it, reassuringly “Soon.” He whispered as though he knew what brushed against your mind. “Soon Y/N.” He repeated, the words firm on his tongue.

“Yeah, soon.” You confirmed, squeezing back. Shiro smiled sadly.

-

You sat in silence for what seemed like hours, though you knew one only passed. You remained sitting yourself next to him, staring out into the night. The stars burning brightly and steadily, burning their imagery into your eyes. Leaving them behind your eyelids.

It was a comfortable silence, as both you stared out, eyes watching void of space stretch out, further than the eyes could comprehend – and even further again.

“Shiro?” You whispered, surprised by your own voice against the quite. Trying to keep away the darkness that clung to the walls and breath your very air. But you felt safe with him – you would be okay.

He looked over to your briefly, “Yes?”

“You can tell me anything you want, Shiro. I'm here for you as much as you are here for me.” You mumbled, snuffling at a yawn.

He chuckled, a pink hue blooming across his cheeks, “I guess I owe you that.”

You cleared your thought, grinning, “Maybe. But then I said I didn't care.” You clarified, soundly.

He grinned back, “But you do?” He asked. You looked at him sharply to make sure there was nothing but sincerity. You didn't even know why you checked – it was after all Shiro you were talking to.

You sighed, “A little.”

“A little,” he mimicked distantly, “how about  _quiet a bit_?”

You clicked your tongue, “Quite a little.” You adjusted, causing the Leader of Paladins to laugh again. You loved his laugh, and often had heard it, amongst all the roar of the other Paladins. It was beautiful and true.  _True._

_Truth..._

_You want to know that?_

“Sure, keep telling yourself that.” He jibed, sending you a doubtful look. You didn't rise to it, instead you shrugged, falling silent again. _Do you?_ Your mind traveling to the ends of the galaxy then back again.  _Go._

You pushed the thought aside, and seemingly concern, Shiro leant forward, “Y/N?” He asked, drawing you from your trace.

You forced a smile to your lips, heart letting out a dull thud against your rib-cage. “Sorry,” you mumbled, “daydreaming.” You explained weakly, eyes searching his face as he relaxed.

“Are you sure?” He asked, to reassure himself.

You nodded furiously, “Yes, I'm positive on that one.” You felt yourself smile as smile return to his lips, gracing his face in a bright light.

The space between you seemed to narrow, before drawing off completely, as you drew forward, your only focus was trained on the man before you. You actually didn't know what was happening, before you felt your eyelids close as your lips brushed together. Heart in your throat, his hand drew you closer, it's gentle grasp warm on the nip of your neck. Your lips pressed together then.

People spoke of fireworks when one connected... you felt a slow burning in your chest, the tenderness that clasped onto you mind as you meet Shiro's lips, feeling yourself drowning in the feeling of warmth as though his mind invaded your's. As though you could feel the sincerity, the passion – the burning of his mind as it worked. You mind plummeting open as the beauty crushed the very being your existence, remaking the sewing of your wounds. Rehearsing your lines of the future.

It felt as though there was nothing but him and the powerful sense of  _being._ As though you were one and the same.

Your lips moved, soft and tender against each other, hands tangling in his hair as you deepened the intense beauty that flooded your existence and washed you out.

As far as you were concerned, there was nothing else existing.

He responded, mouth parting, kisses growing as he hesitantly dominated you physically and mentally. You both parted, breathing hard, brushing against each other's faces as you considered each other. His eyes dark against the mellow light, but warm and loving.

And somehow it felt wrong.


	15. Chapter Fifteen - Demon's Inside

Another part of you was ablaze, burning brightly from the feeling of his lips. You meet his eyes again, his own eyes flickering in the dim light. Like complete understanding on every level, and yet the wrongness remained. You heart twisted in it's cage, pounding against it. 

And another repelled. 

You felt your lips draw into a smile, etching onto your shadowed facials. The burning settling in the bottom of your heart. The cold remained into enclosed around it. 

"Shiro?" You whispered, voice catching as a slow smile drew on his own lips, a dusting of pink coming across his cheeks as you directed you attention to him, eyes drawing away from your attentive glaze. 

"Y/N?" He replied softly, eyes adjusting fully back to you. He was beautiful, as your you were confused. Torn between something you understood, and something you didn't. 

You kissed him again, the feeling of darkness threatening to consume you. And you fought back. There was a reason you felt this way towards Shiro, positive and negative. 

Negative had to be grounded from the base of you instability. The positive was one you never felt before, towards another - a burning, that lingered across your skin, a longing building in your heart.

Both sides fought, and you fought back. You had no idea how, but you knew why.  

Shiro responded, leaning in placing his lips firmly on yours, his presence commanding attention from your senses, seemingly fighting back against the darkness the lingered there. His warmth brushed itself against your cheeks, dwelling downwards, encircling your neck and tightening your chest. Before releasing. 

The bliss swept over you, tangling in your hair and within your thoughts. The wrongness settling down against your feet, aching through your legs. It felt as though you were being taken over and only Shiro was withholding it's cruel hold. 

He drew away, eyes lowing down to meet yours. You reached out to brush your fingers against his chin, frightened of what would come if you allowed yourself to drift away. 

Another part knew you would soon leave. 

His skin was warm and smooth, a hint of a facial hair under the skin. You broke the eye contact, drawing your fingers to his lips and briefly touching them, against the curve of his mouth, before standing.

"Goodnight Shiro," you whispered gently, eyes drawing to meet his. A strong compassion lingered there in his prominent glaze. He stood as well, yet towering over you, head bowed. "Goodnight, Y/N." He breathed out, eyes scanning your facials for any negative emotions that could linger there. 

You offered him a smile, leaving the darkness creep up into your stomach again. But it was time to depart, even if you didn't want to. He smiled back, "See you in the morning." He murmured softly, both of you ignoring the fact that it was indeed early morning already. His prosthetic arm reaching out, and squeezing gently at your fingers. 

"See you in the morning," you repeated back, with a broader smile, squeezing back. 

-

You awoke much later than you intended, falling out of bed with a painful thud, and groaning on the floor, breathing heavy against your throat as you straggled to breath. The pain was intense in your dream, that you believed it to be real. You always believed your dreams were real at the time, but the pain in your chest was anything but helpful in this case. 

You groaned, as you draw yourself onto your knees, palms pressed against the floor as you panted. Dark shadows lingered in your mind, over stretching your very person, clouding your judgement as you patted towards the bed. 

Finally finding it weakly, you drew yourself into the mattress again. Slumping heavily into the pillows, you waited for your mind to adjust, staring blankly at the ceiling. 

This was not something to think about after having shared a kiss with the attractive, attentive Leader of the Paladins, you thought with a frown, finally sitting up to analyse the room. You knew that nothing could 'trigger' you off, within these walls, but punishing yourself by checking had become a daily thing. 

Swinging your aching feet, gingerly over the side, you swore. Your feet positively ached, feeling as though they had been bruised, you expected purple and green markings of sworn skin to be stretching against the ridge of your feet, and on the bridge. You winced as you stood, examining them briefly. Nothing. 

So it had to be nothing. 

You changed quickly, fighting to double check the tenderness on the souls of your feet. Limping to the door, your watched it slide open, pausing for a moment to double check it's surface. Nothing weaved into your vision, and with another frown, you scowled, falling in behind Lance, who walked in front towards the dining hall. 

Lance looked over his shoulder, "Ah! Y/N!" He greeted, a wide toothy smile, radiating on his face. He stopped and waited for you to join him. 

"Morning, Lance," You greeted, trying to match his smile, though you doubted it went anywhere near, "how are you this morning?" 

He shrugged, "Good, never been better. Actually no," he seemed to considered, "I lie, I have been better. But I feel as good as I think I can feel without being home. You get me?" He rambled, 

You nodded, though you felt you had no understanding of his situation. But you  _knew_ you had understood once - not in that concept of course, but something that could relate. 

His eyebrows drew together, lips tugging downwards, "Do you?" he asked, even though he saw your nod. 

You offered him a frown in return, "Of course, I get you. I've been homesick before." 

He pouted, "I wouldn't call it:  _homesick_." He drooled out, flashing you something between hurt pride and uncertainty. 

You gave a lazy roll of your shoulders, "Sure. Call it,  _Earthsickness_  then. You miss familiarity." 

He gave you a long look, unable to comprehend whether you were joking or not. He decided it was the last, "Pfft, I forget that you were a teacher sometimes." 

You smiled, tipping your head to the side, "And what does that mean?"

He grinned, "It means, you know a way to see through people. I'm pretty sure, we discredit for teachers in a lot of areas. And understanding people is one of them."

"All students do it to a certain degree, I guess," you mustered, "it's  _character building._ " 

He waved the name aside, "Hey, and all the character building I got from teachers was seer rebel, and a talent to sleep undetected." 

He had no idea where the conversation was going, and so you left it at that. After all it had turned to a part of conversation that you weren't partially trying to point out. After all, Lance never had done that in your classes. 

Maybe he was lying, which you doubted. Or maybe he just preferred your classes, which you also doubted. 

Stretching the truth - maybe a little. 

"Are there any plans for today?" You asked, changing the subject. 

He shrugged, "Well when we found you in the Control Room, the King of... whatever, called off the celebration he wanted to call. Said he'll hold it when you were well. So tonight, we are going to drink juice and talk, I dunno really. After that I dunno. New day!" 

Grimace, you looked at Lance, "I'd preferred if you party-ed yesterday," and then you shrugged it off. 

His grin returned, "Come on there, Y/N! Can't have one of the godly people missed a party hosted by it's people, now can we?" He asked, even though your knew it wasn't a question. 

"Godly?" You asked, with a frown again. 

He nodded, "The natives are convinced the Allrua, is some god-being, there to have judgement - or something like that." 

"To give judgement," you corrected, 

He gave you a look that suggested that he preferred if you hadn't said anything. But he had to learn, you were one with words, you learned that words were powerful. Using them incorrectly, had a way with you, that you preferred to leave alone. "Sure," he hissed through his teeth, "Give judgement," he adjusted, "you are apart of the team, so they consider you something special too...." he trailed off, eyebrow raised, "which leads me to another topic." He purred, and then did you understand how he managed to have a way with the ladies. 

You groaned, "By the sounds of your voice, do I want to be apart of this topic?" 

A devilish smile spread across his lips, "Oh, you're already apart of the topic actually - one of the leading roles in fact." he jibed, with a overly cheerful tone. And you knew you had it coming. 

"Oh," you managed lamely, trying to piece together: team and special. 

"Yeah," a smirk tugged on his lips, appearing more devilish than his previous smile, his eyes shining with a childish enjoyment, "And Shiro is too, in fact. So no sweating." 

 _No sweating,_ right cause that's easy, considering that you kissed him yesterday. Now you weren't embarrassment to have kissed him, you were just sincere about it. 

You had no idea if Shiro wanted it publicly known or not, and as far as things were actually serious between you and Shiro, it was a easy bet to say that he'd want it quite. 

"Oh," you managed again, clearing your throat, "no sweating?" you repeated for him, "And what is that suppose to mea-?" You attempted as changing the subject. 

He sighed, "Nope! Nothing!" He replied, "Back to the topic at hand..."

You crossed your arms over your chest, trying to appear annoyed than anything. But as far as everyone was considered - yourself included - you were transparent. Anything to work on, you thought with no small amount of bitterness. 

"... you and Shiro. Now yesterday, I felt maybe something... I dunno... different about Shiro. He is a caring person, sure. Goes out of his way to do something, yeah - all the time. But then, I noticed he was quite tender towards you -  _in a different way -_ not in the way of Pidge-or-Keith-or-Allrua-or-just-everyone-in-general- gets-hurt- tender, but something different." He put his fingers to his chin, lips drawing in a thing line as he pretended to consider what he had said. 

You mouth worked, but no words came out, the feeling of being pulled under threatening to take physically under. 

He grinned again, the light in his eyes intensifying, "You've got a special admirer." He finished, 

You were like a rodent in the spotlight, you were speechless beyond thinking. You shook your head to bring thoughts back into your head, "I-I," you stammered, unable to string a sentence. 

It suddenly felt like you were in a class again, being asked why the world turned. It was simple, it a sense if you understood it. But usually your intelligence seemed to bleed out, and you would be speaking words of a kindergartner.

He nodded, "Speechless are we?" He teased, "Don't worry-" he started, 

You forced yourself to answer, with a wrack to his arm. He winced, yelping away, "What was that for?" He accused, pouting. 

You didn't want to say nothing, you didn't want to cause offence. Even if you denied your attraction towards him, and his to you, you were bound to feel guilty - even if he didn't hear. You shrugged, "Because you deserve it," you hissed out, considering your options.

"I  _deserved it_ ," he mimicked, looking hurt. Suddenly he smiled, "Oh!" he purred, "I see, you're secrets safe with me."

You hoped he hadn't seen through any of it, but he thought he knew something - so you were gonna give it to him. After all it couldn't be far from the truth at all, _and_  you could trust him. He wasn't someone to spit out things like that, especially if it was towards others he considered with some amount of respect. "I have no secrets," you replied, though you knew you had. You had demons and they had you.


	16. Chapter Sixteen - Everyone's Confusion

You watched with an attentive glaze as the Arusians whom demonstrated the attack and victorious win of the Garla, and of Voltron, the King's surprisingly loud cut through your dwelling attention, "...No. I said, Voltron was victorious!" He corrected, as his people stumbled to adjust their acting. 

You smiled as they collapsed again, sending the Arusians to cheer. Such merry people, you thought with no small amount of longing.

"Thank you, Your Majesty, for that..." Allura started, unsure on what to say, "wonderful production." she managed with a small smile, "It saddens me that we must leave tomorrow, but we must continue our battle with Zarkon and spread peace throughout the universe."

You knew that you had slowed down the process Allura wanted to pace at, but you didn't know it was the soon they wanted to depart. But saving the world, you thought with a small ting of respect, meant moving. 

Bending down the princess cautiously gifts the king an communicator, her eyes suddenly serious, "Your Highness..." she offered, directing all her attention to the small native, "please accept this gift. This will allow you to contact us anytime you need help. Arus will be the first planet in the Voltron Alliance." 

First. Meaning she sorted out more, which undoubtedly sounded sensible and like Allura. Straight to the point. And you always mingled to the side, moving around it. 

Maybe once ago, you were straight forward and sure. But now... it was obvious that you lacked in the confidence to do so. Making decisions required a person with confidence. 

The Arusian King cheered, his arms lifting up above his head, holding the small device to the crowd. His people cheer with him. That's the thing, you thought, civilization like this, that were admittedly simplistic, needed to be protected. Arusian to Garla, would be like a wolf to a flock of sheep. A bee to pollen. Taken or destroyed. 

And by taken, you meant, their freewill taken. 

You sighed stepping down from where you stood, backing into the corners to watch, contemplating whether or not to join Shiro at the entrance. "Y/N!" Lance's voice called, whom stood roughly in the centre, next to Hunk and Keith. You frowned, and obeyed his waving gesture to come forward, "What?" You asked, no entirely sure whether or not to be cautious on what he said - and who he meant it. 

He did after all said your secret - that you hadn't admitted nor denied - would be safe with him. 

"Hunk suggested we have a team cheer, I thought it was a great idea. I mean:  _team spirit_ , am I right?" He grinned, looking over to Keith, who eyed the boy up with no small amount of disdain. Keith pouted, arms crossing over in his chest in an act of defiance.

"Now," the tanned boy continued, "I thought something like, I say 'Vol' and you sat 'Tron." Vol-!"

You felt your give out a shy smile, "Lance-" you started, attempting to quieten the boy, who - somehow - managed to come up with the most unoriginal idea that all the universe had probably come to experience. 

"Vol-tron," Keith snapped, obviously having been targeted about this moments before. 

Lance's lips tugged in between his teeth, as he fought the urge to bait him again. Sadly he couldn't resist, "No! For the last time-!"

Keith's face twisted with anger, "You also said we'd work on it, suggesting  _later!"_

Lance gave a dismissive wave, "I didn't say,  _how later_ , Drop-out," 

You sighed heavily, "Lance enough. I'm sure we'll figure it out in another time." You for one didn't want this fight to unravel over something so inconsequential. Keith relaxed at your input, and smiled at you. Something soft and unsure. 

It was Lance's time to sigh, swirling his drink, "Fine, we'll work on it." He took a sip, before stiffening, face draining of colour and lips twisting as though he had eaten a lemon. He coughed to fight control, and he rasped in Coran's direction, "Coran, what is this?" 

Coren studied the shocked boy, "Oh, this is Nunvill, the nectar of the gods." 

Lance hissed between his teeth, "It tastes like hot dog water and feet!" Now you were definitely wanted to know how he  _knew_ what that tasted like.

You found yourself laughing as Coran answered the stricken boy, "Yeah, makes wonderful hair tonic as well."  Sprinkling the Nunvil onto his ginger mustache, he rubbed it in. The laughter died in your throat. 

Apparently feeling worst than yourself, Lance retched loudly, stiffening up like a broad.

"Lance?" You asked, concerned, "Are you okay?" 

Keith's brow furrowed as he reached out and poked him in the shoulder soundly. Repeating the process, Keith prodded at him again, his frown deepening. "Ah, I don't think he's-" he started, before Lance fall, crashing to the floor. "-okay." he finished, blinking rapidly. 

You chuckled, bending down to his level, as he snapped out of his disgusted trace and drew himself up into a sitting position. "By your reaction I would that you grew an each tongue," you teased, offering him a hand. 

He frowned at it, "I feel like I have," he admitted, before grabbing it. You drew him to his feet, as he swayed unintentionally, face still pitched in the face of death. "and maybe another breathing organ, I feel like I can breath out of both nostrils." He sniffed loudly, as Keith raised an eyebrow. 

"Isn't that impossible?" Keith asked doubtfully. 

"Not with this drink," Lance crowed, inhaling loudly again. 

You shrugged, "I think about 85 percent of people can't breath out of both at the same time." All three boys blinked at you, and all you could was shrug again, "One day I was bored."

"And you search up: 'Nostril breathing patterns'?" Lance asked, unable to hide his uncertainty towards the topic.

"I was eight." You replied, with a half-heart wave.

"Searching up 'nostril breathing patterns'" Keith supplied for Lance, who remained silent, looking as doubtful as the other. 

You nodded, "So? I know there's are worst things to search up - even now as an adult." 

Keith snorted, taking a sip out of his own drink, mindlessly. You winced, and stepped back, Lance staggering towards you, in an attempt to hide behind you. Keith's face froze, shoulders tensing as he spat it out, coughing loudly. 

Hunk froze, the Nunvil dripping down his chin, as he spun around wildly, before turning back again, putting the Arusian food to his eyes, "Ow! My eyes!" 

As they laughed, you edged away smiling. It was always good to see everyone in high spirits, you thought as you joined the edges again, watching everyone else mill around, mindlessly chatting in peers or in groups. The people blurred, and the image went completely. 

Heart racing, a voice collided with your ears, muffling out the real. "-While the castle was trying to kill us!" Lance's voice snapped. 

You fall back into the wall, feeling it's cool surface against your skin. That was real. You existence was real. Closing your eyes, the sounds of reality drifted back and you opened them again. The natives moved around as though nothing happened. 

Pidge paused in front of you, "You alright, Y/N?" Pidge slung the bag she carried over her-  _his_ shoulder. You watched vaguely as Allura approached both you and Pidge, eyes narrowed. 

You blinked rapidly, "Ye- yeah," you managed, straightened, "I'm fine. How are you?" 

Allura cleared her throat loudly, halting before you, moving closer towards the shorter member of the two. "So Pidge," she started cautiously, before Pidge could actually answer your question, slightly grey-faced. "we haven't had a chance to really...talk." she tried, hesitantly, "Tell me about yourself."

You found yourself frowning for Pidge as he stared blankly at the princess, "Hmmm," he managed through a tight throat, before clearing it, "Well, I like peanut butter, and I like peanut cookies, but I  _hate_ peanuts. They're so dry. Also I sweat a lot. I-I mean, in general, unrelated to the peanuts." He rambled, bashfully.

"Ahhhh..." you tried, for Allura, who looked equally as lost as you were. Pidge shrugged, attempting to shoulder past the princess. Allura straightened, brow furrowing, "I-I suppose I was thinking of something a little more  _personal_?" 

And you were completely lost, what were each trying to do? 

And to add to the confusion the princess winked.  _What?!_

"Wait, Pidge," You managed, "do you like someone?"

Pidge's body went rigid, eyes widening, "What?" He voice pitched in a high pitched tone to show her obvious discomfort. 

 _Same,_ you thought bitterly. Allura gave a frustrated noise out of her throat, trying to start back on the conversation to wanted from the start. "We have  _a lot_ in common." 

Blinking the shorter member's face remained blank, lips tugging downwards in an unimpressed manner, "Like what?" 

Allura's eyes widened as she struggled to come up with an answer, "Oh well... Both of us had our father's taken away by Zarkon." 

"Yeah, but I'm going to get mine back," Pidge retorted, shocking both you, Allura and her- _him_ self. Allura lips thinned, shoulders slumping forward, as Pidge rushed to apologise, "Augh... Sorry. I-I really didn't mean to-" 

Allura managed to look up again, eyes pained, "No, I understand. I just want you to know that you can confide in me. If there's  _anything_ you  _ever_ want to talk about..."

You watched as the silence drew out, Allura's finger's lacing together as she leant forward, "... _Anything._ " 

"Huh?" Pidge gushed out, eyebrow raising, "...Okay," his eyebrow lowered, "I do have something to tell you." 

Allura's face lit up, a smile creeping onto her face, "I had a feeling~!" She sung, "What is it?" 

Pidge bowed his head, "I'm leaving Team Voltron." He mumbled down to the ground - maybe hoping to drown his words out. 

"Wait, what?" You chorsed with the princess, jaw slacking, unable to bring words to your lips. 

Pidge shrugged. adjusting his glasses on his nose, "I decrypted the information from the Galra ship about where my family might be, or at least where they were. I've made up my mind. I'm leaving tonight." 

Allura was the first to be able to find words, "Pidge, you can't. You're one of five Paladins. You have a sacred trust to defend the universe." 

"Who'd pilot the Green Lion, Pidge?" You asked reasonably.

Pidge ignored your, eyes focusing on the princess instead, "My first priority is to find my family! I thought you of all people would understand. If you had a chance to get your father back, wouldn't you?" He snapped, fingers hooking around the straps of his bag. He, then turned to you, eyes blazing, "You or Allura or even Coran can, I can't. Family's priority... I'm sorry. I should go tell everyone else." Finally brushing pasted the flustered woman of royalty, Pidge walked away, not looking back as Rover trailed behind the intelligent individual. 

"I-I," you stammered, "Was that what you were looking for?" You asked awkwardly.

Allura's face dropped, "No. Obviously." She mumbled, not unkindly.


	17. Chapter Seventeen - Explosive's Power

Shiro's eyebrow's drew together, "Pidge, no...!" He managed, protesting as sounding as he could muster towards the young member of the group, unwilling to come across as demanding. 

Pidge shoulder's slumped forward, eyes scanning the floors surface, "The Download from the Galra ship was enough to at least get me in the right direction to start my search. I have a pod all ready to go." He explained ruefully, eyes to meeting the Leader of Paladin's eyes. 

Keith's lips thinned, as he regarded the shorter boy, "You can't leave!" He objected, not having the control Shiro demonstrated beforehand.

Pidge forced himself to look up, eyes briefly scanning yours - maybe to find a hint of encourage for the one person that wasn't internally linker to Voltron. All you could manage was a sharp crease of your brow. Pidge looked away, eyes narrowing to Keith, "You can't tell me what to do!" He snapped, 

Keith's brow deepened, "If you leave, we can't form Voltron. And that means we can't defend the universe against Zarkon. You're not the only one with a family. All these Arusians have families. Everyone in the universe has families." He contiuned, eyes widening to challenge. 

You cleared your throat, catching everyone's attention, "Keith's right: but it's Pidge's decision. No one can force an individual into something that they don't want to participate in. Once I forced half of my friends to play soccer with me. We didn't win one game." It was a weak attempt to lighten the mood, but an attempt nonetheless, you thought as you watch Hunk pout. 

"So you're saying if a person is unwilling to play, you all lose?" He asked, pout still remaining. 

Opening you're mouth to protest at his choice of words, you struggled to reply, "No! I mean-"

Hunk pushed your attempt aside, "I have a family. They live on Earth. I want to be with them. Is that- is that, like, a thing that can happen?" He asked, as you gave up entirely. 

Allura's eyebrows rose, disbelief etched on her facials as she studied the warmhearted boy, "You want to leave too?"

Hunk shrugged, Of course I do," he replied, "Look, Voltron is super-cool, don't get me wrong, but I never signed up for a lifetime in space fighting aliens." He tried to correct, watching the princess fight with mixed emotions. Most of them entirely negative. 

Keith's nostrils flared as he stepped aggressively towards the shorter boy, eyes narrowing, "You're putting the live of two people over the lives of everyone else in the entire galaxy-!" Keith started, voice cracking like a whip, as his body grew rigid. Eye fiery as he considered Pidge. Shiro caught the young man's arm, face stony. 

"Keith!" He snapped, drawing the boy back a couple of steps, "That's not how a team works. As Y/N has just tried to say: People have to want to be a part of it. They can't be forced." He warned, voice low as Keith silently relented, eyes casting down to the ground. 

Shiro finally let his arm go, turning to Pidge, eyes soft again, "If you want to leave, we won't try to stop you. But, please, just think about what you're doing." He pleaded reasonably, lips turning slightly downwards. 

Sighing, Pidge's eyebrow quaked, as he visibly fought with himself, only to come to the same conclusion, "I'm sorry. You're going to have to find someone else to pilot the Green Lion." He managed apologetically, tugging on his bag strap as he left the group, without looking back. You were almost reminded of your time departing to the Garrsion to teach - thankfully almost. 

Shoving the haunting thought aside, frightened that it could interfere with this conversation, you watched him go.

Allura sighed heavily, "I can't believe it," she grasped, "This team is falling apart. How will we ever form Voltron?" Her voice quivered, but seemingly gathering herself up, she turned away from the departing Pidge, glazing at the entrance further in the castle. 

You found yourself watching Shiro, unable to look anywhere else. He seemed conflicted, eyebrows drawn together and lips etched into a thin line, as he watched what you couldn't. There was to much within the gestures, that caught you into a startled faze. One of defeat, but strength and certainty. Another of worry, confusion and draining hope. 

Pidge and Allura.

You sighed away the thoughts, shoving them into your corners of your mind, before you looked away from the attractive male. The lights drowned out any darkness now, you realized, with a sense of warmth. Everyone choose their path - they took it where they wished for it to go. 

Pidge, you believed, who be a safe as anyone on their on paths. Maybe even more safer than you could give her credit for. 

Him. Right. 

The lights flickered, a groaning rocking against the floor, in waves. The lights flickered before shutting off completely. The castle stood in darkness. You grasped, immediately reaching for the nearest wall. 

"What was that?" Hunk cried out, feeling his way to to walls as well, hand brushing your cheek. You opened your mouth to announce your presence, before his knee knocked the wind from you, as he tripped. You grasped, toppling over. "I'm here!" You managed weakly, through uneven pants. 

"Ow!" he yelped, shying away from you to give you room, "Sorry Y/N!" 

Keith followed example, yelling in protest as the friendly giant stood on his foot, "Watch it!" 

"Sorry, sorry, Keith." Hunk managed meekly, allowing you to assume that he was gesturing for the boy to calm down. 

"It must be at the Bridge!" Allura called, through the darkness. 

Shiro felt his way towards you, hand finding yours. You fought not to react to his touch, with blushing cheeks. You were glad that it was dark. "Alright, our eyes will adjust soon to the dim lighting, so just feel your way towards the Bridge, I'm assuming the Arusians would have already fleed to their village." 

Everyone, not bothering to reply, nor think of the sensible solution, took off at a jog. Allura leading this time, her footsteps echoing across the hallway. 

Running in low light wasn't the brightest idea, anyone had. 

The Bridge fall into view, debris littering the entrance, as though the room hinted at collapsing, the room drifted with smoke and an electrical taste that immediately you recognized. Fighting blindly at the tears of panic, you pulled away from Shiro's grasp, "No!" You cried, fretting his hands away, bombs whistling overhead. 

You fought yourself against oblivion, you fright bring you into a sense of faintness. "Bombs up ahead, Sister. Careful." Your brother warned. 

Pushing yourself further into the corridors, you felt your knees buckle and yourself crash into the flooring. Knees barking with pain, you grasped loudly, wrapping your hands around yourself. The shadows seemed the lengthen, and give in entirely. 

Swallowing... swallowing... swallowing. 

You cowered, drawing yourself into the nearest corner, ears ringing of remembrance. You sobbed, the taste of metallic burning your throat, drawing you further into the moment that changed you forever. "No..." you managed, as your body seized up, coiling within itself as though you could cower further. 

Hands grasped roughly at your forearms, drawing you to your feet, but you weren't apart of it, as you stared dimly into his eyes. The eyes that was lineage of your family. "To you too brother." 

"Y/N!" He called - you weren't even aware that he had called your name before his departure. Or was that someone else?

"Y/N, come on now." He cooed, his breath warm against your face. It was someone else, but all you could was see was the sand reaching up into the sky as the bombs dropped, smoke drifting against the corpses. The sand rough against your palm as you struggled forward. You felt like your were being drag, your skin raw against the coarse surface.

The hottest of your cheek. The sting... you blinked furiously, your muscles relaxing again. You cheek ached from a blow, as you recollected your thoughts. You only had the willpower to stop yourself from weeping and realize that you had been dragged just to outside the Bridge. 

Coran was there this time, but you expected that the blow wasn't from him. You frowned, eyes edging away from the kind man's face and onto Keith's. And then onto Shiro's. 

Both had their left hand fingers loosely around their right wrist, making it harder for you to distinguish which one slapped you. Their posture as rigid as the other, but their facials completely different. 

You blinked again, "I-I..." you struggled, looking back to Coran, "I'm sorry." 

Coran sighed heavily, falling onto the balls of his feet, "This is an interesting day," he commented lamely, "How's Lance?" He suddenly asked Shiro, 

Shiro's face turned stony, "Not looking good, without the Crystal, the Castle is without power-"

Hurried footsteps cut off the conversation, "Lion warriors, our village is under attack! We need help!" He panicked, voice high and shrill. You did anything not to wince. 

Keith moved forward, muscles still tense, "Let's get to the Lions!" He announced, eyes blazing in determination. 

Allura's voice drifted from the Bridge, voice tried and worn, "You can't. They're sealed in their hangars. There's no way to get them out."

You shakily got to your feet, gingerly gathering your shirt to your nose, "How 'bout you-?" You started, only to be interrupted by the distressed royal figure of the land, "Will you not help us?"

Keith sighed, breath hissing against his throat, "We'll help you. We just-" he attempted, only to be cut off by Lance groaning. He let out an annoyed sigh again, as his brow furrowed, eyes going to the injured member of the group. You blinked and followed his glaze. 

Lance lay, pale on to ground, carefully drawn away from any debris, or objects. You staggered forward, ignoring the pointed glance Shiro gave you. Through teary eyes, you moved forward, not paying attention to the surroundings that threatened to close in on you. Hunk watched you warily, as you approached the injured boy, the end of your shirt pinched to your nose. "This is bad." He mumbled weakly, 

Coran nodded, standing, "We have to get a new Crystal to get the Castle working again. But, to get a new Crystal, we need a ship." 

Pidge, whom you weren't aware of, spoke for the first time, "The pod I was loading, we can use that! I left the bay door open." 

Coran's face relaxed, eyes bright, congratulating the youngster, "I can use the scanner in the pod to see if there's a Balmera nearby. Hunk, you come with me. I'll need someone big to help me carry the Crystal."

Everyone paused, "A Balmera?" He repeated, hopelessly, as you knelt beside Lance, hesitantly. 

Coren nodded, rapidly, "It's where the Crystals come from. I'll tell you about it on the way!" Tugging at Hunk's sleeve, Pidge lead, both Hunk and Coran to the flight pod, allowing silence to take over the remainder of the group. 

You didn't dare say anything, nor breath outside the fabric, that start to warm with your breath. Keith spoke, voice cool and low, "I'll go see what's happening at the Arusian village." He announced, edging away. 

"I'll go with you, Keith. I brought this on the poor Arusians." Allura offered, her voice waned and rueful. You felt as bad as she did, you realized, but not entirely for the same reasons. 

Keith nodded, allowing the princess to join him, Shiro stepped into the doorway, "I'll tend to Lance, with Y/N. We'll stand watch over the Castle." 

A very small voice crept forward, pressing into your mind. Fools. 

Thankfully you had the strength to keep the voice to yourself, through a new wave of salty tears."Yeah," you interjected hoarsely, voice muffled through the fabric. Shiro finally looked back to you, brow furrowed at you. You frowned back.


	18. Chapter Eighteen - Mist's Wind

You didn't bother to speak, instead you bowed your head, gingerly checking his purse. It was weaker than that of a normal human being, you knew and much to your concern. You were taught the basic first aid coarse, leading to mouth to mouth, pulse rates, stitching, gluing and the information on wounds - internal and external. 

As your Commanders drilled into you years ago: Injuries are common, learn what is fatal - and what can be cured. It will save you.

You understood straight away that by saved the meant: It helps you decide whether you - or them - were worth the wait. Sometimes you wished that you hadn't understood it at all. 

Lance, you knew, whether he was 'worth the wait', you would wait anyway. On the field, they asked of loyalty but also sense. Here they seemed to ask for just loyalty. 

Shiro knelt down beside Lance, eyes looking him over, before directing to you, "You walk ahead, we're going to the Castle's entrance. I'm carry him." 

Opening your mouth to protest, you paused. He was right, but that didn't stop you from feeling useless... and embarrassed. Managing a cult nod, you stood, shirt still pinched to your nose, "Alright then," you replied, turning on your heel, and stalking out. You weren't just going to wait, after all that'll make you feel worse. 

Stepping out of the room, you allow the shirt to fall back down, eyes stinging for the radiation that now lingered into the corridor. But you forced yourself to breath, deep and slow, mind channeling to a different room and place.  _Think of happier memories,_ you willed, fists clutching at your side. 

"Y/N," Shiro called, drawing your attention to him as he walked out, Lance slung over his shoulder. He offered you a small smile, but all you could see was that frown. "Are you alright?" He asked, drawing up next to you, as you began to stalk down the corridor. 

You sighed heavily, "Yeah, I'm fine, but..." You trailed off, eyes casting down to the floor, avoiding the look in his eyes. 

In the corner of your eye, you saw him nod, "You have felt better." he finished for you.

You nodded meekly, "Haven't we all been?" You asked, finally looking at him, attempting at a smile. 

"Maybe," he whispered, "I doubt  _all_ have been happy before." He continued, in softer tones, "those that don't remember it - or refuse to acknowledge it." 

You looked at him sharply, but found nothing that was conflicted nor directed. It was simply stated. "Right," you agreed. Then did Shiro sigh, looking at you with narrow eyes. An eyebrow rose up, "Y/N-" he started, as Lance groaned. An ache settled in to bottom of your heart. You winced. 

"Hang on, buddy. Help is on the way." He encouraged, voice firm and encouraging, you almost found yourself blinking at his change of tone. Instead, you fought the urges of agony that seized your heart, through clenched teeth.  _Fools._

Shiro scoffed, eyes weighing heavily back to you, "Y/N... look, I-" again he faltered, eyebrows drawing together, as the air escaped your lungs. You doubled over again, "Y/N, are you okay?" He asked, voice growing higher. 

"Can't- can't," you groaned, as you attempted to straighten, "breath..." you gashed out, as Shiro lead you to the nearest wall, allowing you to sinking to the floor. 

Your hands were shaking, you thought absentmindedly, thoughts drifting against the biting of the cold.  _Fools always died first._ Shiro was saying your name, somewhere. In this reality you didn't know. 

"Shiro..." you pleaded, reaching for his face, as he knelt down beside you, your finger traced his jawline, "am, am I a fool?" You managed, through an coarse breath through your aching chest. You vision blurred, as you watched his face draw nearer. 

_You choose the wrong path, Y/N. The wrong path._

You were blind, being dragged through the mist by a hand. Another reality, something told you. The mist was thick, not even dark shapes were allowed to pass through - nor light. It was like a black hole, but you knew you would be crushed into oblivion. 

"Sendak!" Shiro's voice snapped, his presence in front of you drawing away through the mist. The hand left yours, reluctantly drifting away from your touch. 

"Let them fight, Y/N," a voice crowed out, the mist seemingly getting thicker. The voice echoed as through you were placed with a box - or placed in a box of reality. Either one it was confusing. 

You squinted, brushing your hands through the mist. No moist fall against you skin. "Where am I?" You called, your own voice echoing into the cloud. 

"She like all people die with reason," Sendak's voice hammered through the plain, hovering above your reality. "She choose. Now stand aside." He sneered, his face flashing against your eyelids. 

You cussed, drawing away from the mist into the circle it provided, "Where am I?" You called again, this time your voice breaking. 

"No! You're not getting in." Shiro responded, his voice seeming to be miles away. 

"You are here, and they are in reality," A voice responded, hoarsely. Much to the point, you realized, _the_  voice. You staggered backwards, the mist bring you to a halt on your feet. Adjusting your step, you bite back the scream for help. After all you knew that screaming didn't help cases. Even if it helped release your obvious fear.

"And where is here?" You hissed, unable to pinpoint the direction of her voice, the scream dying in your throat.

"An part within the realities, you could say, a dimension that only the soul of a being can enter." She described, just beyond the mist, the coiled around. You felt yourself panic. "You have changed, my descendant," the voice snarled hotly for frustration. 

"Yes, I am." Sendak's voice hummed out, his a low growl. You turned sharply, trying to search for the source. 

"Don't be bothered by the voices that reach down here, Y/N," the female cooed, almost mother-like, "your concern is that of yourself and of me." 

You felt the stinging of your eyes, as your back straightened, finally pinpointing the direction of the familiar sound, "And why do I have to be concerned by you?" You snapped, unable to help yourself, as the tears blurred your vision - again. 

"My, my, how weak you have become." She drooled out, stepping just outside the circle, enabling you to see a lingering of a shadow. 

Your hands clenched together, as you stared reluctantly at the figure, "I have never been strong, you must have me confused with someone else." You bit back, cheeks burning with shame. 

A dry cackle followed, "I see right through you, Y/N. I know what you were and weren't, there is no confusion here." 

"Who are you?" You hoarsely asked, hands releasing from their ball, you nerves settling in the pit of your stomach.

"I am somewhat a guardian to you, as much as I am to another." She replied, finally stepping out of the mist, into the small circle, her golden eyes weighing you. 

The woman was striking. Silvery hair fall behind her back and was gathered into a braid, small wisps fall onto her face. Thin lips that curved into a small smile, that brightened her caramel skin tone. Maybe she had to much of a sharp face, you thought, as she in return regarded you - too sharp, resulting in her looking cruel. 

"You will call me by a different name in reality, Y/N, here I am the only individual that exists - aside from yourself - therefore there is no name required for me here." 

"Then the same must go onto me," you managed, trying to find something within yourself to fight against the mist.

The woman's smile grew, "Ah, there you are," she whispered, teeth flashing as though she was baring fangs at you. 

You gulped, "Are- are you the reason I'm having these images?" You asked timidly, 

Her eyes narrowed, lips pulsing, "Some, yes. But your condition - your people call it:  _Post Traumatic Stress Disorder_  - is nothing of my doing, you acquired that by yourself, a pity really," she paused, eyes distant. She shook her head to rid herself of whatever her thoughts lead her. 

"Why?" You grasped out, "Why everything?" You whimpered, your knees feeling weak again. 

Her smile returned, something warm behind it, "Someone has to play one step ahead, do they not?" She purred, her smile turning into something like a smirk. She shrugged, before you could reply, "Yes, one does, or else it gets uninteresting; and why would someone what to do something if it's not interesting?" 

Another question, another silence as the woman answered, "Nobody, therefore you have nothing. You are, what I consider, a 'step ahead'." And then she was gone, fragments drifting into the mist, as she stepped away - the winds intensifying, whipping around you, tugging at your hair and clothing. You watched her disappear through half-closed eyes. 

Then you awoke. 

"Voltron is ours." A voice purred, completely drawing away the images that floated in your mind. You groaned, your previous pain, exiting out your mouth, alerting the Garla of your conscience presence. The two Garla paused, staring cautiously at your form, as you rose from the depths. 

One barked a laugh as he approached you, "Now, isn't this the Earthling?" He sneered, dawning on the must disturbing facts of the day - and that was saying a lot. 

_You had seen them before._

The other approached with feline grace, a smirk tugging on his lips, "Much help you were to them," he mocked, "now you'd know what my fist feels like," he sneered, fist rising up, and instead of aiming for your rib cage like he had before, he struck you in the face. Hard.

Your head collided with the wall, your teeth sinking into your tongue, as pain shot your the back of you head. You groaned, blood already filling up your mouth. The other laughed, watching as he delivered the other blow. 

You saw red, the pain blinding you, as you head made contact with the wall again. But still you remained aware. The lead Garla, knelt down beside you, cradling your hair, "Do you regret your decision, Earthling?" 

Strangely the mockery almost sounded as a title, but through this blurry haze, you couldn't decipher what from what. Pain shook from your head, as he pulled roughly on your tangled hair, "That promise didn't come much in handy to you, did it?" He cooed, finger traced the edges of your face, down to your chin. 

He gingerly wiped the blood from it. 

"Or did you give up on it?" He jibed, nails digging into your skin. It took your moments until you realized what was being said. He stood, allowing you to fall onto the ground. "I think it was the latter." He sneered, driving a kick to your rib cage. 

And then you understood another thing, he was going easy on you. His blows were only meant to draw out pain, not to bring you under. Why? You had no idea.

You coughed, managing to draw yourself away, blood spattering against the cool ground. You looked up, eyes flashing against the light of the entrance. But your tongue was too sworn to reply. He chuckled again, before driving a finishing touch to home, just below your chin.


	19. Chapter Nineteen - Cold's Whisper

You knew you were floating in the mist again, this time you were utterly alone, unable to call on anyone, or thing. You were completely alone in the mist that no longer curled around you like a cage, but allowed the timid movement of your feet as you drew further and further into the plain, the mist not multiplying nor thinning. The ground remained a mist, though you expected that the plain was completely drawn out of colour and exist.

Something inside you told you that nothing but three things lived here.

The light, the mist and yourself.

It was comforting in a way, after all that meant that light had to be projected from somewhere – a sun or a reflection of a planet. That meant that your surrounded by nothing. You were here in an area that remain considerable to the physics back within reality.

Either that, or the light was generated off nothing, you pushed the thought aside. No, this is something like an ultra reality to the one my physical body is held in.

And if that was true, the reality had to be close, making the similarities strikingly similar to each other. You could hear the voices of that of the Reality and that must mean that you're plains were joined in a way.

Maybe a hundred – no!- billions of light years away, or uncountable to the human mind or it's computers. But it's exist were so close together in the quantum physics of things, that it was consider neighbours to each other.

And if that was true, then that meant that you could never walk the distance out. You would be dead on a day of light-years. So you stayed, amongst the mist, it's moisture did not linger on your skin, or kiss against your skin. It was as though the mist barely ceased to exist.

Being alone was almost peaceful now, the voices of the reality not touching the barrier between and not penetrating the white exists that heard you. The thought troubled you greatly and all you could do was watch the never ending sky, through the layers of cloud, hoping that you'd be able to return shortly.

“Only I can release you from this pocket of reality.” A voice called, the woman suddenly drawing from the mist, footsteps inaudible against the floor.

You blinked furiously, “You control me?”

She smiled, something like ice of a summer's face, “I have complete control about your existence here.” She replied, smile only growing broader.

You should've felt angry – but you couldn't. “You have control over me here – complete and utter.” You repeated, turning the information slowly in your mind. Here.

“This is where you are to recover, my Earthling, build your strength to lead the way and stay one step ahead. Build the strength of two men.” She cooed, hand reaching out and petting your hair, her touch like fire to your skin. Burning further into your mind, your skull and your eyes. You hated it. On that hatred you remained, against the mist as she melted, face peeling away – skull – eyes. You hated her as her laughter rung out in the emptiness of your existence. “You melt under my pressure,” She managed through the roaring of the mist, that began their mad decent upwards, “You will learn to burn and restore.” I will teach you, Earthling.

Her hand reached forward, fleshless fingers brushing against your cheek, “You will change us, and I will change you and that decision of yours.”

You were frozen with fear, feeling the sleekness of bone, the sharpness of nail. I am a fool.

-

You did, head pounding and nose aching. It only took a moment to realize that it was broken. Your wrists were bond and your cheek pressed against the flooring of the Bridge. Your surroundings remained fuzzy, blurring in your vision. You daren't groan, remaining relaxed against the floor, breathing catching in your throat, before you finally controlled it.

Rise.... and fall. Rise.... and fall.

You rib cage hurt to expand, your tongue still thick in your mouth. You had been hurt, you face swollen and limbs heavy from the lack of oxygen. But everything is mobile. Strength of two men...

Maybe not an eye, you reflected numbly, unable to twitch it without pain. “Ahhh,” A voice purred, and yourself yourself tense, “the Earthling is awake.”

Why the special attention? You allowed yourself to push yourself onto you back, your left eyes completely swelled over, shorting your overall vision. He approached your again, with the grace of an animal – and killer, you put in, watching him approach through one eye.

“I don't usually toy with my enemies, Earthling, I kill where I need to kill. I kill to kill. Never toy with a potential threats,” he drooled out, pointing out rather slyly that you were no threat to his cause.

Or were you? Some part of you ask.

You had nothing to say though – nor could you without sounding like you hadn't spoken in years. Maybe it was for the best. “We are going to take down the Paladins of Voltron,” he continued, yellow eyes angling towards you, “kill them quickly as they deserve to be killed. This small Paladin will be the first to drop off, then the blue one and then the Champion. We'll send other's two hunt down the other two. And you will bear witness, that's all you do.”

He was speaking in present now, you realized, unable to recognise why.

“You watch on and do nothing, because you don't understand what game you're are in.”

You reguarded him coolly, “Ih no wha gathme I'm playin,” you coaxed out, “a dangrothos one.” Strength of two men.

He chuckled, deep and deadly, “Yes, a dangerous one. A one that'll cost everything you've ever known.”

Something was nudging in your mind - something you should know. The thought was disturbing. “Everythith?” You managed, eyes heavy-lidded. Everything.

A slow smirk crawled onto his features, mouth opening to reply as he leaned forward to whisper the answer – but you already knew. Moving quickly, you kicked out, your legs contacting his knee caps. He grasped at the blow, frozen indecision.

Indecision had cost you, so it had to cost him.

Throwing yourself to your feet, you had him in your vision, your vision burning red, as you kicked him again, neck this time, as he fought against the blows with deep groans and breathy grasps. He was falling from them, and you were climbing. Something you couldn't do before. Driving your knee into his face, you knee gave a bark of pain, colliding with his tendons and muscles that ran to protect his windpipe, esophagus and spine. You drew back sharply, staggering at the movement before readjusting your footing and leaping lightly over to Shiro barely aware of the other Galra reaching out and... you were out of reach, standing over Shiro, who appeared unconscious.

You doubted he's be anywhere but the plain you walked.

You looked over, eyes widening and heart hammering against your aching ribcage as the Galra stood, hand reaching out and tenderly touching his neck. Yellow eyes burning with an uncounted rage.

“Dangerth?” You repeated, an unknown fury climbing up with your mytious strength. “Yeth, I ughree. But I chooth thith path.” You continued, “Yow do too. The dethsion ith ours.” Your lips slipt as you smile, probably looking as though you had be driven mad. “You run or you stay. Takth or not.”

Sendak's brow furrowed in fury, his fangs bared out, flashing against the purple lighting. “You will regret your decision, Earthling,” he vowed, and you had no doubt, “I know what haunts you - those who are you enemies, your friends, they know what makes you tick, what makes you break, Earthling. I do. And you do. Pray I will be arrogant to the final words that drain your dignity.”

I have none, you thought, eyes drifting sadly over to two Galra, realizing the effects of his words run up your spine. But that won't stop him, an after thought reminded you, as the two approached slowly, attention drawn to you.

“I know,” You coaxed out, almost satisfied that it came out clear. He ran at you, fast and hard, that you knew you wouldn't be able to react quickly enough to attack yourself. You were on the defense.

Dogging the blow, you shied away feeling the a strange sensation creep into your legs, as though you were dancing. Ducking from another, you stumbled into the centre of the room, patting heavily. He came at you, striking to hard and fast. Shiro's eyes fluttered open, adjusting onto you, as you caught the blow below the ribs.

Grunting you danced away, feet beginning to tire and arms aching from their restraints. But he was at it again, before you could recollect yourself, delivering another blow, you stumbled weakly, falling hard onto your knees. Breathing hard. He stood over you, eyes glistening with amusement, “Now, Champion,” he drooled out, drawing his attentive glaze to the man.

You cried out, attempting to step forward. His fist collided with your face, sharp pains sparking. You were blind momentarily, falling hard onto you back, wrist groaning from the impact. “Shut up.” He sneered, kneeling beside you, pulling your hair back roughly, “Shut up.” He repeated, before drawing to his feet, standing to face to Black Paladin.

Shiro blinked furiously unable to respond correctly. Eyes dilating, at each blink, and breathing shallow, you knew he was unresponsive to even himself. Desperately trying to clear his weaving vision, his eyes directed themselves to Sendak's direction, but he didn't answer.

Sendak sneered, a chuckle escaping his mouth, “Haxus, report in.” He commanded, stopping short of the disorientated Black Paladin.

A reply came, glitching slightly, “Haxus is gone, and you're next.” Pidge warned, through the communicator.

Sendak's eyes flickered with rage again, and you feared Shiro would be at the other end, “You've slowed me down, but this ship is mine! You will turn yourself over to me immediately.” He commanded, voice cold and hard.

You desperately needed to get to your feet, you knew, head dizzy and body heavy as though your previous strength was draining away. You had to...Strength of two men.

“Never!” Pidge cried, voice high and shrill.

Sendak's mouth twitched, a smirk peeling onto his features, “Well then,” he cooed, “maybe your leader can convince you.”

Shiro's eyes finally focused, his body turning sharply in the Galra's direction, as he drew near, “What do you want?”

“Your friend wanted to hear from you,” Sendak drooling, closing in on him, anger directed at the person who sheltered you.

Shiro's eyes widened, “Pidge? Pidge, don't listen to-” he started, before Sendak's arms wrapped around the back of his throat, cutting him off as he scream, body seizing up at the pain.

“N-no!” You cried out, the energy of the scream tearing you onto your side, tears blurring your vision. Pidge's voice was barely audible against your cusses, as Sendak replied to the younger member through the communicator, “You can make it stop. Turn yourself in. His suffering is in your hands.” The worst thing was that he sounded reasonable.

Sendak's delivered a hard blow to Shiro, cuffing him around the neck, the electric running up his spine. Shiro jerked violently against the pain. You understood something then, no matter how much you had pissed off him, he hadn't allowed himself to pull out his worst weapon yet against you – maybe the Galra thought that you couldn't survive it's intense pain - he was probably right. Maybe he refused to, or waited on it, waiting until you were pleading for a fast ending.

Maybe he just wanted to save this sort of pain for Shiro, his target from the beginning within the Paladins.

“I'm impressed that you managed to escape,” Sendak's voice broke the silence of your thoughts, his voice almost like an whisper, eyes looking over Shiro, “Perhaps it would be worth the trip to your planet to see if the rest of your kind have your spirit. Of course, they will end up broken, just like you. Now that we have Voltron, every planet, every race, all share the same fate.”

“And what fath is that?” You crowed out, attempting to draw his attention away from him.

Sendak's shoulder's tensed, “You're still going to speak after all that has happened?” He snarled, eyes still on Shiro.

“Yeth,” you replied, “I- I hathe strength oth twoth men.” You replied. Riiigth. He didn't bother even reply as he stepped away from the worn leader, eyes sharp on the computer, Pidge was standing there, hands typing against the screen.

Sendak's back tensed, and with the speed and grace he had attacked you at, he charged as Pidge paused, as though frozen before running off, drawing away from the Bridge.

Another Pidge ran in, panting, her- his feet drawing him towards Shiro, “Shiro, wake up,” he breathed, Sendak was running over you, arm extended at Pidge. “It's me, Pidge-” he started, before Sendak's gauntlet caught the small individual, his laughter cutting through the chaos, “You really thought your little hologram trick would really work with me?” He purred, as footsteps drew closer to the Bridge.

Strength of two men. Keith and Allura entered, faces pitched in a shade of absoulte bitterness. Keith Bayard flashes, as he stepped forward, responding to his summon.

Sendak's lips peel back into a dangerous snarl, “Stand back!” As Lance shifted position, eyes half-lidded, and lips turning into an victorious grin. Raising his arm quickly, his Bayarrd responded, flashing before he took aim. The blast knocked Sendak forward, rocking him on his feet. Standing sharply onto his feet, Shiro rushed at Sendak, arm glowing and teeth bared. Strength... of two men.

You were on your feet as Keith replaced Shiro's attack, Pidge following behind. Screaming a battle cry, the Galra face the two individuals, body leaning forward to ready his position within the fight. Throwing all his body strength into it, Keith attack, sword cracking against Sendak's arm. Sendak simply brushed him past. Keith parried away, face pitched in an unreadable mask.

A sickly crack sounded, green danced across the room, in a electric disagreement. An chain coiled around his arm, holding him firm, before he could go on the attack. Pidge stood metres away, breathing heavily. Pulling hard, the electrical green chain severing the arm, another fit of electrical strict danced across the room, flashing in different colours.

“Keith now!” A voice cut through the plain field, drawing attention to the Princess. Keith kicked out, bracing himself against the aftershock. The Galra staggered, broken and disorientated as the barrier rose up to encage the monster. You were the only one to laugh at the victory, the blood in your mouth making it sound as though you were chocking.

But you couldn't find anything in yourself to stop yourself.


	20. Chapter Twenty - Warmth's Embrace

You were taken immediately to a healing pod, struggling against the hands that held you. The mist would call you, you knew, and didn't wish to enter the realm. Not when your mind was already carving the thought of:  _strength of two men._ It disturbed you to know that you  _had_  felt stronger, maybe only by a fragment, but it was enough for you to get up and running.

“Guys,” You tried, “I have rested enough.” You stated firmly, as they set Lance into a pod, clothes stripped and replaced into a tight uniform. You sighed, as Princess Allura weighed with you a tired glance, “Look, at least

you're not Lance, he'll have to be in their longer.” She managed through a drained tone, eyes looking over your face.

You could only imagine what you looked like, and all of them as ugly as the last. You were lucky that everyone had the dignity to hold eye contact with you. “Yes, I am. But then I'd feel better if I remained with this markings on my face.” You tongue had gone down, allowing your speech to come out clearly – you were grated that at least. Maybe if you hadn't, then you wouldn't have minded going in.

Shiro blinked, eyes struggling to remain wide open as he squinted at you through the glaring lights of the room, “Sometimes markings serve as a reminder worth your memory – being beaten by Sendak is not one of them.” He breathed out, eyes flickering with a burning fire.

“I'm not entirely sure on that” You replied, though not entirely giving up, “I mean...” you stopped short of your pod, gathering your uniform that was laid out for you, “It'll serve as a reminder what happens when you don't get up and fight.” You managed, your tone turning surprisingly icy. “I think I'm tired of the repeat and forget stage. This picture that now is my face, will drag me through those moments where I trembled at my knees – sobbing hysterically, cradling myself because _I wasn't strong enough to stand and fight_.” Your argument was shocking to whole crew, you noticed mildly, unsure on what to feel by their surprise, “But,” you concluded, “it also will serve as a proud banner for when I do come up and fight.” You crossed your arms, ignoring the glance of concern from the attractive male, and turning your attention to the Pod, the glass reflecting onto your face. You nose was broken and shifted to the left slightly, your eye had gone down, but black bruising had littered your skin, cuts lined up your chin, some deep others shallow. You lip was sworn and split – weeping, patches of your hair was ripped out, and disheveled.

Shakily you reached for your nose, hoping to push the thoughts that crossed your mind and with one quick motion you set your nose. The bone snapping back into place, you vision blurred with tears and knee buckled with the pain. Shiro rushed forward, gathering you in his arms before you crippled to the floor. “Oh god,” you whispered, voice hoarse. Shiro managed a chuckle, that sounded something like:  _told you so._ “You alright?” He whispered, words soft against you ear.

“Prefect, bruises heal and so does broken bones” You rasped out, feeling his body heat against yours. You were glad that your eyes were flooding with tears to hide the blush. You blinked furiously, finally finding your feet. You turned to him, tears still present within your eyes, “Is it set?” You hissed against the pain, eyes closing.

You waited for a reply, feeling his breath dusting across your face, as he leant in, pressing his fingers gingerly to the bridge of your nose, “Yes, bones heal – but sometimes not straight,” he murmured, causing your to groan, “It won't happen if you go into the Pod.” He continued, roughly, as you attempted to open your eyes, oy to force them closed again at the tears.

And the fact that he was so close that you could almost kiss him again – but who were you kidding? You weren't a little girl with a crush no more. You forced yourself into the safest position in this room that still involved with the man – and that was keeping your eyes closed.

You chuckled, before wincing at the pain, “Hmmmm,” you tried, “It does sound appealing, but you could always break it again if it does.”

“And then your go into the pod?” He asked horrified,

You nodded, “It wouldn't be a mark worth keeping would it?” You teased, surprised by even yourself. “Yes,” You adjusted, noticing the quietness of the room, “Yes.” You repeated, going cosmic red.

He sighed, stepping away from you and you allowed yourself to open your eyes, with a ginger twist of your face. “Fine.” He muttered, though you doubted he would break your nose in any circumstances. You grinned, causing your face to shift uncomfortably under all the bruises and cuts, “Thank you, I won't blame you if you can't look at me for a couple of days.” You thanked, directing your attention to the quite team members. They wouldn't ask you into Pod, you knew – well hoped in some cases – and would respect your decision like you did with theirs.

Shiro's eyes softened, lips parting as he thought of words to speak. But he didn't reply and with a soft smile he too turned back to the team members, “How long will Lance be held in that Pod for?” He asked, attention resting on the Princess.

Allura shrugged, “It is hard to say,” came her reply, “I think by tomorrow morning will do fine, let him rest through the night.”

 _Well... at least five hours..._ this encounter had taken up half the night away. Dawn was almost peaking through, and you were tempted to go out onto Bridge and watch it rise. It'll serve as a smoothing notion. But you  _are_ tired. But then again you had already been knocked out for a rest through that time. So that could wait. You nodded, “Okay, well I'm going to take a breather,” you stated, drawing yourself closer to the door. If you left alone – or didn't, that didn't bother you in the slightest. Your sudden urge to see the sun was all you needed in that particle time.

It obviously wouldn't be the same sun that shone across Earth's skies, but was it a star here? Or was it incomprehension through the dark void that you could no longer see it?

The scopes back on Earth could reach millions of light-years away, how long was here? They had no constellations that were recognizable – few or far – but then again it only took an different angle and you'd be seeing the stars from a different perspective.

No matter, you told yourself, flashing the companions an reassured smile, before slipping off. The corridors were the only thing following your very destination, as you neared you regretted the loneliness. It would be better with someone to block out the daunting errors within yourself, you thought bitterly, arms wrapping around yourself as you stepped onto the Bridge.

The white surface that expanded across to the other ridge, glowed from the moon, bright hues of white. You stepped onto it, squinting hard, you walked the length, your footsteps being the only thing against the surface. Pausing in the middle, you regarded the length of the flat lands below you, the wind tangling your already wild hair. Pushing the strands away from your face, eyes finally adjusting.

The flatland expanded out, small rolling hills clustered and formed further on it jagged ridges and cliffs. There was a beauty to land, something you hadn't cared to see before.

Maybe because you hadn't actually attempted to go beyond the Bridge, or below. Now in the cover of night, you stupidly felt safer than that of the day. Stupid, but you couldn't shake the feeling from your cooling limbs.

“Y/N.” Shiro's voice whispered, drifting into the wind to you. You looked at him, offering him another smile, aware of your obvious bruising and swelling on your face. He smiled, suddenly unsure, “I brought you ice.” He lifted up a bag of ice, “if you're not going to go into the Pod, ice will be the best for all your injuries.”

You laughed, glaring through the brightest of the bridge. “Thank you.” You thanked, absentmindedly touching your swollen face.

He finally approached, footsteps against the surface, “You're lucky you can talk.” He commented, his face's edges sharp against the light. But his lips were held in a soft line, that tilted downwards.

You cackled, “I couldn't an hour ago.” You replied, unable to draw you eyes away from his soft ones.

He nodded, indicating for you to sit and you obeyed, sitting with him on the edge. “I know,” he whispered, handing you the iced bag, “I heard it all,” he continued, voice still remaining as calm and soft. His eyes searched your face, with you felt inclined to ignore. Looking away, you heard his breathing settle in his chest and he prepared himself, “Y/N....” he started, before trailing off.

You didn't reply – you didn't know how to... even if you did, you were sure that you wouldn't be able to string words together.

“....I understand that you don't hold yourself a lot of credit...” he started, words knitting together effortlessly, though you couldn't help but feel the tension he couldn't rid himself, knotted in his shoulders, “....I understand that you believe that you would amount to anything no more. And I feel we've had this conversation so many times,” he huffed out, through he continued on, “What I saw,” his tone shifted completely as he regarded you again, voice strong and kind, “or  _heard –_  more correctly, was...was...  _strength_. I don't want you to bring out what happened previous to that event, because all of us know-”

“It wasn't just that-” you tired, “I collapsed on the Bridge, I lost breath for no reason-”

“You just had an panic attack, that's a reason enough Y/N.” He interrupted roughly, “You hadn't the time to recover.”

“I had plenty of time to recover.” You interjected sharply.

His shoulders slumped forward, arms resting heavy on his legs, “Not in your usual environment. Usually you can leave for soiltude afterwards, some quite. But then you were put into a position that only applied the stress your body was trying to rid itself of.”

“Huh,” was all you could say as you finally pressed the ice bag to your face with a flinch. “Right.” You grumbled out, as you directed all you attention to him again, contemplating whether of not to tell him of the plains you exist in, in you dreams.

You thought better of it.  _Strength of two men..._ the woman's voice rasped through your mind, undoubtedly from the plain. You felt lightheaded again, the world swelling and shifting before you eyes. You chest tightened, “Shiro,” You grasped, “It's... happening again...” You manged thought aching lungs.

_Strength of two men._

The ice bag fall through your fingers, rolling off you knees before Shiro caught it, placing it onto the Bridge behind you, his other arm already drawing you closer. “Y/N?” He asked, “What's happening again?” He called, drawing you back to him. You eyes focusing on his eyes.

“The woman...  _Shiro_... she's calling me.” And then you were slipping away from him, your should retching forward and driving into the plain.

You could still feel his fingers against you skin, among the mist.


	21. Chapter Twenty-one - Energy's Price

You awoke in bed, the devuts drawn up to your chin, the woman's voice barely an echo in your mind. The encounter was much to confusing, and your ability to comprehend it at the moment limited.  _Strength of two men..._

Shiro was sitting next to your bed, arms tucked under his head as he rested. She spoke of strength drawing... something that was hard to comprehend. Touching his hair, you fingers laced there through his soft locks. Your muscles relaxed at the texture and you settled back into your pillows.  _Strength of two men._

Shiro was immediately awake as your hand drew away, “Y/N?” He asked, voice heavy from sleep.

“Shiro,” you replied, voice rough from your sleep.

He breathed a sigh of relief, “You're okay.” He cooed soothingly. Though you weren't entirely sure who to. Him? Or you? Reaching forward, he thumb traced your cheek, which, you had noted, had gone down since you were awake. “Tell me,” he pleaded in soft but firm tones.

“Shiro-” you protested, suddenly nervous against the thought. You couldn't tell him, could you? The answer was difficult. You felt your eyelids droop.

“No,” he injected, voice growing steadily more concerned, you eyes focused and then unfocused, “ _please,_ someone needs to know. If not me, tell someone else.” He whispered, against you cheeks, lips pressing lightly onto the bridge of your cheekbone. “Someone needs to know, I'm sorry, I know I can't pressure you into this, and I will try to restrain myself. But....” he trailed off, drawing himself onto your bed, seating himself beside you.

You felt your eyes burned, “It only just started happening,” you whimpered, unsure on how to start. After all when was the start? She spoke of the visions you had been seeing, being apart of her influence, but would that be included?

Shiro nodded, arms drawing around you, “Since this afternoon?” He asked softly,

So it was still that day. Right.  _How long have I been out?_ You nodded, weakly, “Yes...”

“Who's this woman?” He asked gently, pressing his lips against your hair, his breath giving your goosebumps. He may be being gentle now, you reasoned, but that was because you were cooperating. There was nothing that allowed you to believe Shiro wasn't a violent human-being, but people had their limits, he'd get firm if he believed it was within his right to question in the safety of the other members.

He was a born leader after all.

You breathed deeply, your mind completely shutting off, “She meets me in the plains of my dreams, Shiro. She has complete control over me in that possible realm; here I am uncertain. But there I can walk for miles in the mist, or be trapped by it's winds. She is there, whether it's at the start or at's it's finish. She dismisses me, and calls me. She wants me strong again.”

You'd be foolish to believe that, you thought remembering what you had been through. After all she had called you 'a step ahead'. Nobody that used you was; and should not be considered as someone that benefits you, or makes you.

Never expect miracles with them. Even if they pretend to expect them from you.

“All of us do,” Shiro murmured, lips against you ear. You blushed against his touch, unsure on how to respond... “Oh!” The woman's voice crowed out, before laughter followed. You were awake again. You were sitting against the bedpost, eyes staring in Shiro. Shiro's brow creased, “Y/N, is it happening again?” His voice was low, and he was still in his seat, slightly raised.

You sobbed, “She's always been in my head, Shiro.” You cried out, tears stinging your eyes, “She's been in my head all this time.”

 _Learning everything about me._ There is no mistake here, she had said – and of course she was right. You were an open page to her. She commanded your mind like you did... and she just showed you she could do anything.

“Who, Y/N? Who?” He asked, kneeling beside the bed, brow furrowing.

“She walks the plains with me, Shiro. She goes by no name.” You actually felt nuts. You already had your own mind crying out through the images of the past. Why did someone else have to prod in there as well?

He breathed deeply, before standing and walking to the door without another word. The door slid open, revealing the whole team – aside from Lance, who must still be inside a Pod – just outside your room. “Princess, Coren no one else.” He murmured almost to low for you to hear.

The two Alteans stepped forward into the doorway, as Shiro stepped aside. The whole room's lights flickered on, momentarily blinding you. You blinked furiously, as Allura seated herself down in the chair, Coran reaching forward and placing a cool hand on your forehead. “Hot.” He mumbled, pulling it away, causing your brow to furrow.

You didn't feel hot, you realized dazed, not clumpy or uncomfortable in your body heat.

“Y/N, tell me what's happening?” Allura commanded, voice even and controlled.

You sighed, readily yourself. How exactly could you explain this? There was no advice on how to put words that would distress an individual – really – in these sort of situations. “A...” you trailed off, frown deepening, eyes sorting Shiro's. He stood at the bed, next to your head, seemingly towering over you. “.... someone's in my head.” You tried, the words growing bigger in your throat.

Coran was the first to break the silence that overcome the room, “In your head?” He repeated, though his tone suggested he had heard you correctly the first time. All you could do was nod gravely. Allura squeezed your hand, drawing your attention to her, “You need to be more specific,” she encouraged.

You knew you had to, but that's what you were afraid about. Telling them of an intruder in your mind was one thing – taking them into a plain was another thing altogether...

“I know,” you grunted out, shifting into a more comfortable position, “I- I just don't know how to say it.” You replied truthfully.

Shiro robotic hand rested on your head, “Just say it in anyway that first comes to mind,” he suggested in a low tone.

You sighed, forcing yourself to relax, as you prepared yourself. “She takes me to a different plain – another existence or dimension – there is only light, mist and us there – I- I am certain that nothing else creases to exist there. She meets me, whether at the end or at the start, and she speaks to me...”

“Speaks to you? And what does she say?” Allura asked, leaning in her seat, lips quirking downwards.

“The first time – near the Bridge, Shiro – she called me into to a plain and spoke to me of  _me –_  myself and what she is to me. She claims to be a guardian to me as she is to another individual.”

Coren was stroking his mustache, thinking deep, “What else she spoken of?”

You thought, “She tells me she has complete cont-” you were dropping off again, head pounding and lungs aching. So quick and sudden that you seized up.  _Strength of two men..._

Shiro's voice came distant from your hearing, voice slightly raised with worry, “It's happening again.”  _Strength of two men..._

_I can turn and twist you mind, Y/N. I am your guardian so therefore I do what's right for you._

“Could it be connected to her original condition?” Allura's voice asked, echoing across the plain. You were staring at the woman again, eyes stinging, “Let me go.” You hissed, fists clutching with anger.

“I do what's best for you.” She repeated, “I can twist your mind, Y/N, does that not frighten you?”

_Yes._

“I can call you to this plain and trap you here until I dismiss you, does that frighten you?”

 _Yes._ “Why are you doing this?” You chocked through the tears,

“Call it: building character,” she cooed, “I strike your dread and turn it against you, this is the only way you grow.”

“And you say it like it's a good thing.” You snarled, voice raising.

“It is,” She laughed, eyes regarding you, “I give you a gifts, Y/N. I have taught you how to gain you strength, now I'm forcing you into a position to do that. Will anyone know that? No. You will not tell them this. Why? Because those words will never reached your throat.”

You were going to kill her, dammit! You anger continued to build, your teeth grounding, “You threaten me in my own head?” You managed through a raw throat.

“It's your's no longer, Y/N. It hasn't been for years.” She replied, drily, “Haven't you learnt that yet?”

“No!” You snapped, causing the woman to laugh.

“ _Yes._ Just pray they are willing for the exchange.” She replied coolly, releasing you from the plain and you were back into your body again, tears staining your cheeks. You fingers were laced with Shiro's, his real hand.  _Strength of two men._

You whimpered, as his contact but could not tell him to leave. Allura and Coran stood over you, looking concerned. “ _Please,”_ you cried, as you felt Shiro's strength shift into your body. Now you understood all she had told you.  _No._

Shiro grunted, though it caused him little pain. Collapsing hard on his knees, drained completely, his hand lost your yours and the transformation was complete. And you couldn't bring yourself to cry as Shiro collapsed onto the ground. 


	22. Chapter Twenty-two - Black's Servant

“Take him out.” You commanded, your voice rigid and a void of emotion, “His remaining strength shall remain his.” The two individual strangely obeyed, as you swung your legs over the bedside and stood. The world stood strong beneath you – you could feel it's core, fiery and blistering with strength.

But you couldn't reach it source.

You followed them out, as they carried the limp Shiro, who appeared motionless and unable to hold his own. His strength would hopefully return, you thought, your own sadness dawning on you as you stepped into the light. But your physical body remained strong and unable to draw your emotions to the surface.

This was the feeling of being completely in control. And you hated it.

The Paladins was already speaking fast, shouting at Allura and Coran for answers, that they didn't even notice you among them. Allura grew rigid as she spun around, eye bared, “ _You_ ,” she accused, eyes glowing, drawing their attention to you. “You did  _this_!” She snapped, seemingly helpless.

You nodded, face still stiff and unable to show a glimpse of emotion, “I did, and he offered it willingly.”

Allura ran at you before anyone could register, fast and capable. Facing fully to her, you brushed her aside, pinning her to the nearest wall. She struggled, face twisting in fury, “He is an the planet Earth, he wouldn't know between willing and closure within the boundaries of the mind and body. You are terribly misinformed.”

She was talking about the power you had just demonstrated, you thought numbly, Earth's power only ranged from the growth of planets to the formation of the mountains – no human had touched the boundaries and remained unable to multiply  _anything_.

It hurt, because you were from Earth. And your bloodline suggested that you were complete and utterly human. Nothing in your DNA should allow you to  _drain strength from another being._ “He would've felt greater pain if he held anything against the bonds that drained him.” You answered, though the words didn't process through your head. You soul ached with the inability to control.

Someone was speaking for you, you thought startled, the woman most likely. The Paladins were protesting against your actions, Keith Bayard was drawn, and a ready position holding the length of his body. He would attack. And your body would respond.

Allura kicked out sharply, catching you in the rib-cage, you grunted, stepping back catching her foot and flipping her onto her back, her head cracking onto the wall. Keith was upon you before you paused, throwing himself into a full blow directed at the head.

You danced aside, hand catching his unprotected side and pushing him into the wall. Hunk and Pidge charged at you together, Pidge striking first, her electrical whip coiling and uncoiling, reaching for you extended limbs.

You found yourself grinned, catching the whips head, feeling the impulse of the weapon run through your hand and into your arm. Your eyes closed at the sensation, it's own energy draining into your body. The electrical power flickered across the corridor as it hissed with loss of power before becoming unresponsive in her hand.

Hunk gained on you, Bayard coming heavily onto his shoulder. He hesitated. Why would he shot a person with a friend's face? You stopped beside him, eyes weighing him heavily, “Hesitation will cost you in the game, Hunk,” you voice sounded died to even yourself. So far removed. Hunk's face drained of colour, as Allura dragged herself to her feet, Keith extended a hand to help, “Who are you?” She whispered, strays of hair falling onto her face.

You felt yourself grin, “I am that one step ahead, Princess. Your friend is safe with me, trust me. Though I am unsure of how Shiro will fair, Y/N cares for him deeply – and I have no doubt he does to in return. That is my gift to her very conscience in allowing him to still draw breath in his lungs – it was tempting to drain him completely.”

Allura eyes burned, “Who are you?” She repeated, though she made no move to interfere.

“I am Y/N now. I am that step ahead.” Came the reply. Turning on your heel, you strolled confidentially towards the training room. The helmets were placed in a formal line on the table.

You struggled against your lost body, as you reached out, feeling the texture of the helmets. You gripped your one, holding it in your hand. You felt yourself shiver, you nature instinct showing meekly through the hard surface of the stolen strength.

Shakily you placed it over your head. Your body going stiff under it. Your head pound, as panic took over. A hand reached forward, grasping your mind and turned it over. The thoughts of panic left you, but the sense of bewilderment didn't.

_I will heal you again, Y/N._

“But Shiro would've too,” you reasoned with the woman as your body took you to the hanger, and selected an aircraft.

The whole group allowed you to leave, without protest of angry conflict. And the woman that controlled you was contempt in your leaving though you mentally fought, wishing you could break the spell.

-

You found were in the mist again, walking through it, tears burning your eyes, “You have control over me in the physical world too, why would you-?”

The woman turned slowly, cold eyes narrowing into slits, “I would dare to do that because I have a right to it. You are the game piece that I must play.”

“You said-!” You protested, voice cracking.

“That I couldn't reach you across the plain? I had some control over you, not entire control, that's how I planted the images in your head. You knew this was coming before you actually wished to comprehend it. You knew days before the event. Yet you remained oblivious to the idea. You refused to heal yourself and so I was forced to come and fix you for you. You left me nothing else. You hadn't even return to that goddamn helmet again! Fool!”

“So you turned me against my friends?” You sneered.

“You forced my hand, I would've allowed you plenty of time to mingle with your friends, maybe even start something for another individual.”

“You hadn't allowed me the time!” You cried, “You hadn't told me of a freaking countdown! I am from a world where things like this are very limited!” You voice was raising against the tide of emotions, hoping to bring them back under control.

“I expect you to use that mind of yours,” She sneered, turning fulling to you.

You barked a laugh, suddenly realizing, “Those times in the plain... you were using them to bind me closer to you. The only two individuals within that plain was bound to make us blood and through that you gained the ability to tap into my mind.”

“Completely, yes,” She corrected, a small smug smile tugging on her lips, “I had to train you to drain energy from an individual, so that you may gain the strength and therefore I would be able to pull myself into you.”

 _All this time..._  the thought saddened you.

“Now, now,” she cooed, “those feelings towards Shiro have no falsehood to them, believe me. I would touch nothing like that.”

“But use them.” You spat furiously, eyes stinging again.

“It was the one step ahead you offered me, Y/N. His feelings towards you don't differ from yours, he'd allow you to drain him completely if he had to.”

You had been played on the stings for a  _long time._ You gave a struggled cry, unable to hold in the information in.  _All I believed._

“Why?” You managed through a tight throat, eyes unable to meet the person that had their hands around you completely. You were completely powerless. It shocked you. “How?”

The woman regarded you almost ruefully, “I can not give you an explanation, you must be happy with what you already know.”

 _But that's so little._ You were played with strings and you had no idea when it started, why,  _how?_ How brought you to this doom. “Will Shiro-?” You asked, unable to find the words.

Her lips dipped downwards, “He gave what I found sensible. And what I told the rest of your friends, he may or may not recover. Some people do, other's find it harder to find their strength.” Her eyes were bright, and you felt her hand in your mind again, “I can heal the hurt I caused, but then it won't give me the cause I'm looking for.”

You sighed in defeat, vision blurry, “Where you taking me?” You asked hoarsely.

A sudden smile crept onto her face, “The Emperor,” You felt the blood drain from your face as she chuckled to herself, “ _Your_ leader now. Your Black Paladin.”


	23. Chapter Twenty-three - Mistake's refusal

You were back in your body once again, very aware you had no senses like last time. There was no pain, nor confusion, your mind had been put to rest over it's captive. There were no thoughts of escape – she would sense it if you had. The jets speed was incredible, the stars becoming a daze in your eyes.

It finally slowed, and you hand left the controls, palm sweaty – your only inhabitant in how your truly felt. But your strong body remained relaxed and very aware, it's sense seemed amplified, though you could not tell. You were seeing through your eyes, but the woman was the truly seeing. She was the one hearing, feeling and quite frankly – breathing. A Galra ship overhang your location, casting a large shadow against you, their surface blocking out the sun nearest to area. Which would be roughly like a million years away. But that wasn't in light-years, so narrow it do to hundreds of light-years away.

You squinted, as your aircraft hovered, the helmet remaining tightly secured to your head. It was the first felt sensation you had felt for the entire journey. Maybe she would allow you some space within your own body after all. The screen flickered on, across the control panel, and a Galra's face flickered there, glitching momentarily.

You should felt twisted – but your body remained stationary and you stared back, “I am Y/N, the Earthling – and I have made my decision.”

-

They weren't Galra that came to meet you, it was robotic Galra – assumingly. The came to you in numbers, fully armed and looking able to bring you down – even with this strength. They paused before you, “Helmet,” The leader commanded, and your body obeyed, handing the object over. You felt your insides relaxing. They nodded, causing your face broke out into a grim smile, as you allowed them to lead you further into the corridors. Deeper into the cage that you had no chance in escaping. The thought frightened you, but your fought your head to remain cool as the air grew thicker with vented air.

_I will heal you Y/N, just follow my lead._

You couldn't reply, as the throng of Garla paused, at a doorway – it's large doors slid open at one's palm. You were shoved in, and the door was closed firmly as three filed off to join you into the – what you were assuming – was the  _Throne Room_. It was  _huge_ , darkened with the only provided was the purple lighting that cast everyone into a purple wash, at the very end of the hall, a throne was placed, heavy and jaggered. Strong and forbidding. The Garla lead the way forward. A narrow figure slipped in-beside the Throne, yellow eyes regarding you.

_Follow me._

Another figure came into the room, his heavy frame of armor throwing a daunting impression on all those in the room, a cape clicked to his shoulders as he moved gracefully towards the throne. Everyone bowed, and you followed, knees cramping. His bright purple eyes swept over the kneeling figures, lingering on your bowing head. You could his gaze crawling against you skin.

_Your Black Paladin, Y/N. You will provide him what he needs._

You were released, the woman tearing from your body, vanishing in existence. The terror set in then.  _I am a human – I have nothing he needs._

Though you had had the trust of all the Paladins and the Princess of his rival race. Though you didn't doubt that it would've been crushed as soon as you drained Shiro.

“You are the Earthling that will turn the tide of the war?” He asked, voice deep and invariably set into a growl, there was also no doubt that this was Zarkon you were bowing to. Anger coiled into the pit of your stomach, and you realized your strength still remained. You hadn't crashed yet – though their were signs that it'll soon leave with your inexperience. You stood quickly to your feet, cheeks burning red, “I highly doubt it.” You replied coldly, surprised by your own courage. Or was it foolishness.

Zarkon remained calm, eyes flickering over his mean, “Leave.” He sneered, everyone but the narrow figure next to the throne left, turning against the throne and walking away without any exchange of words.

As soon as the door slid shut, Zarkon stood, his imposing figure seemingly taller than you had first observed. Garla were a tall race, you had been informed, but Zarkon would be consider tall to the Garla, with an able body – broad shoulders and what appeared to be athletic build. Though you couldn't judge any better with the armor he wore.

But anyone would could wear that armor was bound to be strong, you mind interjected.

You fought not to drop your glaze from the purple irises as a silence covered the Throne Room. “You join us unwillingly,” he stated, not bothering to direct his tone to the figure at the Throne debris. The figure sharp face peaked from it's hood, glancing over to their leader, not missing the suggestive tone.

“She would not have come otherwise.” A woman's voice rasped,

Zarkon finally looked over to her, “And then we would think over another way,” He snarled dangerously, even the woman seemed aware of the dangerous ground she stood.

“Yes, my lord,” she replied, though her tone suggested that it didn't faze her, “and a new possibility couldn't taken longer to form. This woman is possibility that we should've even consider leaving.”

A growled rumbled in his throat, walking the length towards you. Reaching out, his hands clutched your jaw, eyes narrowing, “Are you sure about that?” He mocked towards the woman, “I feel the strength she had just claimed leaving her body.” His strength was overpowering, your bones groaning against his firm grip. You were too frightened to move. “I can feel you fear,” he gloated towards you, “you fear me, Earthling.” He purred, before letting you go, drawing away, eyes turning to the woman.

The woman daren't move, “Leaving her?” She repeated, yellow eyes guiding over to you, she stepped off the debris, a cloak pooling at her ankles as she paused. Her eyes narrowed, hands gripping into your mind, tracing over the very depths of your mind.

The ache continued, pounding against your skull until the processing paused. You felt your body withered as her soul traced the area. You had even felt anything so cold and cruel. “It appears that she managed to remained linked to the Champion.” She whispered, eyes widening. You were blind against the searing pain, “surprising – though not uncommon.”

Zarkon snarled, “If she can not contain the strength, she won't be able to pass it on. This is vital.” He warned, though the woman appeared oblivious to the warming.

“I can break this, but then this could work in our favor.” She murmured, eyes weighing your struggling form. Her hand let you go, drawing you into the present. You looked sharply up, meeting the woman's face, suddenly understanding.  _I gifting him the strength back...?_

Or that's what you had hoped.

“She is willing to gift it back,” Hagger continued, “she will be able to contain it if it wasn't for her guilt. Though I think I have something that can bring her over completely with severing the link between them.” A satisfied smile curled on her lips. And you felt her touch again – the touch you dreaded. Dread's Touch.

You couldn't do anything as your body moved on it's accord, you were bowing again, teeth firmly grounded against each other. You could already see the plan forming in her mind and you wished you didn't understand where it lead.

She had wanted your to drain individuals – and from what you gathered – wanted to gift it to him,  _Zarkon._ To generate the monster in armor. With power from Haggar, your stolen claims and his own, the Paladins would be crashed.

And you connection allowed a directed link that could possible hinder Voltron. Knock a Paladin out completely.

 _Your_ real Black Paladin was the target, and Haggar had never been more pleased.

-

You was cast into a cell, wide and large with only a bed, pillow and rough blanket set in the corner. You felt tear prick your eyes, as you left alone, the room large and quite. The door shut and coded. Haggar would, it seemed, to your own thoughts whilst you were in the cell. Which, you didn't doubted, was a  _gift_ for all the things to come. You had been ripped off, even on Earth – you had forgotten a life without a head that couldn't stand the smell of gas. Or the one who couldn't stand the thought of putting a helmet on your head.

Your good, normal life outweighed the one you currently lived in – put you couldn't see through all the mist and  _purple._

You staggered over to the bed, eyes stinging and vision going misty. You knew that it was common to leave prisoners in their cells for a couple of days. You you had no doubt that he would keep you here until you were insane from loneliness.

You hoped he did that, that way you would be incapable of cooperating and then no harm would come to the person on the other side of that freaking link. “I'm so sorry, Shiro.” You whispered, seating yourself on the hard bed, unable to cry. Laying yourself down, you couldn't help but think of the night the Paladins had saved your from the Care. Lance and Keith squabbling over how to carry you. And Pidge and Hunk greeting your warmingly as you entered the Green Lion. And Shiro with his sweet smile and handsome features. You regretted meeting them all, in that instant. You wished your had remained in the arms of the Joey and interviews. “Never make the mistake twice,” You whispered, hoping that someone would hear. Maybe Shiro... “don't come and get me again. Learn from your mistakes.” you pleaded into your knees, though your sadness remained inside you.


	24. Chapter Twenty-four - Construction's Start

It  _was_  days before the received you. They hadn't feed you, only watered you, forcing your face back and tipping the water into your mouth, leaving you to cough and wither as you chocked. You hadn't minded it though, it enabled you to smear the water of your face to keep yourself awake.

You had allowed yourself periods to sleep, after all a tired mind could not fight for itself. It needed to fresh and sharp, you'd need it in this place, you knew, Zarkon was as cunning as he was cruel. And Hagger.... she obviously stood next to the throne for a reason.

She had a power, she was intelligent and completely reasonable. Maybe that's why she frightened you, she saw her doing as something of good. She was being reasonable within their restrictions. She had reason, you sensed, to what she did, it wasn't mindless nor impatient. 

Zarkon, you thought numbly, came across as impatient – something you hadn't entirely considered about him. After all he had waited ten thousand years for this opportunity, why hadn't he seeked out them in the first place?

Maybe he simply had to rebuild his scattered Empire after the battle, and build in numbers, before he was willing to conquer the greatest weapon.

But why did he wait? Maybe he was aware of the connection of the Lions to the Paladins – for obvious reasons – and thought it'll be wise if he allowed the chosen Paladins to bring it to him. Maybe Lions picked their Paladins over the extent of a thousand years, they looked for potential owners since they departure of Voltron. And Zarkon knew what if he tried to force the Lions to take Paladins of his own choosing, that they would simply not work and respond. Maybe even, you thought stupidly, the Lions had seen to picking a Paladin from the early stages. And when the time that their meeting drew nearer, the Paladin's unconsciously had a growing desire and therefore allowed an connection with them to form, that would explain their oddly matching colouring of their clothing to their lions.

Which left another question, where that their previous other Paladins gone too, if Zarkon still remained? He was the Black Paladin, who were the other four chosen ones?

Allura had once told you that she had urged her father to form Voltron, but Zarkon was the Black Paladin, and they were the one's they were fighting against. If they had managed to get another Black Paladin to do this, then Zarkon would've been still connected to the Black Lion still – you thought, and he'd would've been able to take over it's presence.

Or were you just thinking through this too thoroughly? Maybe it was simple, and straight forward – but what had already gone on with the team had you doubting the thought entirely.

The four days had you over thinking over everything, and allowed your stomach to cramp with lack of food. The pain continued to taunt you throughout the third day, and by the fourth day it had stopped and your stomach just felt  _empty._ What you guessed was the afternoon, the Garla robotics gathered you up, and lead you down corridors, completely parallel to each other.

 _Oh!_  You suddenly thought, startling yourself,  _they keep the corridors the same so that you wouldn't be able to distinguish your way around easily by checkpoints. You had to know your way around._

It was so stupidly easy, you thought after, slightly ashamed that it had taken you this long to figure that out.

You brow furrowed at the thoughts. You mind was on overpower, thinking and creating. Your dreams seemed vivid and cruel with Shiro standing on the opposite platform, high winds whipping around him. His eyes would widen at the sight of you. You would yell at him, though you could not hear yourself. And he would reply, words barely a whisper as he grinned, eyes glowing with a shining brightest. His face would turn crudely as melt into Zarkon's and you would be left to scream.

Shiro would cry out in return.

“I see you have had much time to think over everything.” Hagger's voice cooed, voice husky. You drew yourself out of your thoughts slowly, unwilling to disobey.

“Yes,” You replied, much in the same tone, “I have.”

Hagger's eyes narrowed, eyes drifting away from yours, eyes sharp against the Garla men, “Tie her to the table.” She commanded, edging away, her clothing draping behind her. Your body tensed, your strength had drained away as Zarkon had said, and you had been weak for the second day, shivering against the second day. By the third, your strength had come back, seemingly restored.

You struggled, wrist slipping away from their grasps. You heaved your body back, gathering all your power within yourself and jumped forward. The unexpected jerk, caused the nearest to stumble, and as your feet planted themselves back onto the ground, charging for Hagger, they had collected themselves back up and took fire.

The firing even touched your skin, as you charged your way forward, the heat of the bullets searing past you. Hagger turned to meet you, eyes narrowing at the sight of you. You were crumpling to your feet, before you realized what had happened, the pain taking the first priority in your mind.

The pain tangled with your body, blazing across you core, burning your organs. You could even scream as your stumbled hard to your knees, body jerking against the electrical currents that extended from her hand.

Hagger lips thinned, as she lowered her hands, “You can not beat a teacher on the first lesson, Y/N.” She murmured drily, lips going slack.

The facial struck you as familiar. Were the woman and Hagger sisters? You thought, stricken.

Hagger scowled, as though she had heard your thoughts, but she didn't take up on the topic, as she looked hard at the men, “Tie her up.” She repeated.

They grabbed at you roughly, drawing you painfully to your feet and dragging you over to a table, it was portrait standing, slightly on a 85 degrees angle. Straps were placed at the wrist and ankles. It was torturing table, and there was no irony about it. Your life had boiled down this this moment – it had always lead up to it, you had come to decide, whether you prolonged the process or not was none of your concern now. You had to become aware of how your were going to survive each stage of existence of this alien ship. Each stage, from the smallest of things like sleeping, to the biggest things like this.

You were still bound to the woman, and she could very well overrule you. You had nothing to block her against – had no knowledge of what to actually do. You barely knew what to do when your body gather Shiro's strength and then past it on. The woman's instructions had bleed transparent after you had woken, and only the basic idea remained.

Numbly aware of them strapping in, you forced yourself to study the area around it, above was a black sort of screen, glossy and reflective. Around the table, was a slim table to your left, instruments of pain placed neatly in rows. Hagger stood a metre from you, eyes watching your every move, “I will not torture you with those, Y/N.” She oddly reassured, “I do not want you broken further.”

Maybe it wasn't reassuring, you thought bitterly, but the human mind can not help but think of it's own pain, than that if the mental intake. Glazing over to her, forcing your eyes away from the table, you kept your face unreadable.

“I have know what's in your head,” Hagger started, eyes heavy against you soul. You could feel her mind, jaggered and cruel brushing against your mind – and you knew that she never intended to break you body. But knew that she would twist your mind into what she found sensible to her cause.

You were the 'one step ahead', you mind told you, and you knew it was instantly the woman that spoke. Her voice light, but the pressure remained heavy in your heart.

Hagger grew still, eyes glowing, “I know  _everything_ about your very being. The whispers of the mist have told me.”

 _Whispers of the mist._ The plain you had walked. So the woman and Hagger were connected, you thought, eyes drifting over the room one last final time. “Did they tell you how much I hate people like you?” You snapped, feeling an unchecked anger roll in your stomach.

“Fear, not hate,” Hagger snapped back, voice sharp. Truth enough, you thought mildly, but you also hated her. Fear was you bars that kept your trapped – you learned to hate the very image of fear. That or you became fear. Timid or so spiteful.

You just chose a indecisive coarse.

“ _Yeah, but soon you'll appreciate this job for what it is – even if it isn't the idea you thought it to be in the first place. You'll grow and so will the outcome of each mission. Then you'll start to understand the true definition of; heroism. Everything thinks themselves as a hero, Lance. You just got to make sure you become the hero that reflects off everyone positively.”_

You head collided with the table behind you, wrist pulling to free themselves as the memory was pulled forward.

“ _Positively...” he tried, face suddenly brightening, “apart from if they are you enemy.” He thought aloud, looking as though he was working through the facts in his fast mind._

_You smiled, “No one is the enemy, it's the idea they have that is.”_

Hagger's voice rose over your pain, “Hate leads to thoughts of hatred – that's how we are divided in enemies.” The memory stopped, and you were left panting against your restraints.

“What do you think you're doing?” You breathed out through a tight throat.

Hagger shrugged, something strange about the gesture, but her golden eyes winked in the lights as she smiled slowly, “I am calling back the best of you, Y/N. I'm here to heal you. Create horrible images in your head, and break other's up. Zarkon will be your leader, Y/N. He'll be your greatest fear – so great you will have nothing else to fear but himself.” 

It sounded like a promise... You fought against the bonds of your hands, desperately, your wrists already itching and angry against them. Hagger straightened her posture, hands rising again.

The large screen hanging over you began to glow. And you felt yourself jerk in pain as you tumbled through time.


	25. Chapter Twenty-five - Earth's Plain

Shiro hadn't stopped pacing, since his strength had returned, pacing recklessly up and down the Control room. Keith had missed a beat as Allura's eye twitched in annoyance, her face twisting with her frustration.

“It's true.” Hunk stated more in a suggestive tone, looking at Allura for recognition.

Allura managed a halfhearted glance in his directed, “This woman has been obviously in her head for a while,” she tried again, though it seemed like it was reaching deaf ears, “the woman wouldn't be able to simply pushed out, Shiro – even if we knew how. I'm guessing – with Coran's knowledge – that this said woman has been forming a connection with Y/N, allowing everything-that-has-happened, happen.”

Keith could feel his friend's pain, Keith had felt the feeling of uncertainty more than once – and he knew he still felt it. Seeing Shiro struggle with the feelings he wasn't so sure on how express was difficult enough. Unable to offer any reassurance was close to painful. “Shiro, we'll go after Y/N. She's apart of the team. And I'm sure if you went missing all of us would go looking,” Keith offered, brow furrowing with sympathy.

Lance – who appeared as drained as an empty sink, finally spoke. Which didn't surprise Keith in the slightest, especially what he had to say. “Yeah! I mean, if I went missing, I'm sure all of you guys would help to find me.”

Keith own annoyance flared, “ _If I went missing_?” The boy mimicked, “If you can choose to go missing, help yourself.”

Lance blinked at the other boy, weighing him with a disdained look, “Maybe I will, if you stayed behind!” He shoot back, with eyebrows shooting upwards and lips pressing together.

Keith barked a laugh, “I would.”

“Walk away even!” Lance bite back, cheeks reddening.

Keith felt his lips twist, “You're missing, idiot!  _No one_ has  _any idea where you are!_  I wouldn't walk to where I could possibly find you.”

Lance crossed his arms, pouting, “Of course, Mullet, always with the smart-ass comments. If you weren't looking for me, you wouldn't be able to find me.”

“Unless you spoke,” Keith replied coldly, fists clutching together. “and didn't have so much ego.”

“ _Ego!_ ” Lance cried, standing sharply up, and body edging towards Keith, “I'm sorry-”

“It's so  _huge_ , that you can even see it from space. You know that even the Great Wall of China cannot been seen from the moon? The Great Wall is apporxmitlly 21,196 kilometres in length and maybe 9 metres in width-”

“I heard it can!” Lance interjected,

“The approximate average distance from the moon is 384,393 kilometres, that means the Great Wall is like human hair viewed three kilometres away. To see it you'd need spatial resolution  _16,000-_ ”

“Actually,17,000.” Pidge interjected, correcting the angry boy,

Keith barely noticed, “- _times better than normal eyesight._ ” The whole room was quite, before Pidge broke the silence, “And that involves with Lance because-?”

“You can see his ego from the moon.” Keith sighed heavily. Even Lance was speechless.

Lance laughed suddenly, “How well, though?” he left him no room to answer as his attention came directly to Keith, “Well, you can see  _your hair_ length from-”

“ _Guys!_ ” Shiro snapped, drawing the younger Paladins away from the current fight, “we need to focus.” He finished in a softer tone.

Allura sighed, standing from the steps – Keith hadn't even noticed that she had seated herself down, “It's clear that Y/N's.... situation has put all of you under stress. I suggest we rest – Lance I suggest to go and have something to eat, and everyone else-.”

“Rest?!” Everyone but Shiro cried, thought Shiro's glowed with determination. Coran nodded, pulling at his facial hair, “If we are to do any good for Y/N, we must be at our very best.”

The determination from Keith's friend, never left his eyes, but his shoulder slumped, “Alright then, guys get some rest. We'll see to it afterwards.”

Lance's face twisted, “What?” He asked stupidly, “You liked her, Shiro – and don't deny it – and you're are willing to keep her in the arms of those who did  _this_ to you?”Lance gestured wildly to all of Shiro, who's lips thinned. Lance was getting at something, and even Keith couldn't deny that it sounded logical.

“I have to agree with Lance, she's vulnerable as it is, leaving her to fight the battles she doesn't need, is asking Lance not to listen to his music.”

Lance didn't even seemed offended as he nodded, “And asking Keith to wash his hair” Keith felt his annoyance climbing into his stomach, but he pushed it down.

“Asking Hunk not to eat.” Pidge pointed out, with a satisfied smirk,

“And asking Pidge not to be sassy.” Hunk agreed, with approving nod.

Shiro reflected their words with a moments silence. Finally he spoke, “I know, and it kills me not to go after her. But we have to know what we're getting ourselves into here. They took her for a reason – and we have no idea what the purpose is yet.”

The four Paladins sighed in unison.

Shiro's lips tugged downwards, and Keith understood how much it took him to say those words. Keith – sighing heavily again – stepped towards the door, “Come on guys, Shiro's right.” He encouraged, Hunk stood first, “And then we go and save Shay's people after.” He commented, as Lance puffed out his cheeks.

“Wow, we are booked out.” He murmured into his shirt, “I'm going to eat, I'm  _hungry_.” Strangely everybody followed him out.

-

 _Shiro._ You called, eyes drifting through the landscape of Earth. It was the Garrison's backdoor, where you had introduced overhanging skies, and starry nights to you mind once again. The sand extended out, in softer rolls, before becoming jaggered and sharp as they continued on.

Maybe that's why you liked to planet the Castle of Lions was on, you thought absentmindedly, it almost mimics the geographic plan of the land.

“Shiro?” You whispered, this time your voice reaching out and echoing. You were shouting, but you didn't remember when you got worked up enough to be like that. “Shiro!?” You called, stepping forward, further into the sandy plain.

You were almost dreaming, but this – you decided – was a little to real to be all such an unspecific name.

_Reaching across the plains._

You shook your head, your wild hair flickering across your face, “Shiro?” You whispered, as no one joined you.

“Y/N?” Shiro voice drew you to the ledge, as he pulled himself up. His chest was heavy with ragged pants. “What are you doing here?” He asked, brow creasing as he jogged up to meet you.

“This is a dream.” You told him instead of answering his question, “I am not here, but this is the only plain that we are both connected in to communicate nonetheless.”

His thumb traced your cheekbone, eyes looking soulfully at you, “Tell me you are alright.” He murmured,

You managed a soft smile, hand lacing with his given hand, it was cool to touch, “I'm are alright,” you replied for his sake, “they don't look to hurt me physically.”

“But mentally?” He whispered, placing his forehead on yours. You leant into his touch, willing for tears to go down.

“I will try not to change.” You managed, through a thick throat.

His shoulders tensed, “Tell me.” He murmured, soothingly.

You didn't even hesitate, “The woman has allowed me my own mind in the cells, I am me in this plain, but Hagger is looking to fix me from my behaviours and make me into a capable... follower of Zarkon. Each time we meet, I will be different again – but I swear I am the same person.”

“This will be the only one, Y/N,” he promised, “We're coming for you.”

“No!” You cried, drawing away from his touch, you kneeled, taking his hands in yours, “Don't make the same mistake, Shiro. You got me once, and look what has happened... I will find a way to you, but do not come without my terms. Zarkon plans on using.... what we have.... against you.” Tears stung your eyes, “And Hagger already knows what she'll do when you come for me.”

He kneeled to your height, drawing you into an embrace, strong arms wrapping around your waist, “I need to get you, Y/N.” He mumbled into your neck, voice thick.

You sobbed into his, “I know you feel like you have to, I do. But trust me, I will find you again in my own terms. I'll make sure the demons that I have do not follow me home.”

“Home,” Shiro repeated,

“You,” you breathed, “you are the home, the team is my home. I will not forget that.” You promised.

“You-” Shiro started, voice thin as though he was in pain, before he drew himself away from the embrace and kissed you soundly. You kissed him back, welcoming his warmth and safety, you heart aching against his touch.

You draw from it, eyes bright with tears. Shiro's eyes shinned with his own, “I...I... _-_ ” he was speechless, unable to form the words he had rolling in his mind.

You smiled ruefully, knowing where his thoughts lead, “Don't come for me, Shiro. I'll be here in the nights, if you wished to see me, meet me here.”

“How-?” He asked, unsure, hands still cupping your face.

“If I call you and you'll respond.” You responded, hands finding his shoulders.

Shiro cussed, surprising you with using his heritage language. You found yourself laughing softly, “I know.”

A sudden smile broke out on his face, “This is the hardest thing I've had to do.” He admitted, breathlessly.

“Thank you,” You thanked, knowing he'd now follow you pleas and wait.

Shiro's touch softened against you skin in a silent farewell, “I can not promise you that I will remain quite.”

“And I don't expect you too,” You told him gently, “they expect you to bite back, make a bit of a show. Allow them to think you have taken their bait.”

“Maybe I will,” Shiro muttered bitterly, eyes hardening to the east. The sun rose slowly against the horizon.

You  _tsked_ , “No.”

Shiro looked guiltily back at you, “I know,” he whispered, “you're right on this. But if your plan doesn't fit into the next few weeks, I am personally going to lead the charge into battle with Zarkon.”

“You do it anyway.” You mumbled, sighing. “ _'A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.'_ ” You quoted faithfully, with a small smile.

Shiro allowed himself a soft smile, “John Maxwell?”

You nodded into his shoulders, gazing to the east, and you stayed like that until you awoke.


	26. Chapter Twenty-six - Galra's Traitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh guys?? Last time I updated it was the wrong chapter - so don't mind me as a erase all evidence of it and put this chapter in it's place. 
> 
> Sorry guys!

_A week later..._

Shiro responded every night and you were glad for his company. You would be shivering, eyes heavy at his answer, descending towards you. The days events drained you completely, the transformation inside your mind seemed to be shifting already – and that frightened you. You were still the same mind, as far as you could tell, you still thought like yourself.

But you were feeling better, mind clearer than you had ever had it, noticing things that you had long ago forgotten about.

Hagger hadn't tested you yet to see if her work was working – maybe she already knew it was, and was brutal, easily gathering your memories and placing them in order. You saw every memory she grabbed, you would struggle and scream for her to get out of your head, but against the restraints you were nothing to her power. You were an trapped animal, being scientifically tested in a lab.

Hagger knew more on your world than you cared to comprehend. She stored to thoughts that process in your mind, stored the knowledge and memories. Once she had the kindness of telling you, that it wasn't herself that stored them within herself. And that no one, not never herself could reach them again.

But Hagger's memory was wicked, no matter how much she couldn't revisit the information that had been drawn from your mind.

You felt grateful that she allowed your memories within the cells to remain untouched. After all, she had once cooed, “Someone needs a grounding -  _a secret –_  place in their mind.”

You suddenly became aware that maybe she had known your meetings with the Leader of the Paladins. But she had made no mention of it, nor hinted again. You had told Shiro of your suspicion. He too had brushed it aside, before he smiled, “Then I won't tell you my plans then, hmmmm?”

You had left it at that.

Often in the plain of Earth, Shiro would simply hold you, as you trembled into his chest, teeth rattling from the cold. He would rock you, as you talked, sometimes of Earth, sometimes of things that had happened with Shiro – the small pranks Lance had attempted to pull to make Shiro stop frowning. Or the helpfulness that Keith now demonstrated. None of you touched your day, nor Shiro's missions. Only small talk distracted the two young adults from there separation.

You had left home as soon as you were able – money wise – and you never looked back, you had missed them, but you were content with want you had. Now you realized what some suffered.

You could only recall a couple of times where you had suffered from homesickness. But they were only a flashes of glimpses home and a longing of your parents voice.

Now you knew how other's suffered. The Voltron team had not been your family for long, but they had carved a great mark into your skin. You heart ached for them – or your nighty walks with Shiro – the conversations you had with each individual – but deeper down Shiro was the individual you wanted.

Each meeting with him, brought you no comfort, nor him to you. He was growing uneasy with each greeting. You could see it in his hands, as the fidgeted, and the disturbed glaze in his eyes. You sighed heavily, glazing upon his open face and finding signs of worry, “Shiro?” You asked, your voice barely a whisper.

His eyes averted to your face, dilating smaller, “Hmmm?” He managed.

“What's on your mind?” You asked bluntly, letting go of his hand. He immediately laced them back together again, but his gaze dropped.

His prosthetic hand was drawing lines on the back of your palm, “I've been thinking,” he replied with a moments silence. You waited, watching the tracing of his finger, his eyes found yours again, “you are growing weaker with each meeting-”

He had brought it up yesterday, as a side comment, you thought startled, suddenly remembering. “Yes.” You coughed, chest heavy.

“And, I know you are reluctant to do this, but I think it'll be sensible if you took my energy.” He finished, drawing straight to the situation.

You blinked furiously, “What?”

“You are growing weaker, Y/N. If you at least drain some of the energy from me, then you could use it.”

His finger stopped drawing patterns as he stared expectantly at you, “What if I say no?”

“Then you will die.” Shiro said simply, looking at your hard. He had been thinking of the subject for awhile, you thought, probably thinking up ways on how to put those very words. But sometimes the simplest ways are the best to take.

“That'll be highly unlikely-” You started,

“Yes, of course,” he interjected, “they won't let you. Hagger is pushing you into a breaking point, and when the time is upon you, she'll force you to drain an unwilling victim – whether that survive the encounter or not, is up to there own willpower. But Hagger won't start with the soldiers – she'll started with the prisoners. Maybe some from the camps, were they have strength to drain. But you will take it nonetheless, whether that woman is controlling you or not.”

You hadn't thought of that in that way. It was so brutally accurate. You felt your tears sting with the pressure of tears.

“Would you rather drain a willing person, than someone how is frightened of you?” He asked, voice thick with emotion. His eyes shone with agony and passion – something you hadn't known that a human could feel at once, for the same thing.

“Shiro,” you voice broke, tears blurring your vision. You hadn't wept in eight days – something like a new record for you. “Please, I-I-” You broke off, a great sense of panic arose. His very words crushing your soul.

You drew yourself away from Shiro, standing clumsily. “I can't.” You replied, tears falling onto your cheeks. “I can't.” And then you left the plain of Earth and awoke.

-

You awoke slowly, eyes adjusting moments after your eyelids open. .You body was heavy and aching already. Hagger didn't look to change you physically, but your sure felt like she had. Swinging your legs over the hard bed, you gingerly stood. You are a piece of a game, you mind repeated, as you looked cautiously around the room. Books often spoke of war like a broad game – a lot like chess, and you couldn't help but think that maybe you were one of those soldiers.

Creeping over to the door of your cell, you forced yourself into a stillness. The room silence breathed into the corridor, as you heard Garla men pass on their patrols.

You hadn't heard before yesterday actually. On the fourth day, you were too tired to stand after the day. The soldiers dragged you and cast you into your room, closing to door. Your body immediately shut down, and you awoke next to the door, quite and very aware. There you heard the routines of the men change, and you weren't alone anymore.

Even if the company was the enemy, you told yourself, it's a presence I need to remember who I fight for.

You fought for the Paladin's of Voltron, and the Alteans. You fought for Earth's survival, and the rest of the planets freedom. Not for the Garla Empire, or their great leader, Zarkon.

There was only one Black Paladin now, Zarkon refused to believe that he couldn't remain the strongest against the Champion. You believed Shiro could move the tied with the Black Lion, he was good, and Zarkon had inked his name in black – not what the Black Lion stood for, but something twisted and evil.

But Zarkon still had a chance, you reflected, he had the Bayard, and Shiro only the arm that had been given to him in his slave life.

Forcefully given, you mind reflected, as the door opened.

You sighed heavily, stepping out before the man could gather you by the arms, and held out your wrists. A Garla – different from the other's you had seen, and meet – weighed your with a cautious glaze. He carried himself with unspoken confidence and accuracy. He nodded, “Come.” He commanded, leaving no room for argument.

_What?_

When you didn't follow, he stopped, yellow eyes narrowing. With a exaggerated huff, he gripped your right wrist and lead you through the corridors. His grip was firm and strong, close to painful, as he moved through the halls with feline grace.

He was a warrior, you decided, noticing his posture, well, all the Garla were warriors, but this Garla moved differently than those who had collected you before.

He was light-footed, and patient enough. Strong but lean. If you had hadn't the dignity, you would've admitted that his face was well-structured too. And we all know what a 'well-structured' face is considered as...

He stopped at the chamber of the table and black glass screen, looking back at you, the door slid open, at his touch on the panel, and he pushed you inside, before closing the door after him. You staggered, but managed to keep your feet as you spun around to meet the Garla, fear crawling into your stomach, taking note that no one was here.

He froze, his pointed ears, moving slightly towards the door, then he relaxed. He turned to you, eyes watching your stiff form, “I am Thace.” He introduced himself, “I have been notified that you are from the team Voltron.”

 _Oh god._ You stared at him blankly, “Yes?” You managed through a tight throat.

“I will help you escape, the team needs no distractions in the battle against Zarkon. We are fighting the same battle, you and I.” He continued, voice strong and informative.

“Oh?” You managed, your top lip curling.

A gentle smile tugged on the right side of his lips, “Yes, we are. I just happen to be free and you're – as you can see – are not. But same side nonetheless.”

You felt lips thin, “Now that's what gets me, you are free and I am not. I am doubtful that if you were on the same team as me, that Zarkon would allowed you to walk around in his on base.”

The smile tugged to his left side, “True, but what if he didn't know?”  _Checkmate._


	27. Chapter Twenty-seven - Plain's Measure

“What do I have to do?” You whispered, suddenly aware of the room both of you stood.

Thace looked at you hard, “I will insert whereabouts of people that can help your rise with Voltron-”

“Help Voltron gain power?” You asked stupidly, as the Galra sent you an annoyed glance.

“No. You.” He corrected, “You will need to follow them as soon as you escape – don't warn your friends of what you intend, I fear that Zarkon has a greater hold on Voltron, and if he learns of your whereabouts through the connection, he'll destroy you before you can return.”

It was starting to make sense, you thought mildly, weighing the killer up with one disdained look, “You will insert them where?” You asked, voice heavy against your throat.

Thace's eyes narrowed, looking as uncomfortable as you had ever seen a Galra be, “In the dimensions Hagger daren't touch” 

“The dimensions,” you managed sharply, as he nodded slowly, “she can go anywhere!”

“No, she daren't go to all, especially the one you walked now – ones from your memories. If she touches those, she is destroying the actual memory that you can created and therefore you will have nothing to ground you,” He drooled out, sharply, his serious coming back, and discomfort thrown away. He glaze at you hard, before standing where Hagger usually stood. You noted how his shoulders were set in an stiff angle.

You meekly walked over to the table, shaking. The air was always warm here, but by gosh, you felt freezing. You had only been dragged up to the table, and then the restraints would link into place, holding you to the cool surface, but now you willing stood before it, hesitating as you thought through the obvious flaw in Thace's story.

Which wasn't entirely his fault... he was Galra. Chosen or not, he had blood in his veins that linked him to the killers that threatened to universe.

And that created a tearing gap of indecisiveness in your body. You looked at you, setting your chin, “Why do you do this?” You asked, voice shaking as goosebumps traveled up your spine.

“I do this to protect the universe for certain death.” He responded, voice slowly dropping off into a softer tone.

It was an answer enough, you thought, sitting yourself down to the table, and doing your best to lay down, without slipping off. The table was hard against your back and smooth, biting against your bear neck. “Hagger has... magic...” you tried to explain, finding another flaw, “... to access my memories, you have nothing of that ability.”

Thace sighed heavily, shoulders slumping forward, “That's why you will take me to one of the dimensions.”

 _The Plains?_ It suddenly dawned on you, “What? I have no-!” You cried out, jerking forward to sit back onto the edge of the table and glare willfully at the Galra.

His face remained indifferent, “You have the power to control energy, Y/N of Earth. You can divide and control –  _contain._ You must contain me into the dimensions, of your choice.”

This was getting too much. “What-?” You tried, feeling your frustration crawl up your throat, so you tried again, voice cracking like a whip, “I have nothing.”

“Yes,” he helped sarcastically, “you have nothing -no sense, no patience and no knowledge.”

“ _No sense._ ” You repeated, voice rising higher.

“ _Yes,_ ” he drooled out, “None. Do as I say, Y/N, or this could get us both killed.”

“You most likely,” you corrected, mimicking his tone.

“No both of us with time, she'll get the information I keep – somehow, though I have been trained against her hand. But the information I keep is dangerous, and will cast a long shadow – much too long to hide. She see you of no use after that, once you've done the luring of your team members, and then we'll both possibly be killed in the same room.”

“I beat by Hagger's magic,” you thought loudly,

“Or by the ways of the iron tools.” He added, almost in the same distant tone, “either way if as formidable as the other, Y/N. You must do this, for your team members, and the universes'. We can't allow Zarkon have you if his reach if we want to crush the Empire.”

You nodded stiffly, pushing our crippling doubts aside. “What...” you breathed deeply, “... _how_ am I to do this?” You asked weakly, hoping that this was a hoax – maybe another crazy dream, anything but what now presented actually.

Taking someone to the plains you traveled was worse than walking by yourself.

He smiled suddenly, and gentle, uncertain gesture, “You have do something like this with Shiro, though he wasn't present within your hold at the time. We do not share a bond of any sort, though which will limit your choices – and if I might be so blunt – I'd rather keep it that way. But physical contact should be able to pull me through.”

 _Should._ You scowled, body tense, “Right...” you looked up to the black screen, seeing your reflection through it's sleek screen, “this machine helps direct them – I think. It's a storage unit, that helps create and move. Usually... usually I'm asleep when I travel-”

“I could knock you unconscious.” He offered plainly, startling you. 

You managed him a frown, “ _Thanks_...” you cooed sarcastically, “but I'd prefer not to have a lump on my head, considering how 'low profile' this is meant to be.”

His eyes narrowed, suggesting that he thought you were completely stupid, “I won't knock you around the  _head_ ,” He stepped forward, as you gave him a pointed look, “but I will refrain from knocking you unconscious, so get sleeping.”

You snorted, surprising yourself and the Galra standing before you. You shared a wide-eyed look, before you sighed, “Fine,” you mumbled into your knees, and you pulled yourself into a laying position. “physical contact,” you pointed out, holding out your hand, unsure on how he'll take the gesture. He hesitated before taking you hand. You closed your eyes, allowing your body to seemingly sink into the table pressed behind you, the humming of the screen above you grew louder to your ears and you knew that you were already being pulled in. The familiar tug of entering to vast plains overcame you as you passed through your memories. The picture fluttering away from you. You had been here before, you realized with a shiver. Hagger had often taken your mind here to gather selected ones.

You stepped past them, ignoring to barely audible tones that ranged across the plain. Beyond, you knew, was the dimension that you needed to enter, and select.

This was something completely and utterly new to you. You glazed at Thace, aware of his hand around yours.  _Never lose contact,_ his eyes pleaded.

You paused at the raw emotion, brows furrowing, but you promised it nonetheless, “I won't.” And you continued walking, mind wondering against the plain.

“I have never come this way,” you started, voicing your own doubts, “I am always within the plain, and never outside.”

The conversation obviously needed, the Galra answered to your unsure voice, “Yes, probably from the different angle to are excess it.”

You offered him an nervous chuckle, “Yeah, can't see the differences between sleeping and closing your eyes – but never mind.”

“The mind works is mysterious ways.” He said instead of rising to your argumentative tone.

You nodded, allowing the conversation to lapsed into silence. Moments passed and the Galra finally spoke again, “Do you know how far this dimension expands for?” The words were thick on his tongue.

You shrugged, “One of the plains I have walked would take me thousands of light-years to walk out. Other's I'm assuming are closer to the current one?” You had no idea that you would string a sentence like that ever.

“This one is assumingly the outer-ring,” he looked over his shoulders, your memories growing smaller on the horizon, “where the conscience mind can go to, possibly the nearest dimension are where the unconscious mind can follow in your dreams. A maybe further on only a selective few can travel-”

“Like myself,” you mumbled bitterly, you shook off the dark feeling, “you're probably right I guess.”

His looked suggested that he hadn't finished the train of thought, “And maybe the ones you are connected to are closer to your area. I imagine that there are everyone's memories here, but there could be links from dimension to dimension, like the Earthling memories are linked to your home planet Earth.”

It all made sense – and it was the wildest things that you had ever heard – but it made sense.

“So you're saying that if-”

“Do you have an object that is from Earth?” He asked suddenly, causing you to flinch.

You frowned, your free hand going to your necklace that you had forgotten about – a lot. It was warm against you skin, tucked at the back of your neck. You pulled it to the front, you eyes stinging, “Yes, this.” You showed the beautiful thing to him through your fingers.

He nodded, “It's worth a shot.”

Clasping the necklace, feeling slightly like a fool, you closed your eyes thinking hard. The energy from your memories lingered across you skin, offering gentle whispers of the past. The ground shook gently, moving in gentle waves that didn't disturb you. You opened your eyes, and cried out.

You stood in your parents house, the windows open and offering light. Tears stung your eyes, as you sobbed. It was as you remembered it, light and homey with heavy set curtains and soft carpet.

Thace was frozen, face pitched in a sense of panic, “Is this...?” he was unable to finish.

You nodded, “This is the place I first received this necklace,” you replied honesty, “my parents home, on my 21st birthday. I had just come back from the third world countries, and...” you throat tightened, “and my brother gave me this, wrapped in a lilac ribbon and pretty designed box that matched,” you remember it all to clear.

The Galra's eyes drifted out of the window, “This is Earth?” He asked, unsure. Outside, you knew, would be a clear, large garden, with rows of flowers of different colours and perfumes, and beyond that would the high cliffs that channelled a large river underneath it's banks. On the other side of the house, there would be a small driveway, with overhanging trees that marched along either side.

You nodded, “A little bit yes, just outside of one of our cities. It's quite here, whilst in the cities it offers a different sort of colours, and atmosphere.”

It was a little bit more than just outside of town. But never-mind.

His eyes dilated, as he considered the outside world, “The empire will destroy it's beauty.” He simply stated, before looking at you hard, “we Galra use to have a home of beauty as well, with high ridges and small steams, patches of wild grasses among the sandy soil, with large oceans.Our cities, supposedly , were great and scrape the skies with their high towers, red flowers growing in the fields.” he explained almost ruefully, “I never knew it's atmosphere, nor got to witness it's said beauty for my own eyes. Though I remember as a child of the stories from the elders.”

You watched him, disbelieved that he had spoken of his own situation. His own unsure past and almost childish wonder.

He came back, lips thinning, “This will be good enough,” nodding firmly, he tugged you to the nearest wall, before placing his large palm against it's surface, eyes closing.

Moments passed and he opened them again, “They are within the walls of this home. Seek them out once you have escaped.”

You nodded sharply, opening your mouth to respond until he froze, shoulders stiffening, eyes widening. He looked down at his arm dumbly, his actions suddenly slow.

Across his forearm blood markings creased across his skin, blood rising from the marks. “Hagger is coming.” He whispered as bruises started to litter across your arms.


	28. Chapter Twenty-eight - Brother's Blood

You opened your eyes, heart colliding to your rib-cage, jumping into your throat. Your arms ached, bracing against the pain that flood over them. Your body was being dragged up, away from Thace's kneeling body, hands flaying away from each other.

You struggled against the rough hands that was bound around your body, “Let me go!” You snarled, an unknown energy, Thace responded to your voice, eyes flickering open and his presence flooding back into his body.

He stood sharply, the killer rising from his slumped position, teeth bared. You continued to struggled, against the Galra dragging you away the table snarled in response.

Thace's face broke, “No!” He cried, pouncing forward, arms reaching to grab you.

The Galra released you, throwing you to the nearest wall, your head whipping back into the firm surface. The room darkened as you crumpled at the base.

The two Galra meet with their weapon, their sword's identical, flashing in utter brilliance. “It is my time.” The other grunted out, parrying away the blow that Thace delivered.

The swords sparked, as they locked together, “Or mine.” He replied, voice thick. You hadn't heard such raw emotion in that Galra before. The other Galra's face twitched as he struggled against the stronger strength and emotion. His eyebrows quaked, and you saw striking similarities in the two that drew blades.

You understood the situation.

The door slide open, and Hagger walked in, as the other Galra struck low, just below the rib-cage. Thace grasped in shock, sword flashing in his palm, as he responded desperately.

Hagger's droids came in after the witch, followed by Galra droids as Hagger rose her arms. The Galra froze, shoulders tensing and muscles tightening. Thace panted as he forced himself away, weapons flashing again as it returned to the small dagger. “Hagger.” He managed through heavy breaths.

Hagger moved forward, “Do you feel the betrayal, Commander Thace?” Her husky voice cooed, “Your own brother looked to betray the Empire.”

Thace straightened at the statement, mouth opening to respond, as the Galra turned sharply on his knees, using his strength to throw himself at the witch, teeth bared.

He was cast aside, bod falling hard to the side next to you. The Garla groaned, body shifting gingerly. Hagger  _tsked_ , at the broken male.

His head turned to you, eyes weighing heavily against your skull. He was just a boy, you saw past the warrior mask, with the similar face structure of Thace's more ragged. “My time,” he mouthed, with a pained smile, he closed his eyes gathering his strength.

He pulled himself painfully up, face Hagger in a rebellious posture, “You think you can control all the Galra,” he sneered, voice an tone younger than that of Thace's.

The ugly truth hit you. You brow furrowed, your heart aching again, “No.” You rasped, gathering all the attention. Hagger's lips peeled back in disgust, “Take that traitor away,” her eyes looked to Thace who remained stiffly next to the table, “and Commander Thace, you will make sure you know how exactly how you feel.”

“No!” You cried, standing, the world shifting at your feet, but you charged nonetheless. The boy followed your example, kicking our furiously at the hands that held him, slipping out of their grasps, as he turned to meet their weapons, hands reaching to snap their necks.

Hagger threw you off, her droids moving to surround her. Their electrical power crashing the wind out of you, with a scream of pain. You crippled, body falling weakly to the left, you eyesight weaving.

The brother of Thace grabbed at your body, desperate for a moment, before pulling you to his chest, you body feeling light. “Y/N!” He snapped, as he stood straighter to watch as everyone sagged forward.

Thace stepped to the front, face hard, “Let her go,” he warned, voice low and rough the snarl that came in response.

“The Empire shan't keep her.” He replied, arms tightening around you. You grabbed at his arms, feeling the texture of his fur.

Thace's eyes closed for a moment, “So be it,” he managed, voice catching as he threw his weapon, the dagger casting wild before striking his brother in the neck. Blood squirted across your face, blinding you as the Galra's knees buckled.  _No._

His arms fall loose by his side, and you fall hard, you body slamming against the cool surface of the floor. Thace's brother fall with you, collapsing fully onto you, entrapping you against his seer weight, the blood from his neck, gashing out.

He was dying, you knew, as he jerked. You sobbed, hand reaching to press against the wound. And you were back into the plains, the texture against your back shifting as you lay underneath the grasping Galra. You rolled him over, kneeling beside the dying boy, eyes wide with shock of the ending tunnel, suddenly came clear, “You are-” he grasped, before chocking on his blood.

You felt the tears fall onto his face, “Thank you,” You breathed out, before grabbing on the knife in his neck, as he grasped, “thank you, be at peace now.” You punctured it in, with one clean motion, ending his life. His body grew still. You sobbed, drew out the weapon from his neck, and lay it to his chest, gripping the weapon firmly. You closed your eyes again, before laying his body to rest in a field of poppies, that grew wildly next to the river.

It was his home where he was born, you knew. And he'd rest there easy – and then you let go.

You woke, you body stiff, feeling the boy's body give and crumple into nothing. Thace had told you not to let him go in the plains, and you understood why.

Thace's body was where it was meant to be.

You pulled yourself to your feet as Hagger screamed, “No!” Her voice was shrilled.  _What did you do?_ The woman was in your body again, chocking your furiously with her own anger.

“I lay him to rest.” You snarled, looking hard to Thace, as the woman's presence suddenly subsided away.

You knew the pain of loosing a brother, someone that held your second half, made you who your were. You heaved on your knees, breathing heavily, as the Galra droid collected your body – your mind to muddled to respond to the comments that were made. “You killed your own brother.” You coaxed out, through a raw throat. Something told you that this wasn't his fault, nor the boy's. It was your own, but you couldn't help the venomous comments that spilled out of your cracked lips.

Thace watched indifferent as you were dragged out.

-

Your body was unresponsive, your body tired and unable. You were physically exhausted, as your energy drained back into Thace. It was his energy, you concluded, that you had taken, which disturbed you to no end – he hadn't wished for you to bond with him, but he had. Why? You had no clue. You forced yourself to pace, legs quivering with each step.

When your leg ached, your stopped and sat on your bed, hands gripping firmly on it's edge. The door slide open, and Thace stood there, seemingly unsure, “You killed your brother.” Was all your could say, unsure whether you were trying to hand your pain to the Galra at your door, or to bluntly show him how much you had disrespected that decision.

The door slide shut, before you could catch the water that collected at the corner of his eyes, “It is our duty.” He repeated firmly, only offering a slight weaving in his voice.

You suddenly felt ashamed, your first reason – whether it was a reason or not – passed onto him, you watched as he approached, “I- I sorry.” You finally stuttered, head bowing.

“I am too,” he managed, voice thickening. A silence crept into your cell forming around the two individuals.

And you stubbornly pushed it aside, “Will they notice your absence?” You asked,

His head bowed, “They sent me straight back to work, whether he was my blood brother or not, they do not care. I ended his existence, it is my burden to bare alone.”

You stood, coming chest to chest with the Galra, you looked at him ruefully, “He-” you tired and failed, watching the moisture in his eyes fall onto his face.

“He knew what one of us had to do, so the other could survive. He just got there before I could.” He whispered, voice hoarse as he watched your frail body.

You embraced him, soundly as you could, arms shaking with the effect. “He will forever have my thanks, Thace. Him and your family. Thank you.”

He pulled roughly from your embrace, unable to piece together the affection you showed him, so he bowed, knee folding in underneath him, “No, you have mine, Y/N lady of the Champion and the Black Paladin of Voltron,” he managed through a thick throat, “you lay my brother's body in a peaceful state – something that us as Galra have not had the honor of doing for the last ten thousand years...” his voice dropped off in a whisper, “...I-I-” He tried, suddenly unable to form words.

You smiled ruefully, “It is your energy to keep now, Thace. This bond you have allowed me, was one of the reason I could carry your bother into the plains.”

He managed a weak smile, as he stood, towering over your again, “My thanks.” And then he left, allowing you to your own crippling silence as you lay down to rest, with one thought on your mind:  _Why had he allowed it?_

You found that your couldn't find the answer.


	29. Chapter Twenty-nine - Emperor's Strength

When you eyes did close, you found yourself standing in the plain of Earth, watching as Shiro approached you. “Shiro,” You greeted, you energy to it's end, “you shouldn't have come.”

“Where you go, I will follow.” He responded, voice rough as he reached to you, gathering you to his chest, “What happened?” He soothed, he was tired too, you noticed, though you knew better than to ask.

“I have crossed through the Plains,” you answered, “my body is not use to the transaction, between them.” You shivered, the atmosphere quite and chilling to the bone.

“Y/N,” Shiro started, brows furrowing, “you shouldn't come here, if it affects you. You must focus on an escape.”

You didn't bother correcting him – let him think you still were unable to think of an escape, but now that Thace was on your side, you end was coming quickly. “I know, but... but this is my only escape.”

“Sometimes the darkness of a dreamless sleep can be more comforting than company.” He pointed out, softly, breath warm against neck as he nuzzled into your neck, attempting to keep your warm.

“The dark still scares me.” You childishly murmured in response – you actually weren't to certain if you were anymore, after all, your fears seemed to be a passing thing. Shiro looked out to the Garrsion, eyes shining and glassy.

A silence flooded in, and you hadn't felt so alone. Shiro was holding you in his strong arms... but he was barely there, you could see it in his distant glaze. “Do the team know of our meetings?” You asked hoarsely, trying to block out the fear of losing.

He looked back at you, eyes adjusting to your face. He didn't reply and you took it as his answer. With no small amount of frustration you wondered why. “You are dying.” He managed instead, looking quickly away again. That was the reason, you suddenly realized, he was scared.

“No, they won't allow that,” You assured, though you weren't as certain anymore. Why were you so tired? Why weren't you gaining any energy?

Shiro snorted, almost annoyed, “Do you seriously believe that?”

You silence told him all your internal conflict that battled, as you stared blankly at the lovely human being. He sighed, “I don't, Y/N. That's why I haven't said anything to the rest of the team. How would they respond to you dying? They are already looking to save you, Y/N. But the Voltron Code constantly blocking them –  _I'm_ blocking them. You pleaded for me to hold still, Y/N-” his voice was pained, he trailed off unsure on where he was with his desperate rant.

“I know,” I breathed out, eyelids drooping, “I want you to stay where you are. Zarkon will otherwise wield you.”

“Wield me?” Shiro asked, voice sharp. “I am nothing to that Empror-”

Did Shiro know that he controlled the Black Lion who's previous owner was Zarkon? The Galra leader was wanting blood from the Champion, but you couldn't bring yourself to say it, why had Allura hid the truth from the team?

 _Shiro has to be stronger_ , you pleaded silently to whomever would listen. You smiled grimly, the people that would be the only ones listening would be possibly Hagger and the woman. That's why you didn't utter a word. If Hagger knew of their lack of knowledge then it could be turned against them.

The Galra had ruled the universe for  _ten thousand years,_ and they lived in it for much longer, they knew this place like you knew your flat back of Earth. Everyone said that one army could overpower ten armies if they had the advantage of familiar territory.

But their lives haven't been threatened by Voltron for that amount of time – who is in the familiar territory?

No one, the Galra haven't been put to the test for years – maybe some rebel groups could coax out some numbers, but never like this. Never this dense.

“You are the leader of the Paladins, Shiro. You are what Zarkon needs.” You replied, with a weak cough.

Shiro looked down as you as you rest heavily onto his shoulder, “Y/N, at least get some rest.” He tried, his fingers pulling away strands of wild hair away from your face so he could get a better look.

“Shiro...” you groaned, “...this is as close to sleep as I will be able to manage.” It was pretty close to the truth, Thace's brother's sacrifice would haunt you for awhile longer.

“Why?” He breathed hesitantly, grey eyes watching you intently and when you didn't answer, he muttered inaudible under his breath. “Y/N, you need to talk to me.”

But you couldn't bring yourself to answer, you body sagging in exhaustion.

You barely felt his fingers brush your chin, as he kissed your temple, the warmth of his body becoming overbearing. “Take my energy, Y/N,” he murmured into the sweet kiss.

You didn't want to, you body locked in position, and your breath caught in your throat.

His lips drew to your ear, “Take as much as you need to fight another couple of days,  _please_.” His warmth empowered you, bring a chocking bliss around you. You heaved against his scent, your fingers physically aching at the conflict that battled. “ _Please_ , Y/N, do it.”

Pressing his forehead to yours, he sighed deeply, drawing you closer, locking his fingers with yours. You palms ached with the temptation. You wanted this connection, it to blaze across the distance that separated you and him.

_You and him._

With shallow breaths, you pressed your forehead back against his, feeling his presence wrap around you. He had given this thought, you thought dimly, realizing the complete openness of his body. He may have been willing last time, but this was intentional. Something pure and passionate.

You leaned heavily into his warmth, allowing the hungry to make your way through the contact, managing to catch a sentence that drifted to you.  _I am willingly yours._ You kissed him, pressing your lips firmly to his lips, feeling the slightly chapped texture of his lips. His body sagged backwards, falling onto the ground on his back as the energy exchange began.

You rolled completely onto him, lips still interlocked with the Leader of the Paladin's lips, your fingers locked firmly onto his. His lips moved passionately against yours, sync and completely trusting. You wanted to drown in the feeling of him... his skin's texture... his breath hot against your face...

His left hand let yours go, firmly placing itself at your hip, drawing your complete body weight onto his. You guys broke apart, grasping for air, his energy still seeping into your skin. A smile crept onto his face, pink dusting his cheeks, “Y/N,” he started, voice hoarse and thick, “I think I lo-” You smiled widely, before a sharp pain flared across your skin. You jerked back, the pain flaring up in your plams, and into him.

Into your willing victim.

 _He is Zarkon's now,_ Hagger's voice called through the pain, as he grunted the pain flaring wildly. You screamed, the fury burning deep, “No!”

“Yes,” Hagger's voice rasped, hand reaching out and grasping your hair, dragging you to your feet as Shiro withered in pain. You struggled, realizing with complete understanding.

You were back in your cell, fighting blinding. The Galra soldiers had you pinned against the floor, but the transaction was almost completely done and your energy seep with Shiro's in the Emperor.

Zarkon stood away from your body, his icy hand leaving the inside of your neck. You had no strength to compete. Nor speak.

Hagger eyes you as you lay there, the Galra robotic men letting you crippled on the ground, the only strength remained was enough to let you breath. Zarkon finally spoke, “I completely drained him. The Champion is dead.”

 

-

Shiro fall still in his bed, no breath drawing from his lips. No presence in his body. The door opened as the castle came life as everyone started to awake.

The door slide open, as Keith stood there, “Shiro?” He asked, “I dreamt that-” he started, pausing as his friend didn't respond. “Shiro?” He closed closely, eyes adjusting fully onto the man who had become a brother.

“Shiro!” He called desperately, running to the bedside to find Shiro's body cooling from death.


	30. Chapter Thirty - Dead's Breath

“His death will ring across the Universe,” Hagger mumbled, “his body has been found already.” You lay immobile, but your heart screamed, but even the commonly functioning parts of your body didn't respond to the ache that tore through you. No tears came to your eyes, your jaw didn't ache from trying to hold back any emotion.

You had only the ability to grieve internally.  _How dare you?_ You mind screamed, utter rage and grief echoing in your mind.  **How dare you** _?_

Hagger paused, looking at you coldly as the words tumbled hard from your mind. “You brought it upon him, Earthling. The Champion was always prone to emotions and you allowed it to destroy him.”

You had nothing to say, you were frozen inside with a cold ache that you couldn't explain. You forced your eyes to drift over to the Leader of the Galra – the Black Paladin with the Bayard. With his breath.  _You will pay for this,_ You vowed.

Hagger eyes narrowed, “Thace,” she snarled, before the Galra shouldered his way into the room, looking calm and collected. “You will take this Earthling to the table, this will be her final change.”

 _Will you die? Or rise?_ The woman's voice cooed.

You didn't respond to the gloating, unwilling to give away an essence of your mind. The woman withdrew, allowing your train of thought to continued it's rampage through the corners of your mind. You physically ached, jaw straining as you withheld tears as Thace reached for you. Pulling you forcefully, you knees buckled under the strain and you collapsed hard back onto your knees. Grunting, the Galra caught you by the wrist, fingers secured tightly around and enclosing you in his hold. 

You wrist barked with pain and strain as he dragged your effortlessly to the table in the very room his brother had been killed. He lay your there, leaning over you. His face remained unreadable, a void of emotion that you could distinguish nor read. “Fight and escape, Y/N. Time for your change.” He managed harshly, reaching forward and shoving an chain into your palm, before enclosing your fingers around the object, not bothering to put on your restraints. You after all was unable to move.

“My mother's,” he whispered, “then onto me, this shoulder provide you with what you need.” He finished, before drawing away standing motionless as Hagger walked in with her droids. You watched numbly at their approach, their very steps ingraining into your mind as you watched the world sway. You hadn't felt this remote since... since... your mind attempted to draw yourself back into reality as you watched blankly at their descent.

The droids circled the table, weeding out Thace away from you as Hagger took her position at the front of the table. You mind finally floated to the pits of your very conscience, the area around them sharpening as you focused on the witch's face. You muscles screamed almost instantly at the sharpening of your mind, straining and tearing with effect. Groaning, you clutched the chain in your fist. “A tender heart from pain, is the easiest heart to destroy.” She coaxed out.

You closed your eyes.  _If this is my final day, I will go down as a fighter,_ you vowed, stoking up the fire that was roaring in your veins.

“You were the burden, Y/N, I now hope you realize,” she continued, eyes darkening. Heading tilting away, the world unfocused again and you were drifting...

“ _You aren't a burden!” He protested. Eyes glowing, “You are part of the team now. I don't care if you have PTSD. I don't care if you are scared of the dark. I don't care if I have to throw myself in front of the firing line for you, Y/N. You aren't the burden here, if you leave you will be.” He stood, eyes still blazing._

You body seized, clutching desperately at the memory that start settling into your mind. A wave of nausea followed, washing over you until your mind was back fulling, breathing the depths of your pain. The ache was looming high above you, tearing soullessly at you, you had never received such torment - were they that desperate to bring you to their side? And yet, they would be crudely disappointed, you thought, pulling at the strands of your mind. Finally something broke, the aching of the past drifting back with a state of peace as Shiro's words began to crave their meaning into your mind.  _And I onto you Shiro._  
 

“ _....I understand that you don't hold yourself a lot of credit...” he started, words knitting together effortlessly, though you couldn't help but feel the tension he couldn't rid himself, knotted in his shoulders, “....I understand that you believe that you would amount to anything no more. And I feel we've had this conversation so many times,” he huffed out, through he continued on, “What I saw,” his tone shifted completely as he regarded you again, voice strong and kind, “or heard – more correctly, was...was... strength. I don't want you to bring out what happened previous to that event, because all of us know-”_

You would fight a different sort of strength, you knew, if you wanted to win this game of power. Sinking inbetween reality and the pitch of peace, you closed your eyes against the harsh of the light that seemed to glow brighter around you. Your invisible hands reaching out for an essence of being, fingers brushing against a sense of coldness and overbearing power and pulling. Hagger followed you willing into the Plains of Your Mind.

  
-

Allura had rushed in at the cry Keith managed in pain and fury towards himself as he sobbed. “Keith?” She asked stepping into the doorway, followed by numerous footstep that followed her. “Are you alright-?” She asked, pausing as he crumpled at the side of the bed, “He's dead.” He rasped, throat raw, “I thought it was a dream.” He sobbed.

-

 

You walked, your memories weaving past you as you clipped the chain of a beautiful necklace of a old symbol – one like his sword carried – around you neck, the symbol clasping just under your brother's gift. Your two brothers, you decided, as you turned to meet the witch. You snarled as Hagger approached, brushing past your memories, their sounds of distant laughter, crying, protesting and warfare moved around the two woman. Tears stung your eyes, “You test me on a landscape you think you have conquered, Hagger,” You manged through a firm voice, though your body shivered with the effect. You drew on Thace's energy slowly, as Hagger narrowed you unexpected energy.

Sudden realization dawned in her eyes as you spoke, “Thace would be crumpling on the floor now.” You implied, knowing that you indeed wanted her to think you were draining it forcefully.

She looked vaguely impressed, but then it was gone. “This will be your last day,” she promised, your hairs prickling on your arms. “The next you will be the weapon or dead cold.” 

You stood strong now, eyes blazing, through their tears. “I prefer being dead cold.” You snapped, weighing her with your eyes, “I will never be your weapon.” You promised back, breathing deep.

She attacked fast, striking at you with her energy, flashing across your mind's plain. You dogged, edging warily away from your memories. You snarled, as she struck out again, the plains colourless sky suddenly turning into the darkness of night, stirring before setting in a motion of a storm.

_His looked suggested that he hadn't finished the train of thought, “And maybe the ones you are connected to are closer to your area. I imagine that there are everyone's memories here, but there could be links from demonstration to demonstration, like the Earthling memeories are linked to your home planet Earth.”_

It dawned on you, quite spitefully. 

_He nodded, “It's worth a shot.”_

_Clasping the necklace, feeling slightly like a fool, you closed your eyes thinking hard. The energy from your memories lingered across you skin, offering gentle whispers of the past. The ground shook gently, moving in gentle waves that didn't disturb you._

You grunted, rolling away from her power, before changing the ground shifting before you. “This plan better work.” You muttered to yourself, as you lunged at the witch, clasping the necklace of Thace's. You grabbed at her desperately as the ground jolted around your feet - colours blurring together and sounds roaring like a hurricane against  your ears. Heaving at the motion, you staggered away from her, muscles taunt as the everything stopped. And the started. 

You were standing in a ground of warfare. Rocking carved the land brutally, up into the steeps of a weeping volcano. It's lava seeped through the channels, hissing and cracking as it met moisture and greenery that had, probably, surrounded the alive volcano. Pushing yourself forward, you were sprinting through the rough terrain, hoping that your ankles would not twist in your desperate attempts to flee from her. Weaving cautiously through the rocks, you forced yourself further into the fiery landscape, wishing deeply for another idea to come to your mind. But your mind didn't get anywhere, the thoughts of Thace's mother hitting every base of your skull. She died here - you could feel it. You could feel the energy of the volcano's very being, it's ability to kill and destroy everything in it's path.

Raw energy. 

Sending a pray to anyone that would listen, you continue on, sweat sampening your clothing, your lungs burning as you continued to run around the steep in a feeble attempt to find something suitable for her on-going plan.  _This better work._

Panting, you gathered up a stone – size of your fist – too hot to touch. The stone burnt and yet something held it still on your palm, tears from the heat and pain staining your ashen cheeks. Heaving against the agony, you allowed yourself to stumble to a halt, cradling weakly at you hand.  _Hold. Hold. Hold._ You other fist was enclosing around you smoldering hand, as you finally screamed, sobs retching your body as you forced your legs to  _move._   She was gaining on you, you could feel her presence twisting in the mist that you moved in. She'd catch up shortly, you knew, but you legs wouldn't stop moving as you fist unwinded around you alarmingly numb one. 

And catch up she did, body moved rigidly within the mist, she stopped before you. Launching your body in her direction, as another arm of lightening was cast out, breathing passed you, you caught her hand with yours, mind touching before caving to each other. You searched: searched for the Plains you shared with her, mind racing through the fragments you could distinguish through the mess of her memories. The land shifted again-

You were unsure whether the scream was yours or hers, as you tumbled into the Plain Hagger presented you with. Whether it was hers or yours, Hagger let another high and shrill would puncture through the air, her arms of magic ripping crudely through the air. You flinched aside, eyes widening as attempted to move again. You were held firm.

 _Hagger and the woman were undoubtedly related but Hagger shouldn't know of this plain,_ you thought, pushing through the mist that started to whip around you. Hagger suddenly laughed, “You Mind's plain is the area you can control completely, why do you think I always brought you here?” She cooed, the mist hardening around you. You groaned as the realization hit you. 

 

-

Nobody moved, watching as Allura froze, her voice barely a whisper, “No.” She coaxed, posture stiff, “No.” She repeated, voice cracking with the effect.

-

 

You had been so  _naive_. Hagger had the higher ground and you had lost your element for surprise.  _Dammit!_

Her wild laughter continued to echo across the plain – across  _her_ mind plain. “Isolation from your memories was a clever move, Y/N – admittedly. Though you have much to learn.” She mocked, stepping out of the mist. The woman stared back at you, and you felt your mouth dry, as the woman spoke, face shifting back into Hagger's.

You had been played all this time, you thought numbly, your anger returning. But then you couldn't take you all for a fool, Hagger had obviously hid her memories into a pocket of the plain – maybe another dimension... so you had no choice. The thought was horrendously important - something in your life that you doubt that you would forget. If you lived long enough to remember. 

“I have the higher ground, Y/N, you fool.” She hissed, as she began to circle you. “I always have.”

 

-

Shiro was lain out gently, like he was just asleep. All the team still in shock from their find, moved stiffly, as Coran lay him on a white table. Allura drew up next to Keith, eyes shining with tears, “Did he have a sickness?” She managed,

Keith shook his head, “None that I know,” he breathed, his tears hardening. “He was the strongest out of us all.” The dream repeated in his mind, “I-I-” He tried, voice hoarse, though he was exactly sure on what the dream had presented.

“Y/N is was there.” He whispered, “They- they...” he trailed off, eyebrows quaking.

-

 

You watched her circle you again, fighting your facial's into neutral. Fist still clutching the rock.  _Fight._ And you would. Hagger didn't seem concerned, her thin lips still held into a smirk. “You have always picked the wrong choice, haven't you?”

You stood firm, despite the tears that continued to steam from the sulfuric smoke of the volcanic lands. “Even that, you your are terribly misinformed about which choice was.” You replied, coldly.

She would kill you, you knew, this had to be time just right.

_“_ _Fight and escape, Y/N. Time for your change.” Thace managed, reaching forward and shoving a chain, into your palm, before enclosing your finger around it._

_I will change_ , you vowed, watching her as you started to draw the energy from Thace again.  _This better work._

Refraining from closing your eyes, you allowed your mind to drift back into the real reality. You could hear his heartbeat, as his end came quickly.  _Hang on Thace._  Shifting your energy concentration, the connection between you and Thace snapped, quaking and then crumpling as the rock occupied his space. It's energy roared within, filling your veins and limbs - it's power feeling pleasant and blissful to behold. Your mind shifted back to Hagger, eyes still watching her intently.

Hagger's eyes narrowed, “Maybe,” she thought loudly. “Maybe I did, but we'd never know.” She raised her hands, the mists wrapping around you tightly in a circular motion as the lightening struck out again.

You meet her energy with the flame; drawing on the Plain's rage, feeling the shifting of the Plains as it ran through your veins hotle. Both fire and lightening flickered across the landscape, in angry attempts to kill. Kill.  _Kill._

Hagger's lightening hissed around your ears, trying to reach you through the vale of anger you built yourself. Her mind, instead, began the invade. Clasping her hand around your mind, she was back onto the higher ground. Which, sensibly, hadn't surprised you. You grasped back.

 

-

Allura froze. Eyes suddenly wide, “Y/N was there?” She asked, looked at Keith hard.

Keith blinked rapidly, startled by the sudden question, “Yes.”

Allura looked sharply to Coran, “Coran! Grab something of Y/N from her room, we need this.” Coran looked up, brow furrowing. Unlucky for him, Allrua wasn't in a patient mood. “Go! Even cloth, tear it up and tire it to Shiro's wrist.”

-

 

You were moving forward, the landscape was changing again, as the fire whipped and licked across the mist.  _The worst pain, is to realize that you are the fault of all of this,_ Hagger's voice crowed, as you fall hard to your knees, panting frantically. A scream tore through you now, echoing... echoing. You spun around to face her, face fresh with tears. " _How dare you?"_

The bombs whistled up ahead, dirt rained upon your forehead, showering you in memories of your darkest hour. You clawed your way back around to face the battlefeild from so long ago, fingers digging into the familiar coarseness of the sand, grains sinking into your nails as you watched you comrades descended into madness. 

You watched as you comrades ran, their yelling over the gunfire rose to meet you. Hagger laughed, “So we start from the beginning.” You closed your eyes.

 

-

Coran obeyed, as Keith's face twisted in anger, “What is this about?” He snapped, following the two Alteans to the table, Shiro's body lay. Lance grabbed at the angry boy, “Keith-” he tried, only to be shoved aside by Keith. Coran knotted the cloth around his wrist, looking curiously at his princess.

Allura's face was hard, “It's up to Y/N now.” She simply said, as he brushed aside the questions the grieving team asked. “If she cares, she'll make that decision.”

-

 

 _Time for the change._ You opened them again, gathering up your courage, the fiery energy rolling in your veins. You jerked forward onto your feet, rushing forward fast-like. Hagger wouldn't be able to follow unless she wanted time to change.

“You know this place, use it.” You encouraged, weaving in between the dead, aware of the raining of bombs. You hoped that yourself wouldn't be able to recognize yourself. A rain of dirt scattered in the air before falling hard. This was the rain that had you falling, you remembered vaguely, pushing forward, you calf's aching with the effect. You feet lead you. " _You know this place: Use it!"_

You lungs ached with exhaustion as you stumbled, another bomb nearing the area you ran. Everything about you - around you - was chaotic... you forgot it. You had forgotten it. You heart sunk, and your heart rate picked up. You wanted to scream again, but you pushed it aside, a shower of dirt and sand raining upon you. “I realized you injured ten minutes after this bomb.” You murmured, forcing yourself to keep your mind otherwise blank." _I realized you were injured ten minuted after this bomb."_

A body was up ahead, his body limp and dying as he heaved breaths of blood. He was your brother you knew, with no doubt as you heart sunk again.  _My brother._  Skidding hard of your knees, you fall in-beside him.  _Eight minutes._

He coughed loudly, body jerking from the pain as you pulled him into your arms. “Sister?” He chocked out, eyes bright with pain. Feverish.

You looked at him sharply, lips trembling uselessly “Yes?” You whispered, aware of the ground shaking from another rain of bombs.

A smile tugged on his lips and you felt yourself cracking, “You were the best in me... remember that...  _hmmm_?”

You wanted to flee. You heart wanted it. Every fiber in your being wanted to run and never look back and yet you held firm. “No, you were always the best in me,” tears stung your eyes as you sobbed, “I love you, little brother.”

His weak smile grew, but his face paled, as his body seized again, “I love you too, sis. I'm glad you have always remembered me.”

 _What?_ You looked at him wildly, unsure on what to make on his statement, as sand and dirt washed over you again, “I-”

 _Six minutes._ A laugh erupted out in his throat, “You've literally been the Black Paladin's chosen energy source since you were like...  _seven-_  Y/N... a woman follows you- the Galra woman told me.”

 _They have been on Earth before?_ You were struck motionless, “Who?”

“Keii-” he wheezed, body sagging, his eyes drifted, “You must save him, Y/N. Don't let a second person you love die.” And he died, his head falling limp in your arms.

You sobbed, hand cradling his head as you rocked as a resurgence of grief overcame you. “ _No_." No. No. No. No. 

_Don't let a second person you love die-_

_-Four minutes._ You forced yourself to set him down, knees shaking as you pulled yourself to the balls of feet to gather his weapons. You would need these, you knew, for the next thing she took you too. You would need these, despite, you reflected, that you only had one useful hand. You left hand was completely useless, mangled from the heat of the rock. Uncertainty, you checked the folds of your melted skin and bloody creases of your fingers and found the rock to still be enclosed in your palm.

You shoved the gun into you belt, and his grenades cautiously, you could find a ounce of your wit to care for your hand. You had to do it. Kissing his brow a final time, you stood, shaking uncontrollably. Turning back to Hagger, expectantly you weighed her with a dark look as she continued her slow approach. “Are you planning on killing me with those?” She left no time to reply, as her mind reach for yours for the last time, the plain shifting again. This time the transaction seemed hard and more wild than the last, groaning as it transformed and rolled. You groaned, thinking quickly. 

She was going to take you to a Plain that would be convenient for _her_  - not you. You had too do something. You were searching again - extending out to Thace, you fingers brushing over his form and outwards. You had to find something to use. Something that you were undeniably connected to. Would the Castle of Lions be too far of a stretch? 

Pushing the thought aside, you allowed your mind to look at connections - startled when indeed you  _did find something._ Excitingly, you pulled towards it.

You were standing over Shiro in a sudden, heart aching anew as you looked upon his peaceful features. He was dead - or close to it and yet if couldn't take away the beauty of his features that were lit up by the Garrison lights that extended across the sand and onto him. Hagger's cried out in frustration of the different landscape, her energy extending out again, cuffing you the arm. You staggered, falling hard over Shiro's body as you cried out in pain. Your own power slowly coming around you in defense.

The flames wrapped around you and the body of Shiro protectively, securely you safely in the depths of a storm. The fire roar and groaned against the flickering of lightening,  heaving at the resurgence of their meeting - none diminishing the other. You pulled yourself up against Shiro, brushing your hand over his face, “He's already dead, little brother.” You whispered, through you free hand still reached to caress his features gently. He wasn't dead yet, you mind adjusted, but how could you bring someone back from that far gone anyway?

You found you already knew. Taking nervous breath, you leant in, hand spraying over his chest as your other hand weakly slumped under his rib-cage, “Your energy shall remain your own, now.” You whispered, as the flame began to beat around you like wings. Drawing around you, it began to lick you skin and then sweetly onto Shiro's.

The rock began to cool now as it sunk into his skin, dancing through his own veins and to his cooling heart. You fingers around falling loose as you stared blindly at the man you loved.

 

-

The teams was arguing, tears sparkling in their eyes, but Allura remained firm, “Y/N will do it. She will, you have to have more faith in her.” Was all she said as she sat herself down, staring blankly at Shiro's dead body. The rest followed my example, sitting down anxiously, as Shiro opened his eyes, his chest heaving with breath.

-

 

You felt him come back, his energy moving effortlessly back into his body as the fire died completely. You stood, with a victorious yell, your hand reaching for your weapons already.  _Thank you. Thank you._

Hagger's energy reached across to you as you removed the gun from your belt, raising it and shooting. The electrical arms reached your first, seizing your body in it's electrical arms. The bullet ricocheted against her firing line, flicking wild. But it was enough to break her attention.

With a brief rest, you charged forward, clasping onto her mind again. You shoved her out, and you followed, finding yourself back onto the table, your body heaving.

You were the first to move, throwing yourself up into a sitting position. Thace had been dragged out of the room, you were pleased to see, as you cast the first grenade, the room lighting up as you came to the door.

  
  


 


	31. Chapter Thirty-one - Dread's Touch

You were running blinding, the gas stinging your eyes and suffocating you slowly as you ran through the corridors. Alarms blared, rising and falling in a high-pitched wail. You forced yourself the descent to your escape, your feet leading you through the maze.

The hallways flicked, the smoke filling your nostrils. “Shiro.” You gasped, feeling his heartbeat soundly it's rhythm. Strong and sure.

You could feel his presence, you mind lingering at the feeling of his pull. Someone had tied some cloth to his wrist, you noted dimly, which you found slightly disturbing.

Someone must have noticed the situation – but that also meant that you had gone back in time to Shiro last moments, which meant....

 _No._ You thought, pushing the thought aside, knowing where the thought would take you. It would take you to the past and that at the moment was already something that didn't need to be dwindled on. Huffing heavily, your pushed down the corridors, mind sharp against everything with the corridors themselves, the lights were harsh on the eyes, stretching it's colour over the walls, washing it like it too had to dominate it's surroundings.

Much like the Galra Empire.

The corridors were identical, mirrored and quite wide, nothing moved beyond your feet – nothing stopped you as you descended towards your escape. Thace wouldn't be able to pull your through this, he won't have transport for you to go by – no, you would have to make do.

Crossing the Plains were unquestionable – you daren't enter them, they were to remain there and you here, you had done enough crossing of the Plains to serve for ten people.

As you drew up to the exit, only then did you cross the soldiers, already charging at them, reaching out your grabbed one, your presence already working to drain his energy – completely? No. But enough to disarm him completely – and after all, you would gift the remaining energy to Thace afterwards, in an attempt to help him recover. If this solider couldn't recover on his own, then Hagger or Zarkon will deal with him.

His blood was not yours to spill, but it was yours to direct. You had has energy, you could do anything.

You let him crumple to the ground, setting your chin as you watched the soldiers warily raise their weapons, but they didn't raise to fire. They thought you'd be able to direct that energy used to your own benefit – the thought was startling enough and half of you believe that maybe you could if taught. But that would be later, you promised yourself, as you moved forward quickly, using your gained energy to your own ends, using your learnt skill from Earth of the enemy. You hand and hand combat that your brother had furiously made sure was drilled in you, despite his younger years.

You threw all your body into the blows, striking out fast and ruthlessly, your adrenaline serving as a reserve to your excessive energy, your burnt hand – still numb and gushing with blood – left it's mark, you hand print gracing their uniform as each fall to your feet, the energy draining into you. You had no idea how you would cope with too much energy, but none of that was your concern as you made it to the hanger. You paused at the door, gathering up another grenade in your ruined palm.  _Thace._ You called, your mind reaching out to hear his faint heartbeat. You allowed energy to drain into his, only a quarter of what you had earned, but it was more than enough.

Moments later, Thace was lingering in the shadows, “Y/N.” He greeted at a whisper, he was still stiff from the exchange, but the energy hopefully would help him forget how much you had pushed him to his breaking point.

You hesitated, unsure on what to say. A thank you? A sorry? Maybe even a goodbye.... You unclasped the necklace from your neck, “Here,” you offered instead.

Thace offered a croaked grin, “No. Keep it now,” he glazed lazily at the crippled bodies, half dead the other's dying, “We are honored to have guided the Dread's Touch to her destination beyond.”

 _Dread's Touch?_ You had referred to the woman-  _no!_ Hagger – as that, you remembered vaguely, brows furrowing.

Thace grinned, “Dread goes both ways, Y/N. You will instilled dread to those who cross you, and you will touch it to the hearts of those who command to kill you and those you hold. And since I happen to be standing on the enemies side, I must be complied to be calling you such a title.”

You managed a smile, “I hope you complied unwillingly.” You whispered, as the door slid up. You frowned, watching it as you set the grenade back into your pocket. You looked back at him, as he shrugged, but you caught a glimpse of him setting back a screen. “I afraid I complied quite happily, Y/N. You after all almost killed me – twice.” And then he was gone, weaving in the shadows again, as you stepped into the hanger bay, footsteps echoing in the corridors.

Now they come.

The doors hang open, and you knew that possibly Thace wasn't alone on this godforsaken ship after all. You hoped so.

Running hard, you grinned finding the space craft that you had taken to get here, and allowed yourself in. You were going home...

-

The trap was fast like the time you ran away from the destination you now headed. You would have to explain yourself, before you would gather information on the coordinates in the Plain. Hagger wasn't died after all, she was merely disorientated and would still have some hold on your mind.

You hoped that your rebellion was enough to convince her to leave you alone for awhile to come. But she wouldn't, as soon as you calmed down, she'll have you back in a position that you would have to rebuke again.

But she'd have to gather her energy, you thought, aware of the platform you two had in-common.

She was superior in the arts – for obvious reasons that should not be said – but you were willing to become her match in the field, especially if it saved your loved ones in the process.

The thought of having to leave the Paladins again, wasn't at all satisfying, but it would have to be done before they were completely safe from Hagger's horrible reach.

“Shiro,” You murmured as the ship came into view.

A screen immediately flickered up on your panel, Allura's face serious and grim, “Y/N?” She asked, face suddenly breaking into something more soft.

You managed a rueful smile, “I have a lot to explain,” you started as the other's came into view, Keith was the more puzzled. Something between anger and confusion.

“You were in my dream!” He snapped suddenly, cheeks reddening as he realized how childish it came from his mouth.

You hadn't expected to be welcomed with open arms, you thought mildly, weighing the angry boy.  _Hagger must've planted the information in his dream-state._

You swore to block their minds if you learnt who to. “I know,” You replied in the same tone that you held eye-contact with him, “ _A lot_  to explain, but I believe a  _real_  face to face would be more appropriate.”

How they would react to you and Shiro meeting – with, assumingly, no knowledge or warning – was beyond you, maybe they would react mostly our in confusion or frustration that they hadn't been kept in the hoop. How they would react to what you learnt you could do was beyond you capabilities.

But the deserved the truth and so you would spit the words out, you would ink the words out, maybe make them bleed with the emotion you had felt, the words red, full of meaning and this time they would understand you completely.

The screen faltered and then went off as the Hanger doors opened. You were home, you thought as you lead your ride into the room.


	32. Chapter Thirty-two - Future's Eyes

They didn't bother to comment on your state, as Coran collected you from the Hanger, leading you down the corridors. “Coran...” You started, your nerves suddenly grabbing at you. You hadn't felt this nervous is a long time.

You had felt frightened. Wary... but not nervous. You were scared that they would think you were the true demon among the others. They you would be held in the same light as Hagger or that of Zarkon.

You could drain energy from any energy source –  _anything._

 _His face remained indifferent, “You have the power to control energy, Y/N of Earth. You can divide and control –_ contain _.-”_

Thace had told you. Control. Divide. Contain. Anything sort... it appeared, noting your crippled hand, you were startling to feel it again, you thought grimace, flexing it gingerly.

Coran looked over to you, “Y/N....” he greeted, seemingly as hesitate as you, but nervous? Probably not, if they lost you, they didn't loss much.

“How...” you throat was dry, but you forced yourself to keep eye-contact, “how is he?” You whispered, mind directly to the man that you loved furiously – something you thought didn't exist. Once upon a time, you thought with some bittersweet tones, you had given up trying to find the one. And when you hadn't tried he had come to your aid, allowing you into his own. Willing – trusting.

Coran thought for a moment, unsure on how to respond, “You'll be able to see him.” You felt like an animal, and the thought spark annoyance in the pit of your stomach. Once you had been frustrated at Iverson treating you as a child, now you were being treated as someone different.

You forced yourself to sigh, to show your relief, “Thank you.” And you meant it, after you shoved the annoyance aisde.

Coran paused at the door, eyes suddenly pure and trustworthy. Hopeful. “You are always apart of the team, Y/N. But...but...” he faltered unsure on how to go about the situation.

You smiled grimly at him, “I know, I am still prone to Hagger presence, she'll come back and I know why you hesitate. I will seek out help, Coran trust me.”

Coran looked at your evenly, brows furrowing, “I trust you.” He replied honesty.

“But I wanted to see the team before I departed to find them,” you continued, “after all, you guys are family to me.”

The door slide open, revealing the team seated on the circular chairs, Lance and Hunk ere talking in harsh tones – maybe excited? Pidge appeared worried, and conflicted, looking bewildered. Keith appeared the most unimpressed, a frown gently creasing on his forehead, hand lacing together as he watched you enter. Shiro had your back to you, shoulders tense, but appeared fine.

_Fine._

You halted, looking at the back of Shiro's head, tears threatening to spill onto your face, “Thank whoever guards me, you are alive.” You knew he was indeed alive, but this well?

You expected that maybe he would still be weak and unable to communicate – but near sort of energy was just energy. Whether from the Planet's core, or from a beings heart. He turned quickly in his chair, standing. “Y/N.” His voice broke. You moved, moving to embrace him.

“No!” Allura snapped, drawing both of you up short.

You felt your heart sting, but you forced to look at Allrua, “Allura...” you tried, realizing your error. You shouldn't have invested immediately in Shiro, now they expected you to wanted to kill him again. “I brought him back.” You whispered, head bowing.

“But you also took it away.” She snarled, you looked at her sharply, feeling the fury eating back at you, burning inside you.

“That was none of my decision, Allura. I had no idea Zarkon could...  _do that_. He was overbearing and horrible, Hagger was my master within the arts, she had complete control of me, if she dared. She wanted me to offer my strength to Zarkon, to gather strength from  _anything_ , and gift it to Zarkon. Whether it was because he wanted this extra strength to face Voltron, or actually needed it, I have no clue. He was strong enou-”

“It was your decision to put Shiro endanger.” Keith managed, voice deep as he try to control his anger.

You didn't need to look at Shiro to know that his eyes were burning, he turned to the group, “But also my decision, I asked for her to take my energy.”

That was new news to the group, you noticed, had Shiro filled anything? No, probably not. He probably wanted to wait for your input.

Allura eyes burned back at the Black Paladin, “Now you talk?” She snapped, before sighing heavily as though she was exhausted. Shiro remained silent, forcing Allura to speak again, “ _And_ you also choose to meet Y/N, when everyone else was worried about her... and that isn't even the best part,  _in secret._ ”

“It wasn't secret if Hagger knew we were, whom she obviously did. Otherwise how would she be able to trace me to that Plain? None of it was connected to her. I may have been a fool to consider putting Shiro endanger...” you paused, waiting for anyone to interrupt. When no one did, you continued, “Shiro was put in an sticky situation, he was making sure I wasn't in complete danger. I pleaded-”

“Y/N,” Shiro tried to intervene, you didn't meet his eyes.

Ignoring him, you sighed, “-for him not to get me, I may've known Shiro was apart of some plan, but I didn't know which direction Hagger was considering. I told him not to get me from Zarkon in physical form, I knew that with the distance Hagger could've done something to hurt him – disable him, I have no clue?” You sighed again, this time in frustration, “She had hinted at a trap, and I immediately assumed that she was thinking about the Paladins of Voltron coming to collect me – free me from her bonds. I needed to stop the idea, first of all. You would've, whether it be a couple of days or a week, you would've. I was new to the idea of the dimensions – I had no idea what could be done there at the start. But all energy runs through the Plains, I now know. Energy is always connected.”

 _Energy can't be lost, only gained._ And in these cases, gained by another individual.

“I had no idea, Hagger could feed her energy into Zarkon, so he could gather mine, that I was receiving from Shiro at that time. They was obviously expecting it, but I expecting that? No. I was naive and green to everything here – still am. It's no excuse, I know. Ii should've used my head, but I didn't even sense Hagger in my mind at the time and thought that she allowed some ground for me to work as myself...”

There was a silence, and you noticed tears were falling down you face, but your voice remained cool and collected, “She wanted to fix me,” she continued, “she told me anyway. When she realized what I was coming to be, she knew that if I got out of hand she'd have to put me to rest. She needed to kill me in the end, Allura... Keith, Pidge, Hunk, Lance, Coran and Shiro.” You listed off their names, unsure why you had down it.

Maybe you wanted to make sure they knew you were addressing them, so they had to listen. “A game that extends out of simple capabilities is always dangerous.” You confirmed, eyeing each in return. “Keith what you saw was a message sent from Hagger, she wanted Shiro's death become announced before the ending of the day and saw to address it as soon as Shiro's warmth began to dwindle. Your dreams were directed by Hagger, which brings me to another point,” You paused, realizing that you were rumbling on. Keith looked conflicted – indeed, why would Hagger pick Keith over everyone?

But then you would remember how much of a brotherly bond they shared and then took the thought away.

A blush crept onto your face, but you forced yourself to continue, “That means Hagger know where to find your Mind's Plain. I doubt she'll travel there unless it involves directly with her dreams. But if this war between Voltron and Zarkon starts to get messy, I'll have to... figure out our to shield your memories and your mind. I can't completely block her, but she won't be able to twist your mind. I have been given coordinates to where I can be taught further into this art. I will be on my way shortly.”

“What?” Shiro finally asked, voice hoarse and sad.

You nodded, “Yes, it'll be for the best. I will return after my teachings, I will give you the coordinates so you know where I will remain and if desired, you can visit.” You allowed a ghost of a smile creep on your face, “They won't deny the Paladins of Voltron after all.”

“You just came back!” Pidge cried, finally standing, setting her laptop gently on the chair.

Lance nodded furiously, “We just got all our team back.” He added, sending you a look that suggested promises of death.

You nodded again, your head suddenly heavy, “I know, but you guys won't be safe with me until I learn a few things that'll deflect Hagger from me. You guys are already putting yourself into the danger-zone, I will not plague your home with the sense of insecurity. You deserve a place to break down before you build yourself back up.”

Shiro finally went to you, brow furrowing as he enveloped you into a embrace, his skin warm and breath strong with his heart beat. You lent heavily into him, accepting his act of comfort and embraced him in return. “Is this okay?” You whispered in his ear.

He nodded into your shoulder, “Come back to me, Y/N. Come back to me,” he stepped away, hand gingerly locking with your wrist over you injuyed hand, “What-?” He asked unable to finish.

You followed it glaze, managing an genuine smile, “Fire is never good to play with.” You admitted sheepishly, wincing. You still couldn't feel it, apart from where it was attracted to your wrist. It was completely damaged.

“Yes,” he whispered, with a small smile, though he looked worried back at you, “you will carry the scars, even with the-”

“A small price to pay,” You interrupted, “for your life, trust me.” You wouldn't tell him just yet what happened after... his passing. You would wait until you felt that it was time. The truth would be your burden for awhile yet. He looked at you soulfully, like he wasn't frightened of what had happen previously to him when he was with you.

Like it never happened. You kissed him gently on the lips, not caring whether the team watched you. Shiro kissed you back, his lips caressing yours in a bittersweet touch, you tasted salt and realized startled that the leader of Paladin was crying at you touch.

He had never been terrified about his pain. But yours, and you were about to exit his warm embrace and further into the unknown – a place Shiro didn't want you to linger at all. You pulled away first, finally paying attention to the gagging noises in the back.

You knew instantly that it was Lance, desperate to bring it back into similar atmosphere from the beginning of this crazy journey. You smiled brightly at Shiro, forehead pressed to his as he continued to look at your injured wrist. He sighed, “Lance, we can hear you.”

“Good,” he snorted, as someone struck him. Yelping the boy protested, voice muffled next, “It was horrfic-”

“Tame compared to what you get up to in your mind.” Keith grunted out, obviously keeping the friendly boy in a headlock. It was also obvious that Lance had mouthed something to provoke him into the situation that lead him into sticking up for you – a person whom he obviously was conflicted about.

Keith kept his emotions close, so you knew you would probably be able to gain his trust back. Keith would open hell for Shiro and whether that was forcing his doubts aside, he was willing to just do that, again.

You drew away from Shiro completely, “I will come back to you again.” You directed your attention to the group, “All of you. And I will make it up to you, for what has happened.”

Most of their looks suggested that they had already allowed their hearts to heal, and forgive. Other's suggested that their was nothing to forgive and give. But you would do your best to prove that you were the Y/N – not the teacher, nor the madwoman, but Dread's Touch, the woman who would go beyond to turn the universe into the stars and planets of freedom and peace.

 _Dread goes both ways,_ Thace had told you.

 _Good, the Galra Empire will see what they have awaken,_ you thought, determination inking in your veins and you found yourself smiling again.

**_The End._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that I haven't been a very attentive writer for this book. But thank you for the read, kudos and comments, they mean so much to me, even though I don't have the courage to respond.


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